If you think that as an expat in Indonesia you can be with any girls you want, you're wrong. Many of them would never date a foreigner for a whole variety of reasons.
As I love to do some generalizing and stereotyping, I've listed below 10 types of Indonesian girls who never date foreigners and what you can do to date them nonetheless.
![]() |
Why would some girls refuse to date foreigners? |
The Ones Who Don't Want To Have Sex Before Marriage
A 2014 study from the Pew Research Center found that 97% of Indonesians considered pre-marital sex to be morally unacceptable. On the other end of the spectrum, only 6% of French agreed with that statement.
The 2010 Greater Jakarta Transition to Adulthood Survey asked 3,006 Indonesians between 20 and 34 years old about their sexual activity. 5% of women had had pre-marital sex and 16% of men.
Let me rephrase: Only 5% of unmarried Indonesian women between 20 and 34 living in Greater Jakarta were sexually active in 2010.
Since the population in the area is so large, it still represents over 300,000 girls. The 6,700,000 remaining girls will most likely not date foreigners as few of them can accept a sexless relationship.
How to date them:
Abstinence.
The 2010 Greater Jakarta Transition to Adulthood Survey asked 3,006 Indonesians between 20 and 34 years old about their sexual activity. 5% of women had had pre-marital sex and 16% of men.
Let me rephrase: Only 5% of unmarried Indonesian women between 20 and 34 living in Greater Jakarta were sexually active in 2010.
Since the population in the area is so large, it still represents over 300,000 girls. The 6,700,000 remaining girls will most likely not date foreigners as few of them can accept a sexless relationship.
How to date them:
Abstinence.
The Ones Who Are More Attracted to Indonesian Men and Culture
Many Indonesian girls just prefer the Indonesian type of men. Not everyone is a fan of our hairy legs and big nose. They also feel more connected with someone with the same background, the same culture, the same values and the same objectives. They will like typical Indonesian traits better.
I also think that if you grow up watching local actors, singers or models, you will probably want a boyfriend who look like them and behave like them.
How to date them:
Shave, groom well and immerse yourself in Indonesian culture (i.e. watch sinetrons).
I also think that if you grow up watching local actors, singers or models, you will probably want a boyfriend who look like them and behave like them.
How to date them:
Shave, groom well and immerse yourself in Indonesian culture (i.e. watch sinetrons).
The Ones Who Think the Choice of Foreigners is Too Poor
I met a few girls who don't date Jakarta expats and I don't blame them. They find the choice of good guys available to be poor. As a friend explained me, most serious expats are married or in a relationship. Among the ones available for dating, very few actually want any kind of commitment.
She also feels the pool of expats is so small that it seems everyone knows each other.
How to date them:
Tell them you "just arrived" in Jakarta and criticize the behaviour of other expats.
She also feels the pool of expats is so small that it seems everyone knows each other.
How to date them:
Tell them you "just arrived" in Jakarta and criticize the behaviour of other expats.
The Ones Who Are Afraid of What Society Might Think
When an Indonesian girl is dating a foreigner, it's just as if she was wearing a big sign saying "I'm not a virgin anymore".
Indonesians are obsessed with virginity. To work in the Police or the Military, women must pass a virginity test. Inspector General Moechgiyarto justified it saying that girls who are not virgins might be "prostitutes". The equation non-virgin equates prostitutes is deeply entrenched in the Indonesian psyche unfortunately.
Many Indonesian girls who date foreigners complain that they are called names when walking the street with their foreign boyfriends, or that they must face derogatory comments. Considering this, I can really understand why some girls would avoid dating expats.
How to date them:
Don't flirt with them in public. Take their numbers and chat with them through Line or WhatsApp.
Indonesians are obsessed with virginity. To work in the Police or the Military, women must pass a virginity test. Inspector General Moechgiyarto justified it saying that girls who are not virgins might be "prostitutes". The equation non-virgin equates prostitutes is deeply entrenched in the Indonesian psyche unfortunately.
Many Indonesian girls who date foreigners complain that they are called names when walking the street with their foreign boyfriends, or that they must face derogatory comments. Considering this, I can really understand why some girls would avoid dating expats.
How to date them:
Don't flirt with them in public. Take their numbers and chat with them through Line or WhatsApp.
The Ones Who Are Conventional
The Indonesian society is conservative. Most people are told from an early age about what should happen to them in the future and they stick to the plan. For instance, their is a huge consensus among Indonesians that husbands are the head of the household and that the wives should serve them (over 95% - see page 30 here).
Dating or marrying a foreigner is rarely part of this narrative. It is an abnormality on many levels that require some thinking outside the box. For this reason, some Indonesian girls may feel that they should date an Indonesian guy because it is natural and less complicated.
How to date them:
Wait until they get a reality check. Among Indonesian girls who date foreigners, many used to be conventional. They "switched" to bules because they became disappointed with the narrative they were served when they were younger.
Dating or marrying a foreigner is rarely part of this narrative. It is an abnormality on many levels that require some thinking outside the box. For this reason, some Indonesian girls may feel that they should date an Indonesian guy because it is natural and less complicated.
How to date them:
Wait until they get a reality check. Among Indonesian girls who date foreigners, many used to be conventional. They "switched" to bules because they became disappointed with the narrative they were served when they were younger.
The Ones Who Are High Maintenance
Many Indonesian girls expect that their boyfriend will provide for them. I had a Sundanese girlfriend for several years and all her friends were getting some benefits from their respective boyfriends. Some would get a monthly allowance, pulsa on requests, or nice gifts like phones, clothes, perfumes and trips to Bali. A few were even getting cars and nice apartments in downtown Jakarta (those who were dating married men).
If you look closely, the most beautiful Indonesian girls are rarely dating foreigners because they know that most of them would never pay for those things.
How to date them:
Work harder and make more money.
If you look closely, the most beautiful Indonesian girls are rarely dating foreigners because they know that most of them would never pay for those things.
How to date them:
Work harder and make more money.
The Ones Who Only Date Muslims
The law regarding interfaith marriage in Indonesia is complicated. As of today, the Indonesian Office of Religious Affairs forbids Muslims to marry people from different faith but allows it for Catholics, Protestants, Buddhists and Hindus.
It is therefore quite natural for a girl who is a devout Muslim to look for a companion of the same faith so that she can actually marry him. She will feel that there is no point in dating someone who does not share the same religious beliefs.
How to date them:
Convert to Islam.
It is therefore quite natural for a girl who is a devout Muslim to look for a companion of the same faith so that she can actually marry him. She will feel that there is no point in dating someone who does not share the same religious beliefs.
How to date them:
Convert to Islam.
The Ones Who Only Date Indo-Chinese
Rich Indonesian-Chinese girls are probably the hardest to date in Jakarta. They are very careful about their image in their community and they wouldn't ruin their reputation for a random guy. They will choose a boyfriend who will give them a better status.
They also tend to summarize some of the points mentioned above: Many will stay virgin until marriage and they are high-maintenance.
This is also true about the top 5% Indonesian political elite. Its members will often marry within that small community with motivations that are related to status more than love.
How to date them:
Mingle with the Indo-Chinese community and become accepted. Once you belong, you will date any girl easily. Avoid being poor though.
They also tend to summarize some of the points mentioned above: Many will stay virgin until marriage and they are high-maintenance.
This is also true about the top 5% Indonesian political elite. Its members will often marry within that small community with motivations that are related to status more than love.
How to date them:
Mingle with the Indo-Chinese community and become accepted. Once you belong, you will date any girl easily. Avoid being poor though.
The Ones Who Don't Dare
Some Indonesian girls, particularly the younger ones in their late teens will only date guys from within their group of friends. They stick to the same closed group when they party, they do not use dating sites and they politely turn down any outsider trying to flirt with them. They will see a relationship with a foreigner as a threat to their belonging to the group.
Many Indonesian girls do not dare dating foreigners because they are shy. Most often, they cannot speak English and feel embarrassed. They don't know the codes of dating someone from another culture: What to say, what to do, how to behave, etc. The fear of being judged is often greater than the fear of death in Indonesia.
Some may also feel they are not "worthy". Surprisingly, some girls who have a whiter skin think they won't be attractive to an expat who, they heard, prefer tanned skins (or this might be another case of humble bragging).
How to date them:
Learn Indonesian. It's the easiest language in the world you have no excuses. Smile all the time and repeat "tidak apa apa".
The Ones Who Only Date FriendsSome may also feel they are not "worthy". Surprisingly, some girls who have a whiter skin think they won't be attractive to an expat who, they heard, prefer tanned skins (or this might be another case of humble bragging).
How to date them:
Learn Indonesian. It's the easiest language in the world you have no excuses. Smile all the time and repeat "tidak apa apa".
How to date them:
You need approval from the whole group of friends. Or you wait until they grow up and start to think for themselves (it usually happens after they graduate and start working).
LOL.. this is quite amusing.
ReplyDeleteSome of it are right and some just made me laugh :D
ReplyDeleter u merried beib?
Deleteaddition : some of Indonesian girls do not trust that Foreigner will have Commitment to a serious level of relationship
ReplyDeleteVery true
DeleteAre you aware how unfaithful indonesian men are as a whole? Sangat banyak suka main2 di belankang pasangan
DeleteAre you not aware of how unfaithful so many indonesian men are? Sangat banyak main2 di belakang pasangan
DeleteThat's its true.. Most of Indonesian woman are doesn't have faith in relation with foreigners....
DeleteI dated a british citizen 5 years ago. This article is quite right, i dont do sex before married, so i rejected him few times, last time he asked i told him terms to date me : no sex before married. He surprisingly agreed! We have been together for 5 years, 1 year marriage still happy 😊😊
ReplyDeleteI was 25 he was 31 when we first met ☺
this part too funny forreal but this is the truth lmao "If you look closely, the most beautiful Indonesian girls are rarely dating foreigners because they know that most of them would never pay for those things"
ReplyDeleteI do have a lot of friends from abroad, hard to say that many of them just looking for underage girl which is known as chiki-chiki in the club, because chiki-chiki are easy to be fooled. So girls, you have to be smart ;)
ReplyDeleteMy best friend and I are in love. I keep him in friendzone because I've never dated a foreigners before nor have I ever interested in one. He and I text each other 24 hours a day for years but the idea of us dating or going out just the two of us in public is scary. I'm afraid of what the public will call me
ReplyDeleteWho cares what other people think? If you are in love go for it! It doesn't come around often.
DeleteJust forget it, there are more important things in life than a trife relationship. There are so many men. Move on. Be proud of who you are and your culture :)
DeleteI think most girls won't date a foreigner because when people see them walking on the street they think it looks cheap.
DeleteMost Muslim girls do not want to date a non-Muslim when they are still young... It's only once the girls discover that their boyfriends are cheating on them on a regular basis/treating them like shit that they will start looking elsewhere... Once they date bule they never go back to Indonesian guys... It's like going back to A&W after trying Burger King.
ReplyDeleteThe only reason why Indonesian Chinese girls are the hardest to get are actually very simple.
ReplyDelete1. The majority of Caucasians that we see in here date the natives/locals that looks like our maids at home. This gross us out, makes us wonder whether the term exotic means the uglier the better.
2. This also makes us wonder about your standard and class. We really don't consider the natives/locals to be the same standard as we are thanks to the 1965 and 1998 massacre plus the long rooted racism that they have inflicted upon us for a long time.
3. Like I said, it just gross us out we therefore don't normally give you a second look.
4. We're high maintenance? Sure, but we don't need your money to maintain or support us either - unlike the majority of natives/locals.
5. We don't worship the ground you walked. Wanting to date us means you need to put extra efforts. Be funny, be respectable, good personal hygiene, stable, responsible, vision for the future, interesting, captivating etc etc etc.
All in all, most of the comments here about Indonesian Chinese are ignorant and stereotypical at best. There's a reason why Indonesian Chinese aren't known as "bule hunter" and there's a reason why the local/native girls are known for that. You must see the difference when Indonesian Chinese goes to western country, we really have no qualms into dating Caucasians.
You are correct with your observations.
DeleteCaucasians don't have high standards when it comes to dating and they have sex during the dating stage easily. One night stands are not uncommon in their culture and seen as macho. Caucasian men will also date anyone and anything Asian. Their standards in selecting women are not that strict. I will give you an example, you can go to Hong Kong or Singapore and it's not hard to see many Caucasian men holding hands with Filipinas who are also working there as domestic workers. Then come to the U.S, Canada, Australia, etc. You will see many Caucasian men dating Asian women of all kinds and they take everything .... ugly, fat, skinny, pretty, divorced, widowed .... EVERYTHING AND ANYTHING! The one thing that I do want to point out is that if you have lived in those countries, you will understand that these same Caucasian men wouldn't have a chance with Caucasian women because they are not "man" enough. But to some Asian women they suddenly become valuable because these Asian women don't know any better. Observe, watch and learn.
Funny how you talked about racism when you're one of those assholes :)
DeleteI'm an Indo-Chinese myself and totally agreed with you about about it, finally someone speaks for us😂
DeleteI'm an Indo-Chinese too, and I have to say that I agree with the article. Even all is back to something called -love-. I have an American boyfriend, and when people usually see the foreigners who support their local partner here (sometimes their family too), because the stereotype here is "white people has more money" well..it doesn't happen in my love story. I'm more independent in financial than my boyfriend. My parents always told me to be independent to support ourselves and have our own business to pay other people (shop...shop...shop!LOL), and yes, I do. I have my main job as a teacher but also own a shop. I'm not saying it's easy for me to 'sell' my man in front of my family. They tried to match me with my relatives in order to keep the 'Chinese line' LOL. I refused them, I chose my boyfriend. So let's see if this is my best decision or I'll be back taking one of my matching relatives. Only if they're not taken yet hahahaha
DeleteI really liked all of your opinion, and it's true
DeleteWhat a racist remark!
DeletePerhaps the arrogance of Chinese-Indonesians is why they are being discriminated against?
I've seen the bad way Chinese people have treated pribumi and it is unacceprable.
Most Chinese women = money-grabbing Golddigger (ugly) bitches!
So you complain about a racist remark by making a racist insult... That's interesting...
DeleteBeing racist while complaining racism is edgy, ammirite?! Speaking as a native Indo, we both (native and Chinese Indo) DO ACT RACISM TOWARDS EACH OTHER, IN EQUAL MANNER. We ARE still horrible nation in this regard, proven by existence of a Chinese-Indo like you, and considerable number of my native Indo fellows. I have nothing to say on this issue, nor get any idea to solve it. Better start from ourselves, personally. Eventually, this motherland will get what it deserves: a better Indonesia. So uhh, be not racist, will ya?
DeleteJust go to your homeland china if you cant elaborate with other indonesian, make a choice if you were indonesian: you have to blend with other indonesian or if choose chinese: go to your miserable origin country and never go back to indonesia, and stop playing victim with your shitty racism comment you stupid pig eater
DeleteThe fuck with these muslims complaining about chinese who doesnt want to be friend with them? You pig hater muslims call us najis, kafeer, pig eater, not allowing us to work in goverment though we already elaborated and become a truely indonesian, got our shop robbed and girls were raped, must convert to islam just so we can be accepted as a worker, and when we finally are being exclusive just so we dont have to being hurt for your doing and you called us racist?got triggered with it? IDIOT.
DeleteNot about you are bule hunter. But because u are keputihan or becek, jadi bukan kamu yg gak mau, tapi mereka juga gak mau kawin sama memek becek, udh gtu kamu sebenernya juga mau kawin sama bule secara kontol mereka gede, sedangkan pria dari rasmu kontolnya kecil dan hampir semuanya ejakulasi dini.. think twice. Kebanyakan cici2 kawin sama cowok chinese yg mukanya buruk rupa, sedangkan yg cakep2 kawin sama yg pribumi, simply saying : Memek becek Gold and money hunter. Thanks
DeleteFINALLY, someone who speaks the truth. These comments are spot on and very true. After having been involved and even having lived with Indo Chinese women, these comments are true. Most of the Indonesian girls that latch onto bules are from the lower/poorer classes. The main difference between marrying and Indo Chinese girls and a native Pribumi (muka pembantu/bule) girl is that the CHinese father in law will be giving you money for a house and with the Pribumi girl you will have to buy a house for the Father. Don't forget that almost every Pribumi girl you meet in the bar has traded her pussy for money in one way or another several times before meeting you. This website is the best!
DeleteAs an Indonesian girl, I encourage all the expat guy in Indonesia to do what the writer said on how to date Indonesian. Come back and tell me if it works out well. Lmao
DeleteHow do Indo-Chinese women feel about African Americans or foreigners who aren't white?
DeleteIt is true, foreigners that live in Asia are quite shameless, going home for six months at a time for ‘business’ or visa reasons a.k.a. Visiting their wife. It is true, they are generally older men that have been unsuccessful at dating in their home countries and they just love bragging to me about how their wife ‘let’s them cheat’ or going into details about the whore they just rented.. Do you mind if I vomit in the middle of your story? Sure the Geo Arbitrage buys you a better life than your government social security Cheque otherwise would, and I am glad for the decent folk that make the most of that, how come you feel it suddenly becomes Okay to act as you do? Why do you think foreigners have made themself such an easy target? I think I lost count of how many parents tried to sell me their daughter into marriage.. There is a reason local men don’t trade down, and the local women with foreigners…. Can’t speak for Indonesia as I haven’t arrived yet, but S.E.A. Is full of the same story. Standards are sexy, raise your own. As this comment is anonymous I retired at 21 and have been seeing the world for a decade and I be in Jakarta business. Looking forward to meeting people, trying all sorts of food and maybe making a few friends for life and even learning the language….
DeleteAlso, you live there now, Act accordingly
- for those that need it
** before Karen and Chad complains, be smart enough to know if any of what I said applies to you, you know I speak facts…and if it does not it does not. Can you really blame Indonesian upper class for not noticing your existence, regardless of your decency or lack thereof
Hello girls,
ReplyDeleteMy name is Sonja McDonell, lesbian, 23, Swiss Airlines stewardess, very tender with much fantasies, also in my wonderful job with 13 oversea towns.
This isn't really true. I had 2 24yo twin sisters in the Travelhotel in Jakarta 3 times overnight last march.
Regards
Sonja --> sonjamcdonell@yahoo.com
I dont date foreigners are cheater
ReplyDeleteu sound like a 40 year old pedophile trying to scam prepubescent children. GTFO
DeleteReally? I'm an Indonesian woman...and all I know is most of Indonesian people are not that conservative anymore. They won't admit it (unless they trust you enough), but most Indonesians especially the young ones are sexually active before marriage, but they will always act as if they are all so religious. You can't expect so much honesty here.
ReplyDeleteI agree with Widya. I tried the Tinder thing in Jakarta once and within 4 days, I think I met 5 girls. Out of those 5 girls, 4 would have slept with me right away(which I denied, believe it or not) and I'd consider myself to be normal-looking. They weren't your muka pembantu kind of girl either, more of a mix out of some normal local girls and some Chindo.
ReplyDeleteI also agree with Random.Goddess to some extent. Personally, I feel physically more drawn to Chinese-Indonesian, plus they're usually Christians. Most Chinese-Indonesians either really just seem to stay within their group(who can blame them). Some date foreigners too. I'd say they're pretty much like the Caucasian girls back home(although with better style, taste in fashion and they're probably more educated) in that they might date you if you can win them over.
And not all Chinese Indonesian are rich or high maintenance. I've dated some girls who were really rich and I've dated some who were just normal or even sort of poor. Rich or poor doesn't matter much, the poor ones can be jerks and the rich ones can be kind and sweet.
The one thing I also never get(but I'm happy about it, it means less competition) is that so many expats go for the muka pembantu type. Nothing against those girls, they're just human too, more power to them. I assume most expats are just extremely lazy and it's pretty easy to get with those girls.
Tinder is mostly a creepy dude looking for a hookup or asking a nudes (WTF man you can google a human body parts) and yeah 1% of Tinder population looking for a love (some said retardend men but there a hot guys to though)
Deleteand yeah if you lucky enough you will the MR Right In the ocean of asshole LOL
Yes I agree with you nike it is only for hookup's and I totally agree with your comments .
DeleteIm mandailing muslim woman and I dont date white men, I refuse american men purpose to marry me, I said from the beginning we are just friend, and then he suicide jump from 6th floor mall, his mother blame me, why his mother I have right to refuse, I never play man heart, cause I dont wanna man play my heart, Im very hardened woman and not feminine
ReplyDeleteI'm very sorry, something you want does not always have to be accepted. It is true. and we can not impose its
DeleteI am Indonesian woman who had West Sumatra Blood line, and yeah Muslim. people here so strict with the culture and religion.
ReplyDeleteand its true when I sick with local MEN I go Western. Surprising me that they are more polite and also straight to the point not PHP (PEMBERI HARAPAN PALSU) known as giving a fake hope or FALSE ALRM to be in relationship) so when you dating western MEN everything is crystal clear. you can tell the differences of the fuck boy and gentlemen right away. While Indonesian guy trying to act like a MEN when they are definitely asshole (well we are warm kind and hypocrite also)
for your information High Maintenance girl CAN Come in any color (some ignorant dumb never gonna get it ) and I am not like native Indonesian (skinny, brown skin, and muka pembantu) here my blog you can visit me https://stateofcrystalianike.wordpress.com/2017/03/06/l-o-v-e-yourself/
but I.m kinda offended when Indonesian hate their Native Indonesian just because they are born with dark skin or Java faces as known as muka pembantu. this is ignorant shit that you Bitches should open your fucking mind to it. or you probably Jealous seeing the muka pembantu type with hot freakin handsome MEN Holding hand or even have mixed babies...
NO ONE GOnna DATE A STUPID GIRLS who CANNOT HAVING A CONVERSATION WITH, SO even you a high maintenance Indo Chinese what ever fukin things if you stupid and ignorance bitch YOU DONT DESERVE ANY MEN
And yeah when you going Caucasian you will never go Indonesian.
CIAO
Agree, some of self proclaim High Maintenance girls can be really stupid, ignorant and full of themselves.what's wrong with brown skin? That sok cantik people tidak tau diri
DeleteLOL!!! but i am totally agree with you. damn, i like it!
DeleteI visited Jakarta recently just in April -2017. According to me the points mentioned here most of them a valid but about virginity sorry I cant believe it. About me I am an Indian origin Canadian. I met a girl who was desperate for money for her studies , so Had a conversation going with her and found out that all her friends (a group of 8 to 10 ) all were school girls(hardly 18) and none of them are virgins(They said they lost at 16 with their BF). And she says the girls who are virgins will only lose once they are married or they meet their correct BF. Anyway according to my discussion they were not that sexually active but in-case of any need they don't hesitate in having sex(This last point is according to me) . About meeting other people I found that Yes they never want to go out with you once work is done with you , they hardly care about you . And for the record all these girls had BF (Indonesian BF's) . Even if you spend thousands of dollars until you spend money they might spend time with you once you are done or she feels that it is time she will leave you ..
ReplyDeleteThe Girls I met were all Muslims conservative muslims they were so much into caste that I felt that they will never marry if you are non - muslim .(I wanted a muslim woman thats why I tried to reach only muslim girl not any other).
But the good side about them which amused me was, if one girl needs money and you contact her at that time and she is on her periods .. she will ask and convince her friend and get her for session and that money went to that girl really that generous for a friend will never happen any where .. as far as i have seen .. its rare here it was common as it happened twice .
These girls never wanted to date a foreign guys for sure all they need is fun time with them nothing more .. if you expect more than it is hard to get. Trust worthy girls .. ohh really sorry these girls when there is some pressure they will definetly cross the line for sure .. so thinking them to be wifes is hard (according to me)
Openness , the girls I met all bought their family member with them as they were young and afraid .. one I was shocked that she got her mother with her who was waiting in lobby :) .
All in all Indonesian Girls brown or white or what ever color they are cute and best as they are natural .. I really loved them when they didn't have any makeup .. they were dam attractive.
Why on earth are you having sex with school girls?
DeleteNOT ALL OF IT WERE TRUE THOU.. IAM AN INDONESIAN GIRL FROM WEST SUMATRA, and sorry i dont like statement about "muka pembantu" maid faces ? wtf ... people say lot of woman in java have "muka pembantu"? sorry sir i think they are just have a sweet smile and beautiful chocolate skin and of course its absolutely beautiful, who dont wanna eat chocolate? even thou its dark but its have a sweet taste... and you can go to Medan, (in Sumatera) they eat pork (not all of people) they have a dog in their home, and have a chinesse face even though they are not even have chinesse blood.
ReplyDeletei think that indo-chinesse in jakarta are so arrogant (not all of course) , i have a chinesse neighboard but they are all kind. but the tenagers are so arrogant and act like "this country belong to them, they are more educated and smart than the other" is just make me sick, you dont want pribumi to discriminated you but instead ..... aaaaahhh..... i cant say something like this people will call me racist. but just look at the mirror (not all of pribumi and chinesse girl are perfect and bad)
sorry for bad english, ijust wanna try to spell all of my opinion of that article and the comments here
im indonesian girl from west sumatra, and iam moslem, but not really religious.
ReplyDeleteyour article is good... but yeah still in 2017 they are "still" discriminted.
i think no ones is wrong. both of pribumi and chinesse are so stubborn and they think they are the perfect one (but not all of people of course, i have lot of friends are indo-chinesse) and you can go to Medan, you can see girls with chinesse faces but they dont even have a chinesse blood hahaaa.. indonesia have a lot of island and country, every country and every island have different kind of faces and of course they are all beautiful.
and indonesia have six or... i forgot, country which ever colonized indonesia.
like spanyol, portugis, England, Dutch, Japan. and maybe our blood is already mixed lol... (dutch colonize indonesia for more than 300 years). so theres no reason to say "iam pribumi so im indonesian" , you not even now what blood race in your body.
sorry for bad english im still learning :'/
Ive not been to jakarta. Planning for a travel. Any recommandation for places to visits during the day n nite for local food drinks and etc.
ReplyDeleteGo follow my instagram : ndnv25
ReplyDelete:D don't you think Solution you provide are more interesting than your article ? :D hahaha :) *just kidding :) Nice Article :)
ReplyDeleteHahaha sayangnya gue ga suka bule malah.. gada maksud buat sombong atau apa lahh..
ReplyDeleteNot all indonesian girl like foreign, i don't really like bule as my ideal type, for me Asian man more better. So don't be arrogant, cause the end is just about preference
I'm not into foreign men, especially those from Western Europe and Northern America. I prefer men who are from Asia. Indonesian, Filipino, China, Thailand, South Korea, Japan, Vietnam, Taiwan are probably my main choice to looking for a life partner.
ReplyDeleteI dont have muka pembantu as you described..I have dated several educated wealthy Indo guys..Ended up with a finnish guy..and what is wrong with having darker skin color?? Bule want sexy golden brown skin..It's beautiful on their eyes..Bules also dont like girls who are not comfortable in their own skin or too insecure about theirselves..I see people as a people, person as a person..Dont judge people by its skin color..It's so lame..
ReplyDeleteLol...tottaly true : "when u going caucasian u will never go Indonesian"
ReplyDeleteMy ex bf is French, now i'm dating an English guy
There are some invalid stereotypes. But yeah, we're somewhat more religious than your western girls. The reasons why not all indonesians want to date bule is because (some) bule seems arrogant and not so loyal
ReplyDeleteif u in yogyakarta,, leet me know,, seem interesting to be discuss about your blog :) dm me :)
ReplyDeletehttps://www.facebook.com/dhesy.bakobat
if i dont read your flog i might going into many flirting strategy from bule
ReplyDeleteI readed the article. Its So-so but not totally false.
ReplyDeleteI readed the comments, and most peoples are really degenerates or close minded as hell.
I went to Indonesia first for vacations, cause everyone back home was saying its an amazing country to see.... Wich is true !
Then i fall in love with the country, and come back later the same year, but got my hand on a social budaya and stayed 6 months.
I datted many girls, always with the intend of serious relationship.
And surprise ! Its not me the bule who was detestable in most cases, but the local girl !
I went for the classic indonesian native to the Indo Chinese girl.
I don't care about your stupid racist feud (Indo vs Indo-Chinese), in the end we are all humans beings with the same genetic roots.
I met very nices girls, polites, gentles, carrings, but the chemistry was just not there.
I met rotten girls, who was into cheating, lying, money. Just went off without regret.
Today, im married to a local girl, her familly is poor, and that was bothering them when we started dating, but i never carred. People value is not in their wallet.
Nowaday we live in indonesia, we have 2 kids, we bought an house, we are happy.
My relationship with her familly is great ! Her mother like me a lot, her father talk to me on equal basis and we often jokes togethers.
Her 2 sisters come to our place often to spend time with us.
My familly back home always impatiently wait for me and my wife to come see them every 3 months with the kids.
I was christian, she was muslim, her familly wanted her to stay muslim, i converted with no regrets.
And you know what ? We met on tinder ! hu hu hu
So yes there is rotten Bule in indonesia, but there is a tons of rotten girls here too, being indo or indo chineses.
But do not generalise, cause majority of them are good peoples, its just we tend to only see the bad one and generalise.
Great response and so true.
DeleteTwo different cultures in Indonesia...i mean between the big international Jakarta and the rest of Indonesian living in small cities. And yes indo chinese girls are different but I have respect for all types of Indonesian girls.
ReplyDeleteAnyway am indonesian but i dont like bule
ReplyDeleteI prefet asian lol especially south korea and japan
But some bule are assholes, i was once meet this guy and sincerely want to be friend with him, and suddenly he asked to have sex, like i don't even show any kind of sexual interest with him nor dressed provocatively. they thought we (indonesian- javanese ) are fool, are our hospitality and kindness were count as flirting ? i don't think so, they just look down on us and think of themselves highly.
ReplyDeletebut some are nice too, especially they who work here for a long time, listen here bules, not all indonesian chicks are after your big D or adore you that highly, we see you as a guest, we treat you genuinely with heart, so be kind, it's not that hard, don't downgraded our girls, treat us right because we are worth it. every girl worth it tbh.
ReplyDeleteLOL THIS IS REALLY AMUSING XDD
ReplyDeletebut it is true for most part lol
Thanks for the entertainment
The comments are actually even funnier then the article, its actually all realitive and all in the eyes of the beholders, persons (people) are individual creatures with individual wants and desires, nothing is set or fixed.
ReplyDeleteI seen many foreigners dating Chinese indo girls and also many dating darker skinned girls, or a mix of both. Some chinese girls look for a sugar daddy also, and this can be a bule guy as well as a chinese or other guy just like some pribumi girls do, it all depends on personal situations and motivations.
I stayed a long time in a Bandung apartment complex and was wondering about the large amount of "single" and pretty young sundanese student females staying in many of the apartments. I found out that many have a rich (often) Chinese sugar daddy who has set them up with the apartmente and who are visiting them on days off or weekends. As soon as the chinese (or maybe sometimes richer Pribumi) guy has left usually their local (young and handsome) sundanese boyfriend came back to visit those girls, this was a very normal and regular sight.
Thanks to all of you for sharing your thoughts. As a bule who first came to Indonesia 20 years ago, I would like to conclude that love has nothing to do with ethnicity or color of skin. If you find your match, you will feel it as long as you are open for it. Travelling around the world has taught me that we should never judge an entire group pf people. Genetically, we are all across the globe extremely similar. Differences are made up by culture, traditions, and personal experiences. However, each and every one of us is unique and deserves respect. We are not stuck in our culture, we can have new experiences and this will change us. Gold diggers can be found everywhere, liars also, as well as criminals. These people will get their receipt later. I prefer to think positive and focus on the positive side of living as a foreigner in Indonesia. And I earn friendship, great experiences, wonderful talks. Life is not only focusing on finding the right match. Life must be lived in a good way, otherwise we will die without having made a difference
ReplyDeleteI agree with u, most of comments are stereotypical and immature thoughts
DeleteI am a black man from Africa, i have been in Indonesia for about three years and still do not know exactly what an Indonesian lady makes of my me and my skin color, i get some nice smiles and acceptance from them but the ones that turn me down are more, one thing i experience more is the this awe look on their faces like i am an alien from another planet.i can not differentiate between the tribes but i think the Indonesian Chinese stands out because of the Chinese look
ReplyDeletesome of Indonesian women are afraid of having relationships with foreign men because they will be labeled as
ReplyDelete"naughty and broken women" because foreign men usually have a free sex culture and has a big d*ck while Indonesian men not (sorry). So mostly if an Indonesian woman is dating a foreign man and then broke up, usually no Indonesian men will look because considered "already loose", so most Indonesian women are afraid of dating foreign men, they are afraid of having no future.
You can have any chick you want in Jakarta, Pribumi will be less expensive unless she is a battle tested hard core Bule Hunter in which case you should avoid at all costs. Indonesian Chinese will have MORE common experiences with the Bule--they travel, usually educated in the West or in schools that teach using a Western standard,comfortable eating some Western foods, etc. However, with the Chinese girls your wallet will need to pass inspection from Mom & Dad because if they are really traditional Chinese then the daughter will get nothing when Papi dies so they want to make sure you can support their little angel. Anyway, just keep in mind, none of the chicks in Indo are chasing your physical endowments they are more interested in the WALLET size. I've heard of blokes who are hung like porn stars but because their jobs are low paying no Pribumi or Chinese girls finds them suitable for a long term relationship because the wallet be too skinny. Regardless of what the women here are typing in as comments, MONEY is what make them smile, everything else is a minor aggravation.
ReplyDeleteI think so
ReplyDeleteAll I know is, the one Jakarta chick I met is a rich broker in her 30's, has kids, cheats on everyone, hooks up as much as possible, does bdsm, gangbangs and still expects you to treat her like a virgin princess and pay for everything, while lying to you about how many cocks she's had since you last met. She looses her mind if you call her the lying, cheating, golddiging whore that she is. She's an AIDS bomb waiting to happen & has an ego the size of the sun, who thinks being a hoe is a talent because she thinks she's a player, not a whore, but how hard is it to hookup when you're an Asian chick and your type is: any White guy of any age who wants to fuck you & pays for your drink, dress, holiday?
ReplyDeleteAnd obviously you are a 25 year old slim handsome rich well endowed intelligent man, so why would she turn you down? Lol
DeleteThat describes almost every chick in Indo. I believe that if you were to take a poll of Indonesian blokes, you would get a similar answer about their experiences as well.
Deleteas an Indonesian female I feel represented hahha.
ReplyDeleteThis is generally true from what I've seen but:
ReplyDelete1. The reason Indo girls who date bule don't go back to local guys is because they are viewed as used and cheap by local guys. They really have no choice.
2. Since most Indo girls get married by 21 if they are 25 plus they are just "leftovers". It's very hard for them to date quality locals so bule becomes the main option. Also bule generally have lower standards than quality Indo guys, they will date almost anything: fat, old, divorced, moms, dark, etc. I've seen it all.
3. If you are a foreigner it's common to fall into a Jakarta or Bali bubble where you think the girls who go to bars and hang out with bule are the average Indo girl. But that isn't even 1% of Indo girls, most foreigners never even realize how real Indo society is because they never go to 90% of the country that is actually quite conservative (in most big Indo cities there are barely even any bars)
4. The article mentions something about Indo girls not thinking bule will pay. But that usually would be because the bule doesn't have enough money compared to a richer Indo guy. In other cases I've seen bule give their Indo girl a monthly stipend. It seems very common esp in Bali. These girls are just "weekly girlfriends" hopping from one bule to the next and getting paid for it along with free food/housing. They are basically just prostitutes.
This comment is SPOT ON! Hate to say it but what this poster has stated is true 90% of the time. YES, there are exceptions but since most bules never get out of the places where non gold digger/bule hunter/south jakarta perek2 go then they never get the chance to meet other Indo chicks who aren't the bule hunter type.
DeleteThis is true. I was on tinder and some Indonesian men there will explicitly say "NGGAK MAU BEKAS BULE" (he doesn't want women who have been with Westerners)
DeleteI bet his dick is tiny hahh
I'm a virgin and i don't want to be around bitter men like that
Indo is only good for easy bule hunter types. Otherwise what the hell am I doing here?
ReplyDeleteIf I want a high society Chinese chick or similar, I can go to Vietnam, China or Taiwan lol
Hallo , I am indobelanda man, born and raised in netherlands. My wife was peranakan , she came in 1967 to netherlands with her family because it was too dangerous for them to stay in Indonesia. I met her on a popconcert in netherlands in 1978. We fell in love, married for 40 years, we got 3 children. She passed away 2 years ago, very aggressive cancer. I am mixed, indo and belanda. But there was never a problem about race . We just loved each other ! And still we do, she from heaven and me from earth. It should be simple and honest, follow your heart .
ReplyDelete