How To Meet Girls in Jakarta?

By The Jakarta Team

Meeting girls in Jakarta is easy, but surprisingly, meeting good girls can be quite hard. At first, most single expats men who arrive in the city are extremely satisfied with their new condition of sex symbol. But after a few months, they realize that most of the girls they go out with are not what they expected: Very often, they lie, cheat, party a lot, take drugs, cannot commit, and are way too materialistic. This is a very dark picture, but many of you will have recognized a past or present situation, maybe not as ugly but similar.

News 2015: This article is still valid but since I wrote it, online dating has become huge. Check my guide: Online dating websites and Apps in Indonesia.

We all know that meeting a girl in a bar is not a smart thing to do, but in spite of that, this is the place where 90% of the "love-stories" between expats and Indonesian girls start. Most of these stories fail, and failures after failures, you start to realize that in bars & clubs, the girls you meet are mostly hookers or men-eaters, and you can't change them.

You may then ask yourself:

Where are the intelligent, smart, beautiful women in Jakarta, the one we want to live with or marry? How can expats meet decent girls in Jakarta?

I know around 50 expats/indonesian girls couples functioning well in Jakarta. Few of them met in bars. I made a survey on them, plus I added my own experience. The result is a good summary of how to meet girls you would want to marry in Jakarta, in no particular order:

Friends of Good friends:
Most of the couples I know were formed during private parties, dinners or in a social context when different groups of friends are mixing up. It may be a birthday party in Dragonfly, a wedding, a dinner between colleagues. Don't be afraid to pass the word around you that you are fed up with the bar scene, and that you are looking for a serious woman to be with. People love doing the match-making, and soon, they will try to arrange some meetings/dates with girls they know who have the same feelings than you. Be subtle and don't look desperate though. If your intentions are clear for everyone around you, you will become THE bachelor, and you will have a team working for you.

Why it's a good idea?: People from your circle usually know other persons who belong to the same social circle than you: Same jobs, same revenues, same education. It means you may meet someone with whom you have more things in common than a hostess in Blok M. I'm not criticizing girls in Blok M, but you have to admit it is a lot more difficult to connect with them, apart from the physical attraction.

- Classes: (Salsa, Cooking, etc...)
Other bule/Indo couples I know met during classes, especially dance lessons and cooking classes:
Type of girls: 30ish, Rich, Classy, Normal jobs, speak English, who would rather date an expat than an indonesian guy (for cultural reasons).
Why it's easy?: In these activities, there are a lot more guy than girls and you, the expat, are the target of these girls.
Why it can be tricky?: For Salsa: Even if you are there to learn, it's better to be a good cavalier and to enjoy dancing. If you are faking, you will loose all your appeal.
Where: Tuesday evening, 19h in Mistere, in Ritz Carlton.

- Internet
Internet is a good way to meet girls in Jakarta, but you should be careful because it is a tool used by many prostitutes too. Beware of the sexually explicit profile, or of girls that are too aggressive and down to the point.
Type of girls: Many girls who are not used to go clubbing but who would also like meeting a foreigner. Usually from the middle class and cute, traditional but not too much.
Why it's easy?: With internet, girls are not scared to talk with you . By chatting a few girls, you also have a lot more different opportunities to choose from.
Where do I start? Badoo, Tagged, Facebook, Yahoo Messenger

You can also try to post an ad on Jakarta100bars: Personals / Classifieds Jakarta
Muslima is a website for those who wish to meet Indonesian Muslim girls
- Weddings
Type of girls: A little bit of everything, depending on the wedding.
Why it's easy?: If you are not anti-social, you should be invited to a lot of them during your stay in Indonesia. Just like in Europe, weddings give thoughts to most girls, who will be in a positive state of mind to meet a potential boyfriend. You will also have the possibility to ask question about the girl you like because chances are the person who invited you know her, and will probably be happy to make the two of you meet.

-Cultural Events
If your embassy organizes events, then it is a great opportunity to meet girls, usually well-educated and smart, who have an interest in your home country's culture and language. The French Cultural Center shows and exhibitions are always packed with student girls who dream about going to Paris and who are very open at the idea of meeting a French guy.

- Malls
Type of girls: Depending on the mall, from spoiled girls to middle-class ones. Hanging out in malls in the most popular activity of Jakartans so this is the place to go to see and meet lots of different woman. In my opinion it is over-rated: To be honest, the guys I know who met girls in Malls were often disappointed because they found out the girls were interested in $$$.
Why it's difficult though?: You have to walk to them and talk. Good girls are usually quite shy to be seen with foreigners in public and they will probably be a little distant, especially in front of their friends. Your objective should only be to get a phone number, nothing more. Some places are more easy within the mall of course, like the cinema, the gym, or any queues...

- Workplace:
Type of girls: Obviously, the working, independant, educated type.
Why it's difficult?: It's never too good to mix work and love. You have to be very careful, but if you are discreet, it can work well and it made at least a couple expat friends happy. To be noted: They were Expats working in large companies, and the person they dated didn't work in the same department than them.

- Some bars/clubs
Type of girls: Rarely the good ones you can trust, but at least the funkiest ones and the prettiest ones.
Why it's easy?: Girls go to clubs to meet guys, they get drunk, they flirt, etc...
For tricks about meeting girls in Jakarta bars & night clubs, I wrote a special post available here: Which bars to find girls in Jakarta? and you can also read my list of Ladies' nights in Jakarta.

And what about you? Where do you think are the good areas to find "normal" girls in Jakarta? Please share with us!

Photos were taken from Flickr and they are supposed to be "free of use". For any complaints please just email me!

165 comments to '' How To Meet Girls in Jakarta? "

  1. nice to know expat's point of view about finding good girl in jakarta. i think you should know from jakarta girl point of view too. you can't classify type of girl based on where you meet them, because all jakarta girls go to mall, clubs, wedding, b'day party, office. to make it easier for you to understand me, i will tell you a life of a career women in jakarta.
    they will be busy at WORK from morning until night. and at work they will use INTERNET actively, ym, msn, facebook, multiply, tweeter. even when they come home from work because they have their own laptop and internet modem. they will not spend time walking in mall during work hours and work days, unless for lunch, brainstorming, meeting, or they are on leave from work. if they have time, after work, they will go to GYM. they will hang out with friends in restaurants in MALLS on friday night after work. (sushitei/starbucks). if they don't like clubbing, or not in the mood for clubbing, they hang out for DINNER, COCKTAIL or WINE (loewy/social house/cork n screw/eastern promise/tabac). if they like CLUBBING, they will go for dance, watching a a famous DJ or attending a friend's bday party (dragon fly/immigrant/blowfish/red square). at saturday, they will go to mall, hang out with friends in mall, watch movies in mall (plaza semanggi/plaza senayan/senayan city/plaza indo/grand indo/ratu plaza/mall ambasador/itc mangga dua), ATTENDING WEDDING, go to food festival, bazaar, swim pool, gym, photo hunting in museums, SUSHI CLASS, dance class or whatever interesting event they can do on weekend. and on sunday, basically doing the same thing. so.... just like what i said before, u can't categorized type of girl based on where meet them, because almost all type of jakarta girls do all things u mention, LOL.

    my conclusion is, to find a good jakarta girl is not based on where you meet them, but it is based on how well do u know them personally and how compatible you are as partner.

    1. Why peoples thinking so cheap, if u didnt respect to womens so dont blame her also , why u not thinks about ur mother and sisters

  2. CC: This is the second time I see a comment made by you in this blog, and (again) you try to give an utopic image about the indonesian girls to defend them. The article is very realistic.

  3. I am interested to know how to meet a good expat in Jakarta.

    I have met an expat boyfriend in my work place but he loved to play around with girls at bars/clubs. He is not afraid to play my heart even we worked in the same office. Since I don't like clubbing, I gave him a time to hang out with his expat friends. I thought I was a good girlfriend by giving time for him with his female friends but I was wrong. They never known that most of girls at the club or bar are not good girls, you can see from their appearance (their dress, their make up & their attitude). A good girls sometime go to the club/bar but only for special occasion, they always go there with a bunch of friends and there is always some men with them because they need men to protect them, just in case there are naughty drunken man.

    I also have met another expat at my work place, but he just looked for temporary relationship before he moved to other country. He looked for sex not love.

    In my opinion:
    1. No faithful expats in Indonesia.
    2. Most of expats are not looking for true love, they only need sex.
    3. Expat in Indonesia never been serious to build serious relationship. They just want to play around and enjoying being a playboy.
    4. Expats in Indonesia think that it is easy for them to find girls, since many girls will look at them & show them that they are interested to know that expat.

    I have a friend (male) from Netherlands asked me when we walked at the mall, why many girls looked at him & smile. he was surprised because he told me that he is not a handsome man in Netherlands. No girls will look at him & smile :)

    Most of expats become snob because they treat special by girls in here. But you should known that a nice well educated career women will not easily give smile to a man whom they don't know on the street or at the mall, same like nice well educated career western women.
    5. An old expats also think that they still have charm for young girls. They usually need the young girl to take care of him in his retired age and to build their confidence that they still can date with young girls. Usually those girls are not well educated girls.
    6. Most of expats in Jakarta think that they are richer than people in Jakarta so they thought they can attract girls with their money, while the fact money is not everything for a good & honest girl, those girls looking for true faithful love.
    If a good faithful expats wants to meet a good faithful girls, here's the tips:
    1. Find a smart well educated girl who has a good job and has broaden mindset.
    2. Talk with her about her job, her vision & mission in life, situation in her country or in the world. If she only can talk about her bodies, her sexuality or your sexuality then she is not a kind of good girl in our general community.
    3. Find a girl who is not crazy to alcohol & clubbing (every weekend go to the club/bar). Most of well educated career women drink only in special occasion such as office party, friend's birthday, friend's anniversary, & wedding.
    4. Find a girl who is not wearing cheap sexy outfit when they go to the club/bar or mall.
    5. Find a girl who is not put a lot of make up when they go outside.
    6. Find a girl who is not smoking (maybe there are some smoking girls who are a good girl, but in our general community, girls are not smoking, that's not good for their image as a good girl).
    7. A good girl will have sex after she get married because it's taboo in our general community to have sex before married. Sex is only for her husband, as a present for a man who can win her heart.
    8. If you are religious (Christian/Catholic) and still believe in God, you can go to the church and join the youth community, so you will have a chance to meet a fun fearless woman but also still believe in God and knows the rules of God.
    I think I never found a good faithful & honest expats in Jakarta :)


    1. Well said.....glad someone can tell the truth like you...i am an indonesian girl too....and you are absolutely right.....

    2. Totally agree. Good girls are meant to be with good guys, and otherwise.

    3. Hi...I think somewhere you are true but all expat guys are not same. Someone like me believe in true relationship

    4. finally someone says church. well some good indonesian girls go to club and have parties too. me and my friends love parties so much to release stress after work. a 9 to 6 work is tough, and somehow deppressing . we wear sexy clothes as well without any intention to hookup, it's only how we fit to the occasion. no drugs no free sex. only dance and socialize, yet on the day after, we go to church. if they're lucky (meaning, can do the filter while in the bar), expats can meet these type of single ladies easily in jakarta. plenty of fish

    5. I'm a man. I never smoke, never get drunk, never once went to a nightclub, but I listen to Hardwell. I taught martial art to military, run 10 kilo per day minimum, own a company, just won government project, but I also love to watch latest anime and spend time with little cats and kittens. I love art, especially master paintings. I enjoy cooking, Korean and European dishes, and some desserts. I also write computer programs and work to help in bilateral negotiations. Yet, I am single. Never married. Met a few lovely women. Whenever I dressed well, they thought I'm a playboy. Whenever I wore my old shoes and forgot to brush my teeth they thought I'm a loser. Then there were those four or six girls who kept excusing themselves to talk on the phone while looking at me suspiciously.. called the bills, paid, left. I can't be bothered by women who aren't tactful or understand courtesy. See a western man, Asian women suddenly got curious and forgot the good man in front of them. Lucu sekali kalian. Hi hi hi..

    6. Interesting and intrigued me indeed. What do you mean us girls doesn't understand courtesy. If I were one of the four or six girls you mention above, I wouldn't have the gut to approach you but will give you the hint with eye contact hehehehe

    7. Well Said. I'm a Expat man and find truth in your words...

  4. Hi CC! I strongly agree with your opinion.

    In this earth, to find a good women/men is not based on where we meet them, but it is based on how well do you know their characters, and how compatible you are as partner.

    And to all:
    Did u know that Matt Damon met his current wife, Luciana Bozán Barroso, where she was working as a bartender? LOL!

    Well, you never know where you will meet your life partner.


  5. CC has cued where you guys can find her ;)

    third poster "6. Find a girl who is not smoking (maybe there are some smoking girls who are a good girl, but in our general community, girls are not smoking, that's not good for their image as a good girl)." - HEY, I smoke and I'm a very very good girl - it has got nothing to do with behaviour, love!

    You'll meet girls everywhere, what's the trouble?

  6. Hi, I'm a guy who lives in Australia. I agree, if a girl smokes, it very likely that she is low and with loose morals. In other words she is will be easy to attract and she will be asy target for sex.. Thats a fact. Most smart and educated men may go with them but only for sex, never for marriage. Besides, who wants to kiss an ashtray... only another ashtray.

  7. Hi, good article. Missed one place that u might meet Indonesian girls. If you are a golfer then in golf courses usually you have to play accompany by caddie. Most of the golf course using young girl caddie. I know many foreigner meet girl here and married her.

  8. Ok here i am to give a comment for post story. Its really so stranger words for me, about if expats meet women on bar, the women its not good women, and if expats meet women on wedding the women is good women. For u to know, i am indonesian women, sometimes i drinks alcohol, and sometimes i am smoking too, sometimes i am going to clubbing clubs, and my job sometimes i am working as event organizers and sometimes i am working as spa and massages therapist too. Now for all peoples know, THATS REAL ME, AND UNTILL NOW I STILL KEEP MY VIRGIN AND I STILL DONT LIKE MAKE SEX BEFORE I AM MARRIED. Pardon me, if that words its not rite ya, not all women whos love to go to clubbing clubs party its matrealistis or only thinking about to take money from expats. And not all women whos love go to mall so in love to see expats man and give a naughty smille ya. Jieeee i dont what i wanna saying again here. But i think we must to remember NO BODY PERFECTS ON THESE CRAZY WORLDS. So better dont to much blame or say not good to each others lah. IHHHHHHH CYAPEEEE DEHHHHHHH YEW CYINTTTTT!!!!!?

  9. Hi all, can we be all honest: there is no point to say indonesian girls are bad or not, pretty or not, more sex or not... Than in others countries.
    That's just a question of our behaviors, we, men. Or you look for sex and a prostitute working in a bordello, in a bar, in a spa will do it in jakarta's hot spot as it will do in any other country of the world. You pay for a service. That's not love searching... That's enjoying the moment with sex pleasure. There are plenty of occasion for that in jakarta and some others cities as indonesian guys love those place to have good time whatever their religion. But also because of the easy money those girls can do. If on top of that they find and old bule preferably, full pocket of dollars who can take care of her for some years, that's a bonus. Don't forget of the economic situation of indonesia ans half of population living with 2 dollars a day... Even of course under the spot lights of jakarta.
    But ya, indonesian girls are often good looking, sweet, pay attention... Somehow different with our very independent western girls, sweet during honey moon and becoming fat authoritarians cows soon.
    If you want something else with an indo girl while you are expats in this beautiful country, ya you are going to do as
    you will do everywhere in the west, flirting with some of them, there are plenty well educated, not at all easy to get access as it is said by miss cynic, educated girls usually can be a bit afraid with westerner. Imagine the culture shock... From the two perspective... Imagine how you live, not as expat in indo with everything is so easy but in your own country, have you imagine to bring back home in London, Washington, Paris... What will be your daily life with your bird of paradise... Living in indonesia her way, her traditions close with family and suddenly living by her own, in an appartment, alone, away from everything... With only you and your dollars...
    So do you want to go with prostitutes for sex, or long term love affair?

  10. If u want a good, faithful, smart, whatever girl in jakarta u should try to get urself hurt and take urself to the ER of the rumah sakit cipto mangunkusumo. You'll meet lots of (surprisingly) young, beautiful doctors. Lots of young med students, hell they are awesome!

  11. Everyone seems to have valid points here and I do agree with all views. However, I know it's true that there are a lot of Indonesian women who are money hungry, take drugs, steal, cheat and are shallower than a saucer. But so are Western womean, men, and Indonesian men. It's not about the race, sex, or even where the person hangs out at. It's who they are and how you connect with them. I know a lot of Western men who have married prostitutes and they have been married happily and faithfully for 30 years. I know loads of repectable and well educated Western and Indonesian men and women, who have cheated on their partners or have married for social or monetary wellbeing, and their marriages fail. So all I'm saying is that everyone's different. I party with all my girlfriends at different bars depending on what mood we're in lowies when we feel like being pretentious, ep/caz/bar, melly's, retro, x2 and many other random places(we even go to blok m sometimes when we're feeling extra silly and want to let our hair down and not be judged, even though we are by other men since we are the only western girls in the bar). It's hard being an expat/indo girl living in jakarta surrounded by men who seem to constantly be in a porn fantasy. We never know who to trust, who will respect you, and who wont hurt you (oh wait but that's what all women around the world worry about). Its also hard for an expat/indo guy to see all this temptation and not know which ones are good or bad apples (it's called restrain or just be bloody patient and dont jump the gun). Just remember it is hard for both sexes in Jakarta to find the right person because of all the shit storm stories about failed relationships and bad break ups but such is life... Dont give up and dont judge... now bye it's time to go out and have a few drinks with the girlies.

  12. I'm a Indo girl and i say the best way to meet an indo girl is to...
    1. have a indo friend so its easier to introduce.
    2. If your in a mall and got interested with a girl just give it a go, walk to them and talk.
    3. If your looking for the Good type of girl just look at the way she walks and talks. Never date an Indo girl who ask for money from you.
    Once she ask, run for your life haha

    P.s. I'm not insulting my own race its just there are a lot of betrayers, bimbo, gold digger out there... So beware!
    --Sf-- lovin my jakarta

  13. haha, finally someone who's honest! Can I meet YOU? You must be a GOOD girl giving a good advise to all the expats here.
    To be honest, we are not exactly a picnic ourselves and it's true: we do look for sex rather then a real relationship 99% of the time. So, who is ti blame for our tainted reputation? Ah, not the girls.
    However, this should not give them a right to use us a some sort of cash cow. So, both parties, beware!
    I think a good place to look are upscale areas, like Lippo Carawaci. I live here because of the proximity to CGK airport (I am a Lion Air pilot from UK) and with an expat pilot salary of approx 35mil per month, I feel like I'm the broke one here. You can meet lots of women here in Starbucks and other expensive by local standards coffee shops with brand-new $25000 MacBooks. They spend many hours here and seem to be of the similar social statue to us. Give it a try!

  14. I have traveled and worked all over the world from europe, asia, africa and america and when visiting a new place i look up blogs of this type.
    And everyone claims to have some sort of handy tips / secrets!!! of how to meet a "good" girl.
    Which appear to be exactly the same on different location!

    Guys its not rocket science.

    Approach it as if you were trying to meet someone back home. This could occur anywhere!!! Be realistic. But be confident.

    However just because some girl in a bar "finds you attractive" don't be delusional and let your ego get the better of you.

    I am 28 and find the dating process similar in any part of the world. Keeping the relation strong and happy well does anyone have the answer to that one. Try another blog hahaha

    Lastly if however your are looking for sex (GFE)ha then you know within 1 day were you need to go in any country. Thus i find most of these blogs amusing but not helpful.

  15. People looking for relationships, almost any kind can try dateinasia dot com. It offers free membership and I actually made a number of good friends from this site. 2 of those friends have become my NSA sex partners when in Jakarta.

  16. 4 notes : almost all indonesian girls are 'bitch'

  17. Mate that was too hard.
    Indonesian girls are good, probably you are looking in the wrong places.

  18. just be honest for ourself,coz i cant give advise or some tips how to get nice girls...if we are a good person it will be get nice person too..but sometimes when we go to a club or anyplace we get doktrin as indonesian girls a bad,matrealistic etc so we cant think a positive,so better is try to be honest for urself wat exacly u want when u meet the girls so u will knows the answer,we cant judge everybody especially indonesian girls,im indonesian woman coz i thing all in the world same have a bad girls and nice a nice and back to ourself...:)

  19. Hi all,
    I am an indo guy and been living in oz for 15 years now. From what i see, places don't determine whether the person you meet is good/bad and YES, that applies to any countries in any continents.... and YES, some indo girls are bad/manipulative/materialistics etc etc, however some others are good/educated/honest etc etc....and some can be a mix...
    and YES, oz girls are the same...some are bad n some are good.... as anonymous commented on 15/04/11, it is just the same where ever you are!

    @ all expats who live in indo: it is your right to do whatever you want, but remember that there is a limit, if you only want sex/fun/pleasure go find yourselves a working girl or "bad" girls... DO NOT "use"/"play" with the good ones coz you'll end up just hurting them....
    Just imagine if someone else does that to ur wife/daughter/sister?!

    One thing you gotta remember mate, DONT think that you are superior and can get anything/any girl you want! DONT assume that all girls (indo girls) want to be with you (for whatever reason)! Just like not all girls in your own country want to be with you!

  20. this is actually a pretty accurate article from my experience....
    i think most indonesian girls are materialistic, but not all... i found that the heritage i.e., what part of indonesia they or their family comes from also plays a large part. e.g, central java, have a rep for being quite calm, less materialistic, west java, play girls, Sulawesi, agressive and materialistic, medan (Batak) agressive.., and so on... i know that's very generic, but you ask just about any indonesia guy, and they tell you the same patterns.... central java usually comes up top on the list, followed by some chinese indonesians... however to be fair, i must also acknowledge it is true that 60-80% of bule men would play around in jakarta, so the odds are also difficult for indo girls to meet good foreign guys. I believe the key components looking for indo women, 1. Good education, 2. Already working and self sufficient (not potential or prospect) forget that.... 3. Social, without being an alcoholic or party girl, 4. Likes outdoors, can play a bit of sport, gym, something. 5. Can refrain from shopping and malls. 6. Not addicted to blackberry.
    If you find a girl like that, please let me know :) they are hard to come by... and the ones i have seen are taken.. There are serious bule guys looking for good indo girls, not just the old blok m types...

  21. Indonesian girls are just as choosy and just as materialistic as Western girls (big surprise). It is just a bit easier for the handsome and young western guys to get them in bed as compared to the girls in their hometown because Asian girls don't have the same hangups about sex as their Western sisters.
    Some Western guys are status symbols in Jakarta but those guys are mostly the tall and younger bule, if a bule is fat and old he is also perceived as a status symbol (or so you want sex symbol) but that has more to do with his dompet then his looks. But there are exceptions because Indonesian girls are very sensitive to Charisma, meaning confidence and good manners, and knowing how to treat and talk to the girls will woo them, that is the main reason why so many old and fat guys can score hot and sexy girls in Jakarta, it is not only about money.

    That last part is exactly the difference between Western and Indonesian girls, Western girls would almost never give in to fat guys with charisma, because they are not able to overcome the looks part, Indonesian girls can.

    And average looking western guys who are not tall have an even harder time to score girls here believe me.... For them it is just as difficult as back home (unless they are desperate enough to go for the fat mammas).

    So even though everybody claims that if Indonesian girls melt when they see a bule that is not true, there are so many bule nowadays in Jakarta that it is getting boring to look at them (an indonesian girl living in Kemang told me), especially in most parts of Jakarta like Kuningan, Kemang, Senayan, central Jakarta where many bule work and live. You will still get some attention if you are just average looking in parts like Tangerang and Bekasi because there are not so many bule there but in most parts of central or south Jakarta a bule is nothing special anymore, unless you are tall and handsome then you will still receive shitloads of attention, but you would probably then also get lots of attention in your own country from the fairer sex.

    Looks count just as much in Indonesia and back home and don't think Indonesian girls think every bule looks the same (they cannot differentiate between bule) they perfectly know if a bule is handsome or average looking or ugly.

  22. " Good girls are usually quite shy to be seen with foreigners in public and they will probably be a little distant, especially in front of their friends"
    It was me :), i have to explain a lot of times to my french boyfriend (now, he's my husband:)) if i'm not comfortable to be kissed or kissing in public area, even just holding hand, i don't want do that :))
    Listen to your brain, but follow your heart :)

    Bon courage à tous!

  23. lol lmao hahahaha.
    Pls stop arguing ppl. dont fight.
    if y'all already know the the truth and lie about human, so be smart.
    Thanks fo sharing too, its gud knowledge.
    But not all indonesian are bad girl.

    -me indonesian girl-

  24. Sorry but its tempting to say..
    most of western guy only interest in thats the fact lol.
    i bet no virgin left of western ppl.

  25. if you go to a bar.. you'll find a girlie bar..

    go find n catch her on the Church or Office..

    that's it...!!

  26. I am one of evil expats..but not a western.

    Maybe when this writer wants to buy sex, he also expects any intimacy from the women. Surely intimacy will make games more exciting. But, Don't..... To be frank, most of male expats are not AVAILABLE. Already has his own wife. Don't try to find good girls in here just to satisfy your emotional hunger.

    One more, when you buy sex in here because of hunger, do not become a stingy prince. Pay enoughly. Women in the bar need money. And we need to have something to restrain yourself. When you see your empty wallet, you may think of your families again. We need something to make us restrain ourselves here in this temporary stay.

    If you are hungry, eat something... But do not complain with your makanan...

  27. I'm an expat who had been running a biz in jakarta for 8 years. i would like to say something good about jakarta girls. i'm married in my homeland of course. a few years ago i hired some spg for my biz n one of them fell in love with me. we went out n she gave me her virginity. i was not ready for her as i was still stabilising my biz at that time. i broke her heart n she left me. 3 years ago i heard from a friend that she got married n already had kids. i miss her so much but same time i am happy that she is now a happily married woman. so u guys out there, i juz have something to say, if u r ready and serious, u will meet a good girl but do me a favour, do marry her n not make the mistake i did. because if i were to be given a chance again i would hv married her and give her a good n stable life.

  28. I find this post is outrageous. I'm a married Indonesian woman (love my black American husband to bit), have lived abroad for half my life and just recently returned to live in Jakarta. When I first got involved in Indo community in the Middle East, this was exactly what I thought about my own people. Uneducated, materialistic, and just out to marry a foreigner no matter how stupid/annoying/ugly/fat/old he is. But then...I thought and thought about it, hah,,,There are just as many materialistic Western females, they are not that different, it's just their ways are more subtle than these Indo (semi)working girls. Their methods are usually: act like an understanding/charming/fun girlfriend while desperate for her rich banker bf to marry her, pop a baby as soon as possbile, and then of course, hire a shark attorney and win the lottery a.k.a divorce settlement. PS: to say Indonesian women who like clubbing are "bad" girls is just plain dumb and ignorant. I've partied all over the world, yet I am a multi-linguist, I have two master degrees, wrote theses on subjects I'm sure you (the blogger) have no idea about. So beat it, will ya!

  29. There are a lot of argumentation that based on what their experience and feel comfortable to share with, let us see the different perspective about this... Man and Woman are human being who needs to be loved, care and fulfill their needs...

  30. People. A blog that speak about place to' go out is ok but when Bule start to' judge local girls/man it is alzo offensive! Im an expat but im not trying to' say which girls Are best or worst. I just take all of them here....... Withot to' judge. To' the F. French blogger here: get a life man!

  31. we all have different opinions about indonesian girls. i am one of them, and i feel like i am taking the downside also from this stereotyping. not all indo girls are gold diggers. most of them are, but that doesn't mean that we all are. some of us actually want to get to know a guy without actually being labeled or judged first. and sometimes we don't really care if he's an expat or not as long as they make us comfortable.

    all gold diggers all over the world are similar. even us girls can tell within first impression which one is a gold digger and which one is not from a group of girls. i know you guys can also do that and therefore will stop generalizing that all indo girls are materialistic.

    hope you expat guys will find a nice decent girl out there. good luck, you need it a lot more than you think ;)


  32. This is total garbage. Why would anyone who wants to meet the right spouse come here for advice? If you're married and you're here to find love, you got another thing coming. If you're single, what you find here is what you initially thought it was. Don't deceive yourself thinking otherwise.

  33. Seems people are in self defense mode... I am an expat and have friends both female and male locally as well .You can find a good person after knowing them well. First meet can be dangerous to predict though clothing and talking often says a lot of person character. Being Single and 2 months in country--I tried parties/clubbing/social and so called shopping but felt one need more time to know a person to move ahead with a life commitment

    My comments coming from being an Asian British ...


  34. good indonesian girls will not go to the same place as the expats. they will go to the latest most happening place in town in which after it has become the last year place along came the ecpats and their "entourage".
    good indonesian girl will not be attracted to expats who acted like they're so superior from all these third world countries ladies..
    good indonesian girls will for sure check your financial background to ensure they can maintain their standard of living after you take them back to your countries.. we're so accustomed to having our maids and chaffeur ready 24/7.. why would we sacrifice all the privileges an luxury we can get in jakarta and trade it to a life full of house cleaning, maid-less, nanny-less, and public transport life..
    there you go.. if you want to get good, smart, and classy ladies.. you have to be classy as well.. or else as people said.. you pay peanuts.. you get monkeys..

  35. German guy married to "Kampung" girl and HAPPY!December 5, 2011 at 7:36 PM

    So, for you a "good" Indonesian girl is a rich Indonesian girl.

    You don't think an expat and an Indonesian girl from a poor background can be happy together?

  36. Indonesian girls that i know is a good girls, they didn't do free sex, they never ask for money to Indonesian guys or foreign guys, they act really polite and gently, educated, attractive, religious and they like to party, drink, smoke some weed (sometimes), go to the bars and clubs but they are not sluts! they just love to enjoy their life..

    thats the kind of normal, young, single Indonesian girls that i know.. thats me and my friends :) u could meet us at bars, clubs, university, library, mosque, church, malls, salon, Jakarta, Bandung, or Bali.. everywhere :)

    1. Smoking weed in Indonesia? That's something I would never ever try no matter how much anyone tries to convince me. No thanks! I'd rather be patient and go smoke in a different country.

  37. So Far I know about expat in Indo, they mostly look for short term relationship and sex oriented. Therefore guys you will only meet material and cheap girl outdoor. Because you first attract to their body and looks;)

  38. every one got their own mentality, can`t justify or decide based on a single girl you had met in any part of the world.. if one is bitch you cant directly decide all the girls are bitches in that location ... so most of your conversation looks like you are searching a girl for a short term relation may be an hour or day . willing to have for life time.. am giving a hell bye to you .

  39. I'm wondering, was the autor found a good girl as his advice-where to found, and you marrying her or only for sex?

  40. wow that's a pretty tough opinion and on Indonesian girls! :) also the generalization on types of girls based on where they hang out. oh well, to know good girls, 1st thing 1st - are you also good enough?. you would (probably) attract girls of pretty much the similar qualities to you. so don't whine too much when you got some really harsh experiences with them. look at yourself, evaluate your attitude, then be nice :) cheers & good luck!

  41. oh come on, this is just an article written by a foreigner who don't know every single thing about Indonesians or even Jakartans. Don't really use this as your guide.

    I used to think that foreigners were in someways better than locals. And then I started to knew some not-really-good-almost-bastard foreigners, which made me change my thought about them. Well they can say whatever they want about locals, it's their rights. Cause when Indonesians go to other countries, we'll also have the bad thoughts about locals. And whoever wrote "when Bule start to' judge local girls/man it is alzo offensive!" I totally agree with you man! And that's great to know there's still some sane foreigners.
    Anyway, for me, where/when ever you meet the girl, it always depends on you both. YOU ARE WHAT YOU GET :D -best luck!

    (17 indonesian girl)

  42. It is not easy to find a good expat (male) in jakarta, as mentioned above that 60-80% male expat are looking for sex. So, not love or relationship. And mostly they are married too.

    Indonesian girls, if you like bule man, you better find them in their home country. It is much easier for you to find a man whose well mannered, gentleman, better educated, non sexist, SAME AGE or even younger (!) and not snob (for just being a 'bule').

    Expat woman, lots of indonesian male that are nice. In general, indonesian male are a patient man, tolerant, loyal and treated you like a lady. Find them in the right place/community.

    Good luck!

    1. But indo man, has that women they married at home, cooking and cleaning. That man,is out having sex all night and day with other girl

  43. i believe this author wrote this article just from one point of view, which is his...
    if you try to find some decent woman no matter its indonesian, asian , kaukasian or etc...i think all the woman have same personality and it can be found in many countries..

  44. Hi..nice blog u had here.. I'm just curious though.. where can I find some japanese girl in Jakarta? i want to learn their culture and becoming their friends.. any good japanese girl here in Jakarta? thanks all :)

  45. To find love you have to be ready to give love. Keep your eyes open about character most certainly, but remember love is a two way street and an investment.

    Yes, many very decent girls also come from poor families. It's called character.

    It is easy for relatively rich men to find empty sex in any city, but it is up to individuals to decide what they really want and stick to their values.

  46. Hi there,

    Why dont you guys realise that MOST of expats / Bule(s) who come to work in Indo cause they couldnt have a good job in their own countries.

    Most of them are poor and lonely guy who is taking advantage of their foreign currency.

  47. @last poster - what a load of nonsense!

  48. HAHAHA so interested read all of comments above ! I'm indonesian mixed chinese . I have a good education, i will finished my Bachelor next year and continue to Degree.i can make my own many and never asked my bf for money too, Even if im still at univ but sometimes i paid my bf for hangout, dinner, or lunch or buy him an expensive gift and We are balance of that. Because i know a good girls is not asking money from her BF or Man. They have an attitude and a good background also that's why they are not asking for money because it would be make a bad reputation. im an independent , Im Not Party holic But i like party sometimes and I'm not Alocoholic but i like drink also sometimes, I Like Travelling, going to GYM, going to Library . and i Have many Bule friends. one of my best friend from NY (bule) said many expat here just wanna have sex because actually in their countries he's not handsome, he's alone in indo and indo is like a heaven for expat. But even if for the end the expat can fall in love and decided to marry indonesian Girl .
    I'm 22 years old and my bf is from australia and he's 37 . we met in the club at Bali. Who know how it goes ? i read some comment above that old bule like young girl like me and maybe take and advantage from young girl for sex? i dont think all of old bule are like that. Why i wanna be with my Bf now, because he's my criteria who has a good education and good job , good atitude also.i dont wanna have bf which doesnt have a good education or bad in a attitude.

    one Things everyone should know, We are different culture. I just learned how communication between culture and it is not easy to relationship with different culture even if in the same culture also sometimes get argue. conclusion of the Problem relationship between culture (indonesia & white)is Stereotype, Racism,judgment, Point of view .

    almost of comments above is about stereotype , why they think bule like that , indonsian woman like this and bla bla bla because of they are classifying an experience about a group of people .

    stereotype happen when someone classifying an experience about a group of people and make it happen as a guidance.

    The problem is not only for expat in indo , but also Everywhere people who relationship between culture .

    SO, not all indonesian women are matre or poor. not all western come to indo also just wanna have fun. not all american are arrogant. not all australian in bali are rude. not all western woman are independent.

    Peace and Love ya
    kisses xxx

  49. Hello all,
    First of all I found the title of this article is kind of annoying for me Indonesian woman. Nowadays it is still difficult to accept there are many stereotyping of Jakarta woman. Excuse me I'd prefer the term woman than girls. What I learned about expats, some of them are good, respectful, polite, well educated, and open minded, who are not prejudice or being stereotyping to Indonesian woman in general. But the other one, who are narrow minded, hypocrite, fake, prejudice, cold & selfish, with white superiority or just pure chauvinist. The second type is that really annoying. Same thing with the girls/woman/ladies too. In other parts, the fact there are some girls/woman who likes to hangs out or playing hteir game to get what their wants in term of security, money, sex.. I think it is not just in Jakarta only. Maybe here, we have the so called openness toward new culture, easily adapt, and friendly but don't missunderstand that. Eventhough maybe you experienced "the too friendly go scary" situation you are a grown man/woman, you know which one who are wrong/right, and don't blame it on others, just take a look at yourself, were you join the club or leave it as it was? There are respectful woman, cultured, freedom lover, broad minded, friendly, intelligent, career seeker, ambitious, and outgoing, yet still have traditional value and eagerness to have serious relationship until married without have intention to rip someone or to taking advantage. Basically both men & woman in general have their needs for security, to be love, companionship, partnership who can be lovers, and friends too. So let's go back to our roots, our nature, don't get so easily distracted by the instant glamours, or superficial stuffs.
    At the end of the day it is always goes back to us, and there's no need for judging / blaming. Indonesia have a very strong culture, I am proud of Indonesia and the woman also the men and thousand years of rich diversity of culture and its beautiful nature.Find deeper, think wiser, look closer, and no matter what keep true to yourself and be respectful always! and then you may find the true soulmate, whether it is Indonesian, or foreigner.

  50. Don't understand why most unopenmind Indonesian woman want to married Bule. The most open mind Indonesian woman or girl knows that living overseas with their bule is a disaster.

    Dear Indo woman or Girl,
    Go married with Bule as long as they have a commitment to stay in Indonesia for the rest of his life ...

  51. Wow! Whole lot of anonymous geniuses. March 19th takes the cake... now that's a special kind of idiot. There is a kernel of truth in there somewhere though, in that we Bules don't actually shit money.

  52. Lucid post. Basically, it's just like meeting girls back home. Except that back home, you don't really have the problem of filtering out the bad ones because they don't pay any attention whatsoever to you (I'm using the generic "you" here, no one specific). While at home you're just a normal-looking, broke, random guy, in Indonesia you're a sex symbol, you're rich, and everyone wants to know you, so suddenly all the hot chicks are after you. The trick is to ask yourself, "If this girl was in , would she be interested in me?".

  53. It is not easy for me to meet Indonesian girls. No i am not Indian (although the indian guys i know are all doing extremely well with the girls) i am a bule guy from Belgium and 39 years old. For some reason the girls that i am attracted to are never attracted to me but the girls that i am totally not attracted to are often attracted to me. So if i go to a club, be it Dragonfly or Red Square, my usual hangouts, the only girls that are into me are the older owerweight women or sometimes the flat out hookers.

    In malls i never receive any looks or smiles from girls so i don't try my luck there because i don't believe in approaching girls that ignore me.

    I am member of a number of dating sites targeting Indonesia, and there the same thing happens to me as in clubs, only the old fat mammas send me interests and winks and messages, to be deleted right away

    If i see a girl that is my type i will send her a message but 95% are not replied, the 5% that reply me often ask me if i can intro them to my bule friends, or they just send a nonsense reply, very few actually engage in conversation with me and i rarely get a date from sites.
    This used to be different however, 7 or even 4 years ago it was very easy to meet pretty Indoneesian girls from dating sites.
    I think this has to do with the growing number of bule guys that are using these sites to find girls, because nowadays probably 30% of the members of the average dating site is a bule.

  54. I lived in Jakarta for 3 months and stayed at the Ascott (behind grand Indonesia) in late 2010 and found that very few girls went to teh gym to workout. Fortunately they are "naturally slim" although there were a lot of overweight ones.

    The office was next to Jaya pub and let me tell you this: Being an expat, drinks cost more here than in Thailand or Malaysia even in some places more than Singapore, ridiculous. Girls were good but took a while to get to know one.

  55. I don't understand the comments about free sex being bad. Free sex should be the only type of sex. If men and women both enjoy sex then why should it have a price tag attached? Some women think, even if they enjoy sex, the need to get something for it. That's ridiculous and I would definitely avoid any woman with that kind of attitude.

    Also I would never date a woman who expects me to wait until marriage for sex. What about sexual compatibility? How can I know if we are sexually compatible for marriage if we don't do it until we're married? Crazy.

    Finally, I want to say I'm a white UK guy planning to move to Indonesia to teach English. I only want a serious relationship so I found the blog educational and helpful. However, I must say I would make considerably more money in my own country and I have no problem dating women there. But I like life in Asia and the women but I've had problems meeting good ones. So, again, thanks.

    I think

  56. @uklothario
    How can I know if we are sexually compatible for marriage if we don't do it until we're married? Crazy.
    How can you guarantee that you will marry her after she gave her body to you.
    IMHO,good one rightfully should only give you after marriage.Those who let you try before marriage are taking a high risk and I dun think she is good one .Also you may be wrong if you think you will have no problem dating woman just because you have money.
    Nothing surprising that you have problem meeting good one because Asian woman thinking is different from the West.I am poor and is also looking for good one but I think I stand a better chance.

  57. I disagree with you Agongkia. First of all, very few woman are interested in a man who doesn't have a good job and/or money. I wish it wasn't true, but it is.

    Secondly, I think you are talking about virgins. I'm not interested in virgins. I prefer sexually experienced women. We both need to experience sex before marriage. If we can't have good sex, we can't have a good marriage. It's important for both of us. Of course, there is no guarantee I will marry her or she will marry me. But I can guarantee I would never, never marry somebody who wants to wait until marriage to have sex.

    When I said ""

  58. @uklothario
    Oh..I thought earlier you mentioned that you want a serious relationship .
    With preference for sexually experience women and want sex before marriage without guarantee of marrying her,back lane is the best choice.You need not travel far and most of these are experience and can handle even up to 4 man per hour.
    Happy searching.

    1. Sexual compatibility! Do you know what it is?

  59. Of course I want a serious relationship and I don't want to visit prostitutes. I want a sexually liberated woman. You seem to be saying it's impossible to find in Indonesia. Maybe you're right. I will find out soon when I visit Jakarta.

  60. Wow! I found this topic and discussion is very fascinating. I live in Jakarta and I work with many expats.
    I find it hard to deny that dating a 'bule' (white/westerner/ caucasian...whatever)is very desirable to many Indonesian girls for some motives. Even my friends think I'm stupid because I have been working for 7 years with many expats from many countries but not marry to one (well, I dated one but it didn't work).
    Many people that I know have a stupid idea that 'bule' men are smarter, more good looking, richer, more caring and more romantic than Indonesian men. Plus if one marry to a bule, they will have cute babies. Of course I'm so sad to hear this. It's very shallow and degrading.
    This shallow idea explains why many girls are easily throwing themselves at expats without any further consideration. They become clingy, needy, cheap, materialistic and men eater. They have set way too much of expectation. And I think, this has become a pattern that is noticed by expats. As normal men, at first they really enjoy the situation. They can get laid easily with a good deal. And the problem rises when the girl wants more serious commitment a.k.a married, in the name of religion and culture. There it goes, comes the frustrating drama. The relationship turns into nightmare and they become jerk to each other. And yes, I heard this situation a lot.
    I have an American friend. He's 30 something. Quite good looking, has a good job and sociable. He attracts many Indonesian girls and so proud of it. Back in his home town, he's just average guy. He didn't date a lot of girls. But here, he's a player. He changes girl every week. I don't blame him, because HE CAN. He's snob now. My concern is, he always dates wrong girls. A girl who just wanted his money, a girl who tried to blackmail him, a girl who lied to him over and over again, and I don't have any idea who's next. He keeps complaining about this but neither changes the pattern of picking a girl, nor his behavior. Who's stupid now?
    My point is, finding a good woman to be in a good relationship with and possibly love, depends on your maturity. If you are a mature guy who knows exactly what you want in a woman or in a relationship, being cautious and respectful, I'm sure you'll find a very high quality single Indonesian woman :).
    To me, a good man is just a good man. No matter what his race or ethnicity is. And I'm sure that intelligent, smart, open minded women will think the same. Good luck.:)

  61. uklothario: : "free sex" here in Indonesia means PRE / EXTRA MARITAL SEX. Free as in "why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free".

    I'm an Indonesian woman, and of course very much in touch with the current indonesian culture (although I went to school and worked in the US for a decade, and just came back 2 years ago). I can confidently say that GOOD INDONESIAN GIRLS/WOMEN DON'T SLEEP WITH GUYS THEY'RE NOT MARRIED TO!! When they do it's referred to A MISTAKE!! BIG BIG POTENTIALLY LIFE RUINING MISTAKE!

    As how do you know it's a good fit if you don't have sex before marriage: IF YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE MISSING, YOU'RE NOT MISSING ANYTHING =)

    PS: I'm a happily married woman, not a bitter perawan tua (bitter old virgin). I just have a feeling someone is going comment on my being one.

    1. Sexual compatibility honey! What do you do if you keep your virginity for marriage and then you realise that your dear husband can't satisfy you sexually? You will find someone who can fuck you really hard. That's why sexual compatibility is very important!

  62. @uklothario
    See?Who says JKT dun have good woman.This one can consider a good one.This is the type I am looking for .But....too bad ,she is married.

  63. regarding bule who are average looking is for me funny.Hollywood has brain washed the Asian girls in that all bule guys are handsome and Holly wood also helped they idea via films like Karate Kid, Dancing with wolves that the white man is there to save the local women from savages.And as long the local women cheaply throw them selves in front of bule it will only spur the thought of player stigma to a bule(which is regarded for young single men as a compliment)

  64. well, I'll be in Jakarta next week. So it will be interesting to see what life is really like there. I'm checking out the city to see if I want to live and work there. At the moment, I live in Mongolia.

    Thanks about the explanation of what free sex means. Well, for me, free sex is good and married sex is good. I don't see that one is better than the other. But definitely I would never marry a woman without having sex with her first. That's a very old-fashioned idea and I'm modern.

  65. well, I'll be in Jakarta next week. So it will be interesting to see what life is really like there. I'm checking out the city to see if I want to live and work there. At the moment, I live in Mongolia.

    Thanks about the explanation of what free sex means. Well, for me, free sex is good and married sex is good. I don't see that one is better than the other. But definitely I would never marry a woman without having sex with her first. That's a very old-fashioned idea and I'm modern.

  66. just enjoy yourself life to fullest! you might end 6feet under!

  67. woah... found this site while browsing for resto & Cafe review.. a fascinating side (its always fun to see things from lots of prespective)

    to give background, im Indonesian male late 20 with monthly salary of USD 3K.. so i guess i can represent myself as the so called middle classed one in Indo, and have circulate in various bars, cafe, resto to look at this intresting phenomenon..

    its amaze me regarding this bule and Indonesian (girls) relationship.. i think it is common preception here that u wont get a nice girl in a bar.. if u expatsss want to have a good wife or girlfriend why not ask your indonesian colleague to hook u up.. im sure they are more than happy to introduce u one.. Indonesian people are "Kepo" (noisy / curious) about other persons relationship.

    if u dating one of those bar girls, fell in love and sucked dry (in terms of material not FLUID) then it is ur own downfall dude..

    the majority of indonesian girls are really nice, and will fall to a really wife category (of course if you can surpass the cultural differences) these type of "worker" girls only give bad image for the Indo girls in an overall matters.

    and one curious question why bulee (westerners) always pick the ugliest girls by Indonesian standards ?, it always amaze mee!

    -Average Joe-

  68. LOL @ average Joe in "pick the ugliest girls by Indonesian standards"

  69. @average joe
    Me ,an asian from a tiny red dot,too also prefer the ugliest girls and its nothing surprising.
    Pretty one may comes with higher risk.Not all but sometimes some may tend to be bossy as they have more choices.Those ugliest one will treasure me more since I am the few who is not particular in her look.You should also consider to choose the ugliest one and many are ugly but have a kind and understanding heart.Saya cinta Jelek,buruk .Muahh...

  70. I've read half of all comments, and for God's sakes it gets dull like hell. Just live your life normally, people! Why you get so bothered by that such thing unless you desperately need to be loved because you're going to die tomorrow. Cheers.

  71. Hi, i'm a young attractive indonesian female,...i just wanna say, some of indonesian Girl like to have a foreign man for being couple , is because they usually more open minded and some really respect what the Girl Think about, and not too dominant like some of their eastern brothers..;) its not only about look or money :)... I have few foreign man for friends, some are polite and kind, respectfull, some are just focus only to see the girls Body, hahaha ha... I usually spent My time to gym at fitnessfirst on oakwood apartment, Kuningan , and Every sunday Visit Icws church at bellagiomall... I just like to meet some Nice foreign gentleman,..first to be Friend..but Who can predict the end? :)

  72. How I wish I could find a Mariana Renata Dantec duplicate ~

  73. I have lived in Indonesia for several years and can attest that there are many fine women here. Women being pegged as 'materialistic' is ubiquitous - especially in Singapore! Overall, the Indonesian women are quite sincere and loyal. However, many expat friends of mine have been eaten alive and bankrupted by women they fell for in Ayam bars.. One needs to be careful and be 'sober' before falling in love - true in any country.

  74. men eater are everywhere just be very careful

  75. So amusing you dont only find bad girls in the clubs. Also amusing to see the (indonesian girls) opinion that good girl equates no sex!

    Me I like fooling around, i truly enjoy it. If a girl wont be affectionate with me in public then I'm not getting from the relationship what i NEED. I've found partying fun loving girls in the clubs in Jakarta from all walks of life, from poor background, to middle class, to upper class, to jet-setter.

    Whilst the girls from the poorer backgrounds may actually like you for who you are (I think this is often genuinely the case) the economic aspect helps. Personally I always insist they pay for as many drinks as I do, though I'll sometimes spring for the entrance fee, this eliminates the gold diggers.

    It is not that i equate a good girl with a rich girl, however i do equate an intersting girl with a higly educated one. For this, good english is usually a good indicator.

    So for me if I find a fun girl in a club, whos willing to pay for her own drinks, can communicate well in english (or other languages!) then she is a potential keeper.

    I'll (anonymously) admit that if she is very pretty I will happily bang her brains out, but never under false pretenses. I always make it pretty clear that im only passing through and not looking for a relationship. Nevertheless I've dated doctors, models, tour-guides, med-students, and secretaries here. You will meet girls from all layers of society everywhere. You just have to be more picky in the clubs if you want to restrict yourself to any particular layer.

  76. go to pesantren, then you will meet many good girl hehehehehhhh..

  77. I am Indo girl that studied in the Europe, dating bules and indo men has no much different I can tell, especially if he lived overseas or has tons of cash I even found them worse! regarding their attitude to sex..

    I think the issues today is managing your expectations, there always somebody for somebody
    Fat sleazy bules with prostitutes
    Good bules with good Indo ladies
    Average looking bules with average looking indo ladies

    Very important notes for those people that ever got hurt by either manipulatives hot indo girls or hot manipulatives bules that only want to get laid...

    there are still tons of good single people in Jakarta that waiting to be found or search! just be patience, they can be anywhere in chamber events, in the clubs, at the gym etc

    Good luck

  78. what?
    is everybody here WANTS to make (love)sex upon the same time EXPECTING to be regarded as "a good one"?
    oh, is it your dream-in-motion i see?

    wake up y'all.

    if the value is social-view, money and respect is easy to related. from a poor-perverted woman to even a beautiful lady with high educated and altitude would love to make relations with a rich-and-lovely guy. that's the fact, basic instinc.

    but if the added value is a religious one, than you'll find it deeper from just to make love-and-regarded.

    just to make it easy to understand, be fun if you want to make fun, but you need to be a better one of you want to have a really-good person beside you.
    doesn't matter it's an indonesian, european or african, it's just a basic instinc inside that social relations to value. instinc to have fun, to have wealth, and to feel secure.

    if you don't have that secure feelings to offers, why bother (the others)?

  79. I find the comment is interesting on the views about Indonesian women in generals. I am an Expat from Asian countries been to many times in Indonesia and many parts of Asian countries and in and out of the bars and club for a very long time even in Europe and US. Expat ant Indonesian men don't have a respect to Indonesian women, everyone thinks that everything Indonesian should be cheap and can be bought over the counter. This retarded mentality should be changed.

  80. Good or bad girls can't be judged based on their bad habits of smoking or places they hang out.
    That is just too shallow minded...
    But best bets to meet them are everywhere!
    You can just tell by how they act, class is something that you can't buy!
    I personally found a smoking woman with their pointy heels are sexy.

  81. i am a 21yo indon girl. i don't smoke, don't drink, will graduate next year in a University, i'm a virgin, and not a gold digger. and yes we are still exist. we might appear as rigid person but if we are close personaly, u will find out that we also have a secret naughty mind. I haven't visited club, but my curiousity will take me there after the exam week is done hahaha.

    i had a caucasian bf for 2 years and few months. our relationship didn't work but i'm still interested with caucasian. why? to be honest i love their looks, not judgemental and good listener. but hey I'm not being racist here because i become friends with anyone.

    1. Then you should date me. I'm looking for someone exactly your profile and I'm ready to settle. Very comfortable financially, willing to introduce you to the great aspects of life as long as you are smart and interesting. Live in Bali, own my own company, come to Jakarta every month, fed up with the so so girls.

    2. Are you still single? Finding a girl like you in jakarta is like winning the jackpot

  82. hello anonymous who wrote in november 14! i would like to date you ;p

  83. Another one that id like to add :

    - Homestay
    Homestay is a better choice for expat with romantic-missions rather than rent a house or stay in a hotel. By staying in a local citizen's home youre not gonna just understand their culture. Middle class Indonesians are very family-minded, by staying under the same roof with them for a long time you'll be considered as part of family, then you can have opportunity to meet your hosts' relatives and friends, and their relatives/friend's relatives and friends, so on like a neverended viral marketing.

  84. @anon 8.56
    Need to find out whether its against the local law for home stay before recommendation.
    By staying in a local citizen's home,one indirectly cause inconvenience to the host and especially one is of different nationality.Neighbour may gossip and there is a possibility that police may turn up and one or the host may be fine.Dun cause inconvenience to others.Rent a house or stay in hotel is better.
    Not all countries are suitable for homestay.

  85. i dont date expats, i was really interested dating an expat but apparently they dont like about my believe about sex after marriage. i know its so traditional, very christian, but thats what i believe . and most of expats thinks i have medieval mind

  86. a good website to meet nice girls in jakarta is

    1. I tried going on there and there's only 2 posting, have anyone here tried BP yet? It looks promissing

  87. Hi all!
    I'm an Indonesian girl, my name is Anggi and I'm 19 years old. Tomorrow night, 8 pm at DragonFly Jakarta, there's a NYE Celebration with a BANG! EDM's rising star Gregori Klosman. I have 2 free entries, too bad I haven't found any companion, yet. Is there anyone out here interested with this and planning to go with me? if there is, just let me know by invite my pin BB: 20f3427d or my phone number: 083873147080. I'm really looking forward a companion. Uhm actually, I'm looking for a bule one, a good one and a nice one guy to go with me.

    Thankyou, cheers! xx

  88. and now i want to know where should find a good expat ? who's not looking for sex only ?

    i see in bars & cafes many bule are naughty. sometimes it makes me feel disturb with their attitude.

    so dont judge that indonesian woman is only divide by 3-4 type of woman. you still not search enough where is good girl are.

    im indonesian girl living & working in jakarta, well educated, have a good jog as business development thats why i sometimes go to bars with my customers/friends.
    come on lets talk maybe we have something in common

  89. Mr Sexual Compatibility, have you ever had a conversation with a woman who didnt ask for your credit card details ? No question that many people go out looking for sex, but we aren't all knuckle-draggers like your good self. Let's try to keep this discussion slightly above navel level, shall we ?

  90. man eaters... oh please. nah, don't act like men are innocent or something. you flame those indo women... do you think men are innocent???! why do many expats speak like they're victims who are eaten by indo women? we are women hunters too. that's why we travel oversea. aren't we the ones who are never satisfied ? if you hate love or marriage, then you don't deserve. just find a girl to fuck without love and be responsible on what you did (spend money). i want sex and more women.. as you do too. now stop complaining and start watching porn. oops i forgot you already did.

  91. I agree with some comments here. Im an Indonesian girl, 21yo and from what i see n my own experiences, most western here in Jakarta only looking for fun not a relationship. I thought i was a good girl, i have a nice job, never ask money, trusted him, but he was just fucking around behind me. Well guess i was just unlucky and he was just not that into me but i was too blind to see hahah. Anyway nice blog mate!

  92. Artista, if it's any consolation, it happens all over the world - and I guess you knew that. The irony is that it's often the guys who make the most noise about it when it happens to them. Keep the faith.


  93. Goodmorning Jakarta :)!!

    I will be tavelling alone to Jakarta in the midst or end of May.. I think I will stay 1 week in Jakarta and do some sightseeing there and also have a glimpse of the (famous) nightlife there, before I head up to Yogja and Bali.
    As I will be alone in Jakarta I was wondering if there is a nice and decent girl (please no prostitute) who would accompany me and show me the highlights of Jakarta?
    I'm 32, origin (mixed Italian/Dutch, living in the Netherlands. If anyone is interested please let me know and I will leave my emailadress behind!

  94. why do everything must be so complicated haha. I'm a woman, I'm a virgin, I'm not drink or smoke a lot but i think judge people easily by where did you meet them is not fair, life of a person too long to judge on the first sight lol. if you attracted,just talk to her, get to know her deeper, thats all! you guys much more understand to know which one is the best for you right ;)

  95. Hi Traveller...
    Would be nice to accompany you and show you Jakarta.

    I am living in Jakarta until august i think. I need to have some fun, but too busy with work.

    Hope that when you are here i will be free.

    For sure, agree with you, no prostitute.

    Please leave me your email.


    1. Hi Jakarta,

      I'm an Australian guy, early thirties, been living in Jakarta for about a year now. I generally live a pretty relaxed lifestyle when I'm not travelling for work, so haven't met many locals and made good friends. So I'm doing something about it and asking anyone interested who wants to hang out, practise our foreign languages have a laugh. I generally don't hang out in bars here, been there done that all the world over, but all the same open to any invitations. Anyone interested? Feel free reply, Easy Going Guy,


  96. i am in Jakarta on tuesday for 2 nights... during daytime i work but in the evening i want to enjoy the nighlife. Is there any Local girl who wants to join me... good dressed and sexy.. not to sexy. i am swiss - my age 44, my acting like 40 and my style like 36 lol. You like good food, wine and like to laugh for 48 hours... let me know. bin hug

  97. ok guys i wanna offer u some ways how to find good girl.
    listen many girls maybe say i still virgin. but sometimes they just lie. eventhough they virgin not all of them are reallly nice. but if u are looking for marriage
    maybe u should try to a small village bcus the more ooportunity for find a good girl. traditional. mostly of them very loyal to their husband.
    but the bad things is. not much of them they can speak english.

    but if u wanna meet girls for the city. its really hard to find good one special from jakarta.
    from internet mostly of them is a liar and gold digger. but still some of them good. but hard to judge. im a girl. and i have many good friends. and i know all of them are good. ahaha but the problem is they are not really interest for bule . and they cant talk much english.
    i read most oll of u guys looking for companion. but if u are looking for companion. sometimes honest is good. but if u are looking for real relationship. dont too honest. like say sex is important. but if u say that is first date lol. sorry goodbye for u then. bcus in time u will get it. an onething. if u are nice to the girl they will be nice to. respect them and they will respect u. but if the dont. just walk away

  98. Sometimes the only reason I went to coffee shop is trying to at least see a foreigner. Because I always believe that foreigner is love drink a coffee. But actually my chance is 1:100. It never really happened but I still love going to coffee shop for that reason. Please don't stop me for keeping my hope. Lol.

  99. hi there, i know this is out of topic but if you're on tight schedule, no time to go out and explore jakarta, or too tired to take a risky adventure BUT in need of a good traditional deep pressure massage... you could email me at

    Female experienced masseuse, speak fluent english, clean, professional, educated, and able to hold the conversation if needed (if you don't need the conversation, you could just keep silent, enjoy the massage on your back and relax).

    Outcall only, but at this moment only available for some Jakarta area and hotels. Email me for further details.

  100. How/Where to meet girls in Jakarta?
    I went to X2 last Friday, I didn't plan to go out as I was still in the office until like 11pm. So I went there with just a low cut long sleeve t-shirt and jeans. As I arrived there, there were two bules already made eye contact with me, I ignored simply I wasn't interested (yet). As I approached the bar to make some orders, that bule who laid eyes on me at the entrance was next to me about to order too! He introduced himself as a Swedish guy and he chatted me up. I wasn't interested at the beginning as I am pretty much "done" with bule in Jakarta especially the ones in the club. I haven't been out (read: clubbing) since I celebrated New Year in Bali, and that didn't leave me with a nice impression with the scene I saw at Mint, Woo Bar, Cocoon, Potato Head, and also Kudeta! My God, that was hell of an experience when I saw a hungry bule met a gold-digger, who should be blamed? They made perfect match from heaven! Ok back again to my last weekend story. So I was in the right mood to actually give it a go should I meet a polite bule who chatted me up as I had this premonition that things in Jakarta may be a bit different as the bule here mostly executives not holiday maker, and the girls are more educated with sophisticated background. Damn I was completely wrong! Here is worse to my opinion!! The Swedish guy I met I followed me as I came back to where my friends were, and he was constantly trying to build a nice conversation with me as he asked about my job, my age, who my friends are, bla bla bla. There I was, engaged to him in a long and detailed conversation. I told him that I am an architect, and so are my friends. He was a bit intimidated when I told him our job, and especially when he was trying to guess how old we are. He thought we are all below 25! Because he is 25! Hahaha the truth is, we are in our late 20s - well thanks for that at least. After that question, he started to feel like an idiot perhaps so he made excuses to the toilet and never returned! What a surprise! As I didn't move from my spot, that's why when he passed me by, I saw him and he made a quick stop to give a peck on my cheek as he was actually holding a girl's hand who dressed up to kill with a plungin low cut strap dress and towering studded heels with red hot chill lipstick! Somebody, it's burning!! I was sttunned, and left in an awe! Few secs after, the girl went back to me and asked why I kissed him. Come on, was she blind? He kissed me, on the cheek even! I just stared at her and told her to leave as she is so way out of my league! But then what makes me sad is that, bule always complain of they met the wrong girls. Seriously, my experience is a total humiliation as I was pushed over to be replaced by this so-called wrong girl. I didn't wear any provoking dress, I have a good job, I pay my own drinks, but still I was losing the game. Honestly I wasn't really competing, but the feeling I had after that scene, I was sad.. Sad for me and also for them.. Why I was sad and why I was sad for them as well? Well.. For those who have experienced what I just had, would know why.. That is just an example of don't always blame the girls, sometimes the bule deliberately throw themselves to the wrong ones..

  101. Right, 'May 19' - let me see if I have the sequence here :

    - a guy you werent interested in tried to put the moves on you

    - you intimidated him, with the aid of your architect friends, and he moved on to another girl who was clearly looking to 'party' (whatever her motives or dress sense)

    Despite the fact that you reportedly had *no interest* in this guy, you feel he has 'deliberately thrown himself to the wrong one' ? I don't think you need a Master's Degree to see that he was looking for a good time, and I doubt that he particularly cared what color her lipstick was. We males are ruled by our hormones - simple equation, really. I respect the fact that you weren't there to jump the first guy who said 'Hi', but I think you are being overly harsh on both our male friend and his one-night love interest. If she *was* Ayam, so what ? Your mistake, IMO, was to keep talking to the guy when he came back to your table - all you needed to say was that you were there for a 'girls night out' and nothing more - 99% of guys will take that hint and move on.

    I guess he made the mistake of thinking he was in a *club* and not a meeting place for pretentious professionals in their late 20s. I hope I never make the same mistake ;)

  102. let me reply to June 16 comment....I couldn't agree with you more....Too many pretentious females in this world.

  103. I am the one who posted a comment on May 19. Who is the pretentious one? Are you kidding me??? I am no saint or angelic girl, but I also aint a fake professional Architect who wouldn't enjoy a good kiss for one night! Clearly it was the Swedish guy who got intimidated as he probably didn't expect to meet a professional architect in such a place (thats just how shallow he is). The two of you who posted on June 16 were probably exactly the typical bule I described there - who deliberately throw themselves to the wrong ones! I can't believe with your statement "If she *was* Ayam, so what?" That totally answers my one-million dollar question all this long! Thank you, but to me you guys are nothing but a cringe bule! Do not whine when what you get is what you see - oh wait till the girl is off make up and fake eyelashes and start to rip you off with some sick drama about her family! Mamam!!

  104. So you are an architect....So what! I think u overestimate yourself and your ego.

  105. Yep - definitely a Prima Donna with an over-inflated sense of self worth. 'May 19', please give us all a break and stay home with your friends - the Swedish guy didnt go to that club expecting to meet anyone other than women who were there for a *good time*, and all you had to do was tell him you weren't interested. Not too tough, surely, for a professional woman like yourself, even if you dont appear to completely grasp the meaning of 'pretentious'. Have a nice life.

  106. June 18, both of you.. Just admit that what I was saying is true! I didn't say I wasn't interested to the Swedish guy, it was the contrary, I was indeed! I wanted to have more than fun that night as I didnt go out since I celebrated NYE in Bali. Didnt you read my story and really comprehend it?? However that Swedish guy made himself uncomfortable no matter I tried to carry on with the conversation. My assumption he got bored because we are real girls and he was looking some "unreal" girls. My point here is, we - Indonesian professional girls who have real job - also wanna have fun but with a limited time to go home and change, we sometimes have to be pushed away and loosing the game in such place. It is such an irony that bule complain about being ripped off by so-called wrong girls yet when they meet girls with good job, they barely stay a minute! That is my point! You two have a nice life! I am so done with bule.. Very extremely arrogant!

  107. im a good girl, love money and work hard for it! many expact in jakarta has no good chance in their country to have a good job, and that why they are trying hard here to survive and sometimes they treat indonesien women without respect! i would kick them, if they do it to me!

  108. most of bules in jakarta found their wife in the club..i know many of them! but if you want to meet a nice girl, just go to mosque hehe..

  109. Selamat sore,

    apa kabar? Nama saya Tobias. Saya jerman dan saya tinngal di Stuttgart. Saya berumur dua puluh empat.
    (how are you? My name is Tobias. I'm from Germany and I'm living in Stuttgart. I am 24years old.)

    I'm coming to Jakarta on August the 9th and will stay only till 11th. On 11th, I will go to Yogyakarta to visit Alam Bahasa to improve bahasa indonesia. I study Economic Language Asia and learn bahasa indonesia in my studies but I just started ;).

    Does anyone wants to go out with me on 9th or 10th? It doesn't matter where you from, whether female or male.

    Maybe two female study colleagues from my course, also from Germany, are going out with me too but I don't know yet but the more the better :).

    I want to go out doing party and just have fun but I'm not interested in ayam.

    Leave a comment here if you are interested.


    1. Halo toby,

      Im hendi, mani from Jakarta, i can be your travel guide for free, i just wanna improve my english skill, im a student of private uni in jakarta, if you interested just sent me an email :

  110. I found this posting is quite interesting!

    I am an Indonesian student who are interested with the foreigners because of cultural reason.I'm virgin,I don't smoke,I don't take drugs,and I don't like clubbing.Too bad the expats only looking for sex and have fun.

    I am also a member in a dating site and until now I haven't find a good one. My love life is just not lucky I guess..

    For bule who are looking for Indonesian decent women,just keep looking! There will be probably few Indonesian girls that suit with your criteria.

    Some of my friends also like bule guys. We (as the girls who are interested with bule) are really hard to get ones. It's because we are not bitchy girls and I think most of bule likes the bitchy ones(NOT ALL BUT MOSTLY).

    IMO,If you want to get a good girls to be your wife,you shud be their friend first as many smart and educated Indonesian girls looking for bule friends to practice their language skill.

    Cheers xxx

  111. Why almost everyone here only eye for Bule?I am not a Bule but is sincerely looking for a wife to take care of me and to produce children.
    Hanging and loitering in the shopping centres aimlessly whether I am in Medan,BDG or JKT and is too shy to approach ladies.
    Is there any hand signal for me to show to tell that I am looking for a girlfriend?

  112. agongkia, I dont know about Medan, but most women in a city like Jakarta probably arent too keen to hear that their role will be to look after you and 'produce children'. I would suggest that you arent looking for a girlfriend so much as a nanny/housekeeper - in the long run, it may be cheaper to simply *hire* the latter while you work on your strategy for meeting the former : failure to do so could result in a completely different set of 'hand signals' to those you may have envisioned. Of course, I may be totally underestimating the modern Jakartan female - perhaps she *does* actually want to be barefoot and pregnant for the next 20 years - good luck with that.

  113. Indonesian girls will say all sorts of things to make case in their defense but the truth is they know they are 'making a case'. Most of them are actually looking for an expat for his ability to spend on her. Local guys do not draw a salary thats anywhere near that of the expats. There is no dearth of decent Indo girls but when it comes to dating or "loving" an expat its primarily in search of material comforts. Nothing wrong in seeking material comfort. But why depend on others for that? Why not achieve it yourself? Look at women in other countries and know how dignified women in general there are. Not that every woman is scaling the highs but majority of them are not looking at material comfort by manipulating men. Howsoever denials may come from some of the esteemed contributors here but its a truth we all know so prevalent in this country. My only suggestion to my respected Indonesian fellow women is stand on your own, buy your LV bags or Gucci shoes from your own money. If salaries are low, then shed the temptation of running after luxury. Indonesia's record in education is one of the worst in the world. Think of that. Educate yourself and you will find yourself on the top. With love to one and all .... best wishes

  114. I read a lot of comments from Indonesian girls that it is so hard to meet a faithfull Western guy and that all the Western guys like to play around.

    This is however the girls own fault, those players are the attractive guys for them because all of us know girls like bad guys or bad boys. That is why you always get the wrong guy.

    I am 40 and have lived in Jakarta for 7 years. When i just arrived i found a few girls in the club but i soon discovered this was not my thing, So nowadays i only go to bars and cafe's (mostly in Kemang and Epicentrum or Mega Kuningan) for a drink, but still hope to find a nice girl. It never happens.

    The fact is i have always been alone in Jakarta since 6 years now and have not found ONE GIRL who wants to talk to me or meet me or who is interested in me.

    I think this is because i am not a player and girls feel that, in the malls they always see me walking alone, same in the places like Loewy, Liq Exch, E.P. etc. Girls are simply not interested in me, the local chicks are too busy chatting up and getting the players, the popular guys.

    I go to gym, like to stay in shape, but it seems not to be enough, i think i am nice, can buy anything i like (good job) and am not stingy with anybody, it all is not enough.

    So girls stop complaining that you cannot find a faithfull or nice bule guy, you yourself are to blame because you only have eyes for the bad guys the players

    1. Hi,what your name?
      I'm a good girl n I like to be a friend of u,plis contac me

    2. Hello...may i be your friend

    3. How can i write to you...would you please share your email ?

  115. Dude, the 40 y.o bule before me, you are a loser, walking alone like a chump in a mall looking for good girls. You prolly come off as creepy, like the thousands of bules in Pattaya. Gross!

  116. Not sure why anyone would trawl shopping malls when there are so many Indonesian women looking for love online. That's a minefield, but it beats approaching someone who may have absolutely no interest in meeting a foreigner - awkward .....

  117. good girl doesnt like bule, but bad girl does haha..i know it!

  118. I know Thai working girls who have been with, conservatively, over a thousand men and would drink many on this blog under the table, but I have *never* been asked to buy them drugs - not once, over many trips to Thailand. They know what amphetamines do to people, and act accordingly. How is it that 'nice' Indo girls in Jakarta clubs will ask me for something that the 'worst of the worst' in Bangkok won't ? I'm happy to respect Indonesian women, but ask me for drugs and that goes straight out the window - if you want to be taken seriously, dont ask Bule for drugs. Have a nice day.

  119. Wow! I was planning to go live in Indonesia for a while, but after reading this, maybe I will go somewhere else. I will certainly not go to Jakarta. Do men and women think so badly about each other and have such complicated relationships in all of Indonesia? Or only Jakarta?

  120. Agongkia, u are very sexist! So u want to find a woman just to take care of you and produce babies?? Selfish bastard. No wonder ur still looking! Thats why i dont like indo men, i have met nice bule guys. I smoke and i drink and like to have fun, but i know my boundaries. Dont expect too much. And i didnt ask money from them cause i have good job.

  121. @Anon 5.32 and anon 1050 pm
    Thanks for the advice.
    Wow,I just want a good Indonesian wife and anon 1050 consider me selfish bastard huh?
    Haha..Whats wrong with finding good husband that wish to take care of them and help me to produce cute babies?Luckily I still have faith in Indonesian woman and do not consider everyone's view is like you.
    Do you mean JKT woman are not interested to have a good husband, produce children and start a family but prefer to smoke ,drink and have fun and prefer to meet nice Bule,not for the purpose of marriage?You want to remain single even if you have a chance to find good man like me?You must be that 0.0000000000001%
    Your view does not represent the rest of those hardworking ,gentle,honest,simple ,loyal ,responsible ,proper temperament and pretty sweet Indonesian ladies that I met.Good one will usually be shy to tell you that they want to start a family and produce children with hope of finding good man .Majority of good woman need to be recommended because they usually stay at home.They do not go pub to look for target .
    I now intend to eye for those hidden treasure in those supermarket or wet markets because I guess these are usually good girls buying groceries and love to do cooking .Just pray that they are not married housewives.Wish me good luck.In the meantime,if you want to do your good friend a favour by getting her a good husband,can email me
    Terima Kasih manyak..
    Will be in JKT tomorrow for 2 days.

  122. any of you who needs my assistance as a tour guide or bahasa teacher, contact me at

  123. Im indonesian woman. Well educated and have a great job. Not a party type. I dont look for other's money coz i can earn my very own. The thing that attract me about bule is if we married with one, we will produce a super cute babies which is mix indo-caucasian.

  124. To the professional architecture girl who posted on may 19th and again in june, please contact me, you sound awesome.

  125. 'indonesian woman', there is an alternative to 'super cute indo-caucasian mix', and the cost of raising a child. Simply get on a plane to Korea and tell them you want to look like a K-Pop star - how many of them do you think were actually *born* with Eurasian features ?

  126. Miss May 19, that swedish guy was obviously looking for something fast and basic, somehow the kiss on chick was a way to show his respect... kind of rude at the end but take it that way. Though I am a bule, I easily understand your frustration and you spotted male's weakness :) Don't bother with pretentious lads who answered afterwards. They probably think they are sexier than average, looking for fast and basic as well. Take care

  127. Hello January 29 and January 5. This is Miss May 19 here. Thank you for considering me awesome (January 5) and understanding my frustration during that kind of circumstance (January 29). I am now engaged with my old flame and we're going to hold the wedding reception this summer. I wish you two the very best and (only) nicest experience in Jakarta and may you two will always be guraded by the angels to avoid the "nice" girls from ripping you two off :)

  128. Hehe, no chance, I'll be safe.
    Congratulations for your wedding, wish you a memorable day and happiness forever. Take care.

  129. Uh... What's wrong being sexually active and not a virgin...
    Smoking and drinking, it's personal choices...
    There are some women who do all those but never cheated on their partners. And I personally know those who think smoking's disgusting, drinking's is bad and were virgins when they got married end up the ines who initiated affairs first or divorces...
    Cut short, there are lots of hypocrites here!

  130. I love european/caucasian too, i guess it's in my genes. Need proof? My cousins are from various continents, european aus america. Some of them married to a Brit. So does that make me shallow too? Ha.
    So now can someone tell me where to find nice good looking bule? I'm a good girl, educated, not looking for money, i have a decent job that i love ;)

  131. I'm a young British expat, arriving in Jakarta soon.

    I have no interest in bar girls, party girls or a princess living on Daddy's credit card...

    What's a good way to find a really quality girl in Jakarta? I'm talking about a beautiful, sophisticated and intelligent girl who is a joy to be around. A girl who does work she likes, is emotionally mature and intelligent, and has a creative hobby like art or travel, etc.

    There are many girls like this in Paris and London. How about Jakarta? :)

    1. Hi, read my comment on july 1st. You should try it! Good luck!

  132. @Jack I'm Indo girl but I'm not a bar girl, party girl or a princess living on Daddy's credit card ;-)
    And I do have a job that I love, really grateful for that.

  133. Hi, its a very nice article.
    I'm an Indo girl and I wanna tell you my opinion about finding good girls in Jkt.
    1. Most of good and educated Indo girls are busy with their own activities and join many communities. So they don't have time to get drunk. They rarely, even never go to a club, unless there's a friend's birthday party. So, join a community! In your church perhaps. Or you can try to join these communities: Jakarta Movement of Inspiration, Young on Top, Indonesian Youth, Indonesia Mengajar, Relawan Belajar, Action with Mangrove, etc. But, I'm not sure if an expats could join it hahahaha. Well, at least try to know one of those girls whose joining those kinda activities. :-)
    2. Many of good and well-educated girls hang out at mall or cafe. My tips, find mall that are near to a well-known college. Example: Lippo Mal Karawaci, Summarecon Mal Serpong, Flavour Bliss, Living World, and Teras Kota. Those malls are near with many well-known college such as UPH, UMN, Binus Alsut, SGU, and Prasmul. And mostly, they're from extremely very rich family, so they won't looking for your money.
    3. Once you're attracted, don't be too aggressive! Try some of these questions: what museum's do I have to see while I'm in Jkt? What events do I have to go? How do I get there? What kind of public transportation should I use? What is gado-gado and ketoprak? Etc. After that, you can ask if they have a line id or whatsapp or twitter or email, but mostly they won't have kik hahaha. Don't ask their phone number straightly! They will give it to you once they trust you.

    Well, good luck!

    1. Anyway, if there's anything about jkt you would like to ask, contact me via email

    2. I really love ur tips ...
      heaps thanks...

  134. My lecturer is talking about you as I type this comment.

  135. Absolutely TRUE. 99.9% females of Jakarta are looking for big money, luxury and easy life sans sincere and honest commitment or freiendship/relationship. Sad. Is'nt it?

  136. I don't think so...still there ome of "normal" people who want to find true love but secure in financial doesn't mean have to living luxurious...

  137. Hi I working as a Lecturer in a university and I am planning to visit Indonesia to see some of the best places with natural beauty. I plan to spend around 10 days and book some of the good resorts serving organic food, spa and meditation facilities. I would be glad if I can find a travel companion in Indonesia with whom I can engage intellectual conversation about this world. Please let me know if anybody is interested, I am well educated in UK and currently working in Middle East. I expect you to be an educated and cheerful person in life. We can communicate further by e mail: and finalize. Good wishes to all my friends in Indonesia.

  138. You fucking bitches are ridiculous.

    Look. What defines a "good girl" eh? It's all just cultural semantics. For example, a dude who likes sex sometsimes is normal right? Why then is a girl who likes sex suddenly put under the criteria of "bad girl"

    I'm not going to post my email or contact here so let me be honest.

    I'm an Indonesian girl. I like sex. I like weird sex. I drink sometimes, mostly socially and sometimes I smoke. Tried weed one time didn't like it. Never had any other drugs. I'm not looking for a relationship right now because my life situation is a bit ambiguous and I don't know where I'll be in a few year's time. So sometimes I like just playing around.

    Do I ever cheat on a partner if I am in a relationship? Never. Do I expect a guy to pay for everything? No. (Though if dude makes a lot more than me it's only fair if he pays for stuff a larger percentage of the time, or at least agrees to go to places that wouldn't make me starve to death when I'm not with him.) Do I ever ask for expensive gifts? I think the most expensive gift a bf ever got me was... rum, and I didn't ask for it. He works for an alcohol distribution company.

    I am educated, I am open-minded, and I am sex-positive. What about that makes me a "bad" girl eh?

    Fucking bitches ya'll. Double standards. And they say sexism is dead.

  139. CC ➡ Sushi Tei type.

  140. August 19th, 2017 was probably some salty male trying to play reverse psychology.