You may have noticed, men seem quite happy in Indonesia. No matter how dumb and ugly they are, there will always be a fair number of pretty and hot girls gravitating around them. Add to that the expat compensation package, the maid, the driver and the cheap flights to Bali and you have everything a man could dream of: Big pay, no chores, hot girls.
On the contrary, life is hard on expat wives or worse, on single women. Thank God (or unfortunately) most of them don’t see what is happening behind their backs. Among the expats that I know, I can tell you that 90% of them, married or not, have had an affair or cheated on their girlfriends with an Indonesian girl at least once. The only ones that are faithful have stopped partying or, it exists, are absolutely, truly, deeply in love. It’s not just some old, fat pervert working in oil. The more often, it’s the good husband, with kids and family. I’ve been out partying for years in Jakarta, 5 days a week, and in each bar I went to, I met tons of them. Go to Bats, go to Red Square, go to Blok M, etc, etc, and you will see them, getting crazy on the dancefloor and enjoying their lives as they never do at home.Some will say that it’s just easier here with girls and I agree. But does it explain everything? My friends are handsome and cool; they could find girls to cheat with in France. They are rich too, they could pay prostitutes. I know they do it in Jakarta, but they would never do it in France. Why is that? Why do Expats start cheating their wives when they arrive in Jakarta? Is it specific to Jakarta?
I see 3 reasons for that:
- In Indonesia, many men can get girls that are way more attractive than what they could have had in their home countries. Not only more beautiful, the girls can be much younger too, and look much younger anyway. These girls are attracted to foreigners for various reasons: Financial stability, attraction for “white” people (and the perspective of having a mixed baby), and certainly also the desire to be with someone less conservative than most Indonesian men. As long as an expat is somewhat cute or nice, he will be popular among girls here in Jakarta, and for some of them, it means they will be able to date girls they are really fond of. When the guy is 40 years-old, just about to undergo a mid-life crisis, he is very fragile and it won’t take long before he thinks about what his life could be with a 25 year-old exotic beauty.
- The nightlife scene in Jakarta is a lot of fun and excitement. There are great nightclubs in European cities, but few are as open and diverse as the nightlife scene in Jakarta. When you are an expat in Jakarta, you rarely have to queue, you always get admitted, you are at the center of the attention, and you can afford booking a table and opening Champagne. This makes the whole experience much more enjoyable. Many people party a lot more here, and therefore meet a lot more new people. As an expat, there is also a good chance that you will be far from your family on many occasions, because your wife didn’t follow you, or if she did, she travels back home more often. These periods are extremely dangerous because guys will go out more, and they will have many opportunities to cheat. Much more than opportunities I will say temptations. Temptation is everywhere, beauty, young-ness, easy relationships…Difficult to resist.
- Traditional girls vs. Modern girls. Most people will tell you Indonesian girls are different. Their behaviours towards men are much more traditional and less independent than that of most foreign women. I think the authority of the man for instance is much more respected and it gives them the feeling of being in charge. The roles within the mixed couple are also more specific. Actually, they resemble those that were assigned to couples in Europe or the USA before the liberalization of women in the 70s. While we may regret that, many men feel uncomfortable with what they perceive as strong, independent, ambitious women. In Indonesia, they will meet girls that correspond more accurately to their ideas of the perfect wife. And once again, they may fall in love quickly.
These are the three main reasons which I think can explain why so many expats in Jakarta start cheating when they arrive in Jakarta. There might be a lot more explanations, but I just thought it was interesting to open the subject because I realized how crazy people become when they arrive here, and I’ve always wonder why this city can create such transformations on people.
The photo was taken from the blog of Erick Brown, which has more info about nightlife in Jakarta: http://erick-brown.blogspot.com/2009/05/blog-post.html.
Very interesting indeed…Why men start cheating in Jakarta? I don’t think it’s because of Indonesian girls, if a guy has to cheat on a girl he will do it, no matter how Indonesian she is! Coz I know a lot of mixed couples and the guy is cheating on his wife (Indonesian woman) with Indonesian girls… I guess it’s much more visible in Jakarta that’s it but the cheating is the same all over the world… Well this is my opinion. Casssandra.
ReplyDeleteI don’t agree with you Cassandra. A guy will not cheat everywhere on earth but only if he encounters beautiful girls as Indonesian are. I am sorry but go I lived 10 years in London and girls are fat and ugly, I would never have compromised my marriage to fuck a fattie. Whereas in Jakarta I must say that girls are very hot and temptation is everywhere. P.
ReplyDeleteI have to agree with the previous comment. There is something special about Jakarta that makes many guys lose their values and moral standards. Jakarta is an evil town!
ReplyDeleteAs the writer of the article said, there are also lots of opportunities in cities like Sydney or London, and no, most of the girls there are not fatties! They are damn hot and desirable. The expats have big salaries and power, so I think they could get these girls if they wanted too. Maybe it would be harder but that doesn't explain everything. And if they aren't attractive anyway, there are prostitutes too in these countries. So why sleep with a prostitute in Jakarta and not in Australia or Europe? I'm not saying there are cheaters only in Indonesia, but we have to admit it is a much bigger issue in Jakarta than elsewhere, and it has lots of explanations.
's not just Jakarta is it though - it happens in Singapore, Hong Kong, Saigon, Bangkok - all over Asia I know guys with local minor wives or girlfriends and guys who go to hookers when they would not dream of it in the West
ReplyDeleteHmmm...Temptation overflows in Jakarta, indeed. However, I must say that some men will stray if they are weak at heart. I believe that men with strong priniples and moral beliefs will think twice before pouncing on the next hottie or giving into the lust and allure from a beautiful Indonesian girl. This all sounds cliche but I have seen my married male collegues treated as kings in bars and clubs in Jakarta. Some of them have exchanged numbers with the girls (shame on them) and some of them have enjoyed flirt inflicted conversations. I'm not sure if the wives know of their hubby's whereabouts during their absence, but I can say one thing for sure. If I were married I wouldn't feel so comfy having my hubby in these places even with a strong marriage. Some of the girls can be quite agressive and stunning! So hard to resist. Bascially, you have to think with your head..ahem brain.
ReplyDeleteSame question as why there's so many girls went to the west to be with their new hubby and starts cheating. LOL
ReplyDeleteI guess the temptation of among other culture and whites as the white among asian girl is strongly have anything to do with it.
hi i just want to add that not all indonesian women like western.
ReplyDeletethere are three types and reasons why some indo women like western:
1. educated career women.
these women are smart, independent, have university degrees, have good career. they work from monday to friday, and clubbing on weekend. they pay their own bills, they buy their own house and car. if these type of woman like western, it's not because of money, better living, or to get cute mixed western indo baby. these type of woman like western because they like you for who you are. your brain, your personality, your attitude. they like western because they treat them equally, not like indo men who put them self upper them woman. they like western because western don't tell them what to do, what to say, what to wear, not like indo men who are dominant to their women. also because western give them freedom to live their life, not like indo men who are very jealous and keep following and controlling their women like a property. these type of women also like western because western admire their indonesian face, their brown skin, their long curly black hair, not like indo men who think dark skin woman is ugly, and the white one is pretty. you will find this type of woman busy at work from monday - friday, but u will also find them clubbing with their mini dress, make up, high heels, and dance all night long. so don't judge all women in mini dress dancing in club is gold digger prostitutes. spend time to talk n get to know before you judge :)
2. gold digger looking for better life and cute mixed baby.
these type of woman are lazy. they want money easily. they will seduce, flirt, chase, basically they will use all their asset to make western man to pay their bills, sending money every month. and if they are get lucky, western will ask them to live in their apartment or asking to marry them. they want to be with western so they don't have to work for money, and they hope western will bring them to their country so they can have better life there, and show off to their friends in indo. and they know that western has more money than indo men. these type of woman don't have good job, they will dress provocatively and go to places where western go, and try to attract western. they might not charge you for sex, but they like you because they want to have better life, not because of who you are.
3. prostitutes.
well, no need to explain this one. LOL.
i also want to tell all western coming to jakarta, some gold digger indo women will chase you, being aggressive or will sleep with you very easily, but NOT ALL INDO WOMEN are gold digger or prostitute. there are some educated hard worker indo women who genuinely like you not because you are a western, but because of who you are as a person :)
-CC-
CC! You rocks!
ReplyDeleteIndonesian girl can't be generalized as a gold digger or prostitutes. This type of woman is exist all over the world! Asia or especially Indonesian became the center of attention in this matter because they are open, warm and friendly. They just right passed you on the street and could give you a big smile.
Western girls, please, unless you smell like money and your face is in Rolex ads, nobody will notice you. Mostly they are cold, bitter and sorry, with very bad skin quality. You think, who doesn't want Asian girls??? Must be crazy.
So, unless you are shallow, insecure and your horizon is only between your country and Asia, man, seriously, you will respect Asian girls for being who they are.
Nonetheless, faith is a faith, cheat is a cheat. No reason, under any extreme circumstances people hurt their life partner heart.
Your own shadow is always the best place to hide...
gH.
CC is explain all loud... hahaha
ReplyDeletefor the only girl in family who's not having fair skin n straight hair, i know exactly how it feel.
plus good education n strong personality, the indonesian guys call me a man trapped in a woman body.
that's explain all...
great buddy but not girlfriend!
where as i can freely speak up/discuss n got flirts from western guy
what a strange world...
and indeed cheats are everywhere..
n it's personal choice
even western man with Indonesian wife/girlfriend with stunning body+beauty+brain can cheat with some less qualified hooker...
why?temptations are everywhere
and if u keep coming to places with temptations, u'll get what u 'maybe secretly' hope soon or later
L
CC...20 Thumbs up!!!
ReplyDeletecheating is an ego
Hi..just wanna adding some facts frm my own experience. I'm working in a company where we change 5-6 expats incharge for about each 2-3years. 98percent are married, and only took bout average 3months for them to have 'indo-girlfrend'. Well, one of them 'pass' the test, but I just found out that he's actually gay...hehehe. And I heard, even now the rumors get to the wifes, so if any husband is about to be assigned to jkt, wifes shud be 'prepare' to able 'let-husband-go wild' for atleast 3years of their marriage life! :D
ReplyDeleteCC.. you rock! but let me add a word 'most' before every 'indo men' phrase you mentioned on your explanation.. but still, you nailed it there! - myra
ReplyDeleteCC,,, you have my vote 100%
ReplyDeleteI personally think that its not just Jakarta- I study in Philippines, and boy its not much different here. It is actually safer for girls here than it is for boys. It doesn't take long for any foreigner to have a Filipino-girlfriend here. Anyway, I personally think it is mostly because Filipino women look at foreigners and see money. They see how their life can be changed. Moreover, it probably also depends on the men in these countries.
ReplyDeleteTemptation might be all around us, but a man who is morally sound, and has values will not cheat on their life partner (love or no love) and a woman who finds out that their man has cheated on them deserves better.
Yes,CC,I`m with you too !
ReplyDeleteI was in the stadium one week ago,just dancing like crazy all night(in this state of mind I`m always far from even thinking about draging a girl),when they suddenly closed the place because there were just too few people anymore.
It was then when a beautiful woman came next to me saying:"I like your dancing,I just have to go to the toilet". But I somehow didn`t hear the "to the toilet",so I just thought that she was leaving the place without me.So I also was about to leave,when I met here at the exit again .
She was telling to me that she was looking after me but that I wasn`t there anymore .
Then she asked me to come home with here,and when arriving at here place,it turned out that she has more money than me(I`m just a backpacker working some time anywhere to get the money which allows me to start travelling again..) .
We spent 3 days together,I fell in love with her because of her personality(and,of course she was good looking),but she really was somebody I would have liked to start a relationship whith .
Finally it turned out that she was hopelessly in love with a french guy(whom,I think, will never join her-why else would somebody prefer to be in Bali,if there was a lovely,intelligent and independent woman waiting for him ?)
So,she left me,I gave her my number anyway,not asking for her number (which is another story...),but she`ll never call me,`cause she`s still chasing this french dream .
Anyway,anything can happen anywhere,an there`s no need to generalize about indonesian/western/men women...right,CC ?
I love Jakarta for its generous,lovely and friendly people you can meet in the streets,not for the prostitutes or the corrupt government,and I`m actually thinking of starting to make living in this loud and polluted town !!!
Me,who loves lonely unspoiled places...
Power to you CC!!
ReplyDeleteyeah... why is this "the desire to be with someone less conservative than most Indonesian men." not being elaborated further?
Really man, life is not just about sex and money - I believe there's something more to it ;)
If you have the looks and (especially for Indonesian girls very important) the height you will have shitloads of hot, sexy indo girls chasing you, NOT for your money.
ReplyDeleteOn the other hand if you are short and not handsome you should not expect that Indonesian girls will even look at you.
Wow, this is a hot topic. I am quite sure many expats whom worked and lived in indo have at least one "experience" with indo girls.
ReplyDeleteMaybe this expat need to know that many of their wives has also cheated on them. These expat wives will also have access to gym, socialising and also hv sex with local dudes.
At one time, I saw my friend's wive in a hotel with indo man and they are quite intimate. So it was a matter of time when the wives will realize that they can too having sex around with indo guy. Especially, when they have the luxury of time to spend around without the hubby.
So think about it, if you found ur wive humping other guy in bed then u shouldn't be upset
Temptation is everywhere, could be in Bangkok, Singapore, Ho Ci Minh, etc.
ReplyDeleteIf you're married and your relation is not so strong enough and you let your husband go to bars or night clubs alone quite often, of course he could see the "beautifuls views". I agree that Indonesian women who come to the clubs try to make them look so pretty, it's very natural for the women. Try to look out of the bars or night clubs, there are many of Indonesian women who are not interested to have a relationship with "bule", because of too many differences (cultures, religion etc) and they prefer to choose "the local one".
I lived in Paris for 5 years and I can tell there are not a few men who cheat on their wifes, not all of them likes to go the bars or night clubs but it happened.
And if some people think that the level of "prostitution" in Jkt is quite high, don't forget that Jakarta is quite a big city also and the population is more than London, Tokyo or Paris.
I believe many Indonesian girls are not attracted to expats. I see the one that most Expats get is social climbers. I think they are ugly. They are more flirty and aggressive towards expat, willing to trade sex to improve their life style. I can see why expats is likely to cheat in Jakarta because they are lonely, go to bars and meet these social climbers girls who is young and aggresive. Most Indonesian girl don't choose bars as hang out place. To see beautiful indonesian girl you should go to pals senayan and plaza Indonesia. These girls have money and don't need to seduce expats to improve life style. You seldom see them walking with expats mostly they are with locals.
ReplyDeleteIt is very sad that these social climber and gold digger Girls has become the faces of Indonesian girls for expats.
ReplyDeleteFact Of most Indonesian girls
1. Mostly bars and clubs are not their favorite place of choice
2. They are much more beautiful then what expat think beauty is, because they like to go to body treatment , cream bath, lulur and salon. Without provocative sexy n luring dress and make up, they are a natural beauty.
3. They make sure not to be sexually exploited. If they decided to sleep with you either because you are decent human being whom she comfortable with
4. They don't screw around with other women's men. It is their code of ethict. Bad karma. They rather walk away then jeopardize someone established relationship.
5. They like to hang out with group of closed circle. They dine and lounge together. They don't like to go alone and meet random stranger guy.
That is the truly faces of Indonesian girl, which sadly expat seldom find. Indonesian guys are lucky because expats seldom breaks enter this closed circle
Ive been there in Jakarta for 3days.Ive went to all the clubs like Stadium(like Zouk),Club36 but nothing compere to Alexis in my perspective .You got to pay about 4 million Rupiah to bring out the girl back to your hotel.Its up to you to choose which nite club to go.Very important to
ReplyDeleteall my fellow friends out there, pls bring your PASSPORT&white card along with you when travel at night by taxi..If not the POLICE will stop and ask for 1 million or more from you with so many unreasonable factors.I experiance it myself so be CAREFUL.. NOTE: 1 million= $150 Sing Dollar
The reason for the attraction is obvious - money! A middle-aged fat white guy, is still a middle-aged fat guy. But when a beautiful Asian girl will have sex with him, or even spend the night with him, for the equivalent price of a cheap dinner for one person in London or Paris, then it's a no-brainer! To do the same thing in Europe, with an equivalent looking girl, would cost €1,000-2,000 (for the night), or €200-300 for 'short-time'. And he'll probably get ripped off by the girl's Eastern European pimp. And probably catch some horrible disease. And she'll blackmail him afterwards... etc. etc. ;-) Just lie back and enjoy what Jakarta has to offer.
ReplyDelete@ CC : you forgot one type of girl
ReplyDeletethe "bule hunters", young girls that not looking for money, not looking for partners that treat her better, they only looking for... partner that happens to be a "bule".
some girls just love to have foreign man as a dating partner just to make them look cool among their friends. they dont care if the man not rich, ugly, stupid, or fat. it's just because the "bule" labels on their face.
well i think not becos of how indonesian girl look like but this is jakarta.big city with big prostitution but dun be naif.i am a carrier woman but i like to flirt expat guy cos i like it but im not hooker or silly woman.
ReplyDeleteI think the main problem to why most relationships between expats and local girls don't work out is the place where both parts meet - bars.
ReplyDeleteMost of bar girls have a low-class background with families living in small villages. Poor education whatsoever. Chances are, they are the backbone of the family, thus making them desperate and want to be expats, who are said to have a high status and a lot of money. A sugar daddy.
The kind of girls you mention in your articles are the kind with no educational background, so how would you expect them to act as educated ones eg. no cheating, man-eater, golddigga or so on? I believe that good girls in Indonesia are thought to not go to bars nor drink.
p.s There is a tiny population of girls that you forgot to mention in your articles - the Chinese born in Indonesia.
Cheers.
Jakarta - Heaven for men, all men...young, old, fat or whatever...as long as you got MONEY. The girls see you as the walking ATM machine.
ReplyDeleteNevertheless, Jakarta offers a very good product at a very cheap price....So just enjoy it
I am an Indonesian woman (36 yeras old) married to a French guy (38 years), been living abroad USA and france for about19 years..I know a lot of Indonesians who married to exparts around me, and they are not in the same class like all those easy girls you could find in the bars in jakarta...Not all Indonesian girls belongs to this negatif category....The negatif category belongs to low class non -educted girls...
ReplyDeleteI just wanna reply to CC, not every Indo-men are like that. And according to my experience, an eastern men who have a mix of "east&western" state of mind actually better than a non mix men. (I'm not speaking about mixed breed here). But, for the adultery itself, many people in the world, not only in Indonesia, will define those women and men as sluts and filthy people. It doesn't matter what type of women/men you are, classy/gold-digger/prostitutes, when you do adultery you are in a wrong position and you should pity yourself.
ReplyDeleteI agree with the post above me. Some bars you mentioned like BATS, and RED Square are the bars that expats would go, therefore these unwell educated girls will certainly go there. Sometimes I can't understand why some of these expats can be attracted to these girls. They dress cheap, wear to much make up, wearing fake branded stuff. From local men point of view some of these girls are beyond ugly. These girls are usually from small village, outside Jakarta that try to make their life better quick by dating expats. By this standard, all the expats who come to Jakarta think they can get any girls in Jakarta easy because of who they are. Sorry pal, you think wrong
ReplyDeletewhich bars yoo recomend to hang out for exparts in jakarta where I can have fun without being annoyed by slutty gurl?..Bats in shangri-la?..how bout The Immigrants?..
ReplyDeleteBats? That is the cave for these sluts. They hunt expats here. If you wanna have an easy pick up, then bats is the place. Nowadays, it's so hard, they are everywhere. Immigrants seems to be better place than bats. You can try Puro or Blowfish too.
ReplyDeleteHey guys/gals,
ReplyDeleteI don't think its so much as loose girls out there. The whole country has a massive population ! There are more females than there are men! What would one expect from that kind of statistics?
I personally have many feminine friends. Guess what? They are not the hunting nor sleasy types! All working class, some professional & some semi professional. Very nice women, great friends to chat with on almost any topic and yes some will/may sleep with you but thats on a strictly personal basis. Maybe it's to relieve stress after a hard day of chasing targets.......who knows!
Why guys cheat? Well, I personally find that the women, here in Indonesia (young or not so young) are simply fantastic! I mean there is more passion & real feeling (although it may be for just 1 night)! You take Manila for instance, it's all very commercial. Same applies in Bankok! I have travelled alot, lived & worked in a few countries. Thus, I feel I am a bit qualified to compare.
Oya, YES, I have cheated too!
you don't have to be good looking to drag women in your bed. Especially indonesian women in jakarta. They are actually lonely and attention seeker. You just have to know how treat women.Indo women are no different. They are pretty liberal.
ReplyDeleteThis is sad. Indonesia may be a third world country but it doesn't mean it's a place where you can do whatever you want! Actually 'Indonesia' might be over-generalising, more like Jakarta. I was born and raised in Jakarta but lived overseas for 7 years. All i can say is if it continues like this, the reality of Jakarta is a shithole. People may rave about it saying its a haven for partying and sex but if thats your idea of heaven then your world is really narrow. Whoever put an "Indonesian Girls" tab in a guide to Jakarta should remove it now. Just because you can't get away with chauvinism (dare I say sexism) in developed countries doesn't mean it's okay to parade it around here. It's called the internet man, the standard for 'dickhead' can cross international borders.
ReplyDeleteThis article is harsh on expats, not on Indonesian women... you should read it twice..
ReplyDeleteSO Simple... Men are pigs, and Indonesian women seem to love things that are not "kosher"... ;-)
ReplyDeleteInteresting article. Not to mention…so true!
ReplyDeleteIndonesian women, in general, are easy and completely vain. They seem to have this inferiority complex of Caucasian men. No matter the physique and/or mental capacity; as long as they can be with a white guy, they are just so proud of it! Simple example – look at any local TV channel. Majority of famous stars are either mixed or completely imported. As long as you have fair skin, you earn the big bucks & fame; even if you have no talent whatsoever or speak Indonesian! I mean seriously, that’s just sad. Not to mention all those ‘whitening’ beauty products in the market. All that obsession about white skinned people…jeeez!
Honestly, I am embarrassed for them, that these women have no value of themselves. Some of them don't even speak English and can't even communicate properly with their expat partners. I've seen that all too often. It's just so demeaning for some of us who actually can hold up an insightful conversation with a man without flashing cleavage or wearing ultra-miniskirts. To brutally put it, it’s disgusting.
As for the Caucasian men, well cheating is cheating. No matter where he may be, if he’s a cheater, he will cheat. Regardless of how easy and slutty the women are, men who already have it in the back of their head with the agenda to cheat, will. If he values his wedding vows and love, he will not. Temptation always exists no matter where you go or what you do. It’s up to an individual to decide what action they’re going to take about it. Can’t fully blame the cheating on the Indonesian women, although there is no doubt that the women here give blonde bimbos a good run for their money.
Emancipation of women and still lowering yourself just to settle with a white guy? Can’t have it all ladies! Remember, if he cheated on his wife/girlfriend with you, he’s definitely going to do it again to you!
basicly cheating is cheating no matter who u re no matter where u frm no matter what the reason is. cheaters are cheaters they re miserable n they re daft i feel sorry for em
ReplyDeleteThis article is nonsense. another example of shortsighted and simple logic that plagues indonesian society. though i guess it grabs the attention of many simpletons and jives well with what they already think.
ReplyDeleteLOL still Chopped & Screwed after all these years, Come on people!!!! *It's everywhere....
ReplyDeleteIs so dang true...I'm Indonesian but live aboard now for long time. I was born n grew up in Indo, and I was shocked 1st time back to Jkt (Jtown) they call it now in bahasa Gaul ( street language) in early 2000 n back in couple times late 2000, went to famous new n old clubs n still amazed with the youngsters Indo gals very wild attitude, just hanged out & wanted to get attention with bule (Caucasian) and of course hocked up n Get a room later, with so easy way for like 1-2 hrs chitchat, as long as bule guys are buying her/them drinks, dancing together...etc..So last but not least, All the exparts, tourists Caucasion or Asian too, are coming to JTOWN definetely will have fun clubbing partying n get any gals with much2x cheaper spending money for sure rather than their home countries. So u gotta watch out ladies/wives if ur man is planning for a trip to Jtown for business or vacay betcha follow him, but of course all depends on the man in person too, but I just saying in general.
ReplyDeleteNot all are like that! if the man is asshole... of course.. no matter the place! Jakarta is nothing compare to Thailand. come On...
ReplyDeleteNonsense Article... honestly speaking.... rubbish
ReplyDeleteit is happen everywhere.. weak up writer!
In addition to that....Wishing they were married to white men, those gold diggers have a hard time seeing happy mixed couples (Indo women and their white husbands). Girls of this type would call/shout "eh pelacur (prostitute)" or "M*m*k (vagina)" or "alah cuma gitu ajah, emang lu doang yg bisa!(you're nothing, I can marry a white man too!)" to an Indo woman and her white husband as they walk past them. I learn this by experience.
ReplyDeleteoh btw, I'm Indonesian and married to a white American.
Interesting article. I have been coming to Jakarta yearly since I was 13years old (now 28) and have meet all types of girls. I have expericanced Indo ladies who drive BMW's and money is no interest to them and just want to have a good time and meet someone new. I have been to Blok M and was harassed which I did not like and have even meet a nice lady from the internet who did not like the bar scene and we just went to the movies and restaurant.
ReplyDeleteThe one thing I did find is most of my friends are local Indonesian that I meet in University and when ever I am out with them it tends to be hookers and gold diggers that chase after me yet when I go some where nice alone I always attract educated ladies who just want to get to know me and have a chat then if it goes further is does if it dose not well too bad. Any local insight to why this is the case. Are the higher class girls less likely to talk to me if I am hanging out with Indonesian guys who also come from a high class?? I am not interested in gold diggers or un educated ladies who offer nothing more then sex.
How is the scene for a Indian guy in Jakarta . Will the indo girls accept them for casual chat / sex . What about the girls who are prostitute how will be there behavior. Pl. let me know your comments
ReplyDeleteI don't think same case would happen to Indian Guy. I mean, most girls in Indonesia (we talk about statistics here, so please calm down) prefer a white guys, Caucasian, for many reasons. For money, for fame, or just because they think white guys will have a wider perspective of thinking and will understand them better and love them for who they are.
ReplyDelete"White" is a plus for them.
But Indian guy is not that famous here. Gold digger prostitute would chase after a white guy, and Indian guys are not "white guy".
Unless you're very rich or really good looking, you don't have a "plus", bro..
-F-
It is still not true that it is easy for any bule to get sexy and hot Indonesian girls like most ppl are advocating here.
ReplyDeleteI am a real bule, white skin, blue eyes, blond hair so that is not the issue. Some people (especially bule) claim that Indonesian girls don't like Arab or black guys but that is also a myth, mostly caused by Indonesian girls telling these bule things they think the bule guys like to hear (i don't like black guys i don't like arab blablabla)
Maybe it is only me but i been 7 years in Jakarta now and i am not particularly handsome, but also not too ugly just average looking. But i am not very tall just round 5.10 (178 cm).
I don't receive a lot of attention from Indonesian girls in clubs or malls or wherever i hang out. I love to go to Red Square and i agree with the posters that it is extremely easy for MOST bule guys to get girls there, every week i go there and i see the same bule guys again with a different hottie but most of the bule guys that pull the girls in Red Square (at least the girls not looking for money) are without exception young and tall guys.
When you go to Red Square you will notice that most bule who go there are TALL goodlooking guys round 28 till 35 years of age, and they are the guys who pull girls every friday and saturday night.
I been many times to Red Square but i hardly ever managed to pick up a girl there (late at night you can pull the hookers there but i am not interested in them) There are really many girls to be had for free in Red Square but they will be taken earlier on (after 2.30 they will all be with a guy) and these girls who wanna have fun are always choosy.
So Indonesian girls are not easy to get for everybody, most bule guys will have no problem getting the hot and sexy girls for free (as many as they want) but there are a few bule guys who will have a hard time getting the nice girls.
Of course the fat and ugly girls in Jakarta will go with anybody, these girls will not judge a bule by his looks
But the sexy and cute girls will not just go with a bule because he is a bule that is bullshit... They will either go with an old ugly guy if he has money (or sometimes because the old fat guy has a lot of charisma then they even go with this old fat guy for free and that happens too) or they will pick a youngish tall guy because of his height and looks for free.
Bottomline Indonesian girls (the hot ones) are just as picky as Western girls
Cheating is cheating and is prevalent anywhere in the world, not necessarily in the Asian countries per se. I am not saying the article is wrong or particularly targeting Jakarta ladies. Even the Indonesians here cheat on their wives. I guess the law has to catch up to protect the expat and local ladies who expect the husbands to remain faithful to them. If the penalty or compensation is large enough, it will deter cheating.
ReplyDeleteVM
It is really very simple and ruled by 3 laws:
ReplyDelete1. Supply and Demand:
Here you have one group: male, well-off, new to SE Asia, a sex symbol in SE Asia, maybe married, maybe not.
Here is the other group: female, young, gorgeous, generally good upbeat attitudes, sense of humor, generally poor and badly educated, looking for a way out of their dead-end jobs with little pay and no prospects, many do not like Indonesian men, want to be free and happily married to a preferably well-off man.
2. Men think about sex almost all the time:
Men want and need love, but we really enjoy a good fuck without any strings attached and no commitments. Kindof relieves the pressure every now and then.
3. When men enter a new city or country they always have to feel like they have conquered it, and then conquer it some more. There's nothing better than yea olde pillage and rape. Preferably with alot of alcohol and many young, beautiful, willing women.
Rest my case.
B
actually, types that can be seductive girls met at a bar or club is not native to the jakarta. most of them were villagers who were brought to Jakarta.
ReplyDeleteWell, i think Indian men get Indonesian girls quite easily considering the amount of money they are willing to offer. Some of the good looking Indians get girls without spending too much. Cheating is so common over here that it has become like a trend, whether it is bule, Indian, Arab or even Indonesians....
ReplyDeleteWhat about just divorcing the jerks , and tell the kids why plus with the cost of a divorce here in US wouldnt be to much left for those hores
ReplyDeleteThey sure make them feel as a king (old middle fat men) as long as the wallet is full
ReplyDeleteNobody is a prophet in their own land
Infidelity occurs everywhere in the world. Expatriate men who travel for work in Indonesia are more tempted to cheat because the female ratio outnumbers available men. The girls are exotic, bold, their dress style is generally prevocative and if you know any sexual psychology it's a known fact that men are visually stimulated. Then add into the equation the subservient charm of these girls. What a great combination for the middle aged man who is going thru mid-life crisis & needs a fix. Unfortunately, I lost a 28 year marriage, a business parnership, and my Best Friend. So I question the morals of these girls.... they may not be sluts or hookers, appear very demure & thoughtful...BUT they certainly give no thought to the fact they are breaking up a marriage and home. So underneath what are their real morals and values in life?
ReplyDeleteCheat or no cheat, it's all depending on the person no mater what is their sex, color, country or whatever. No issue. Close the subject.
ReplyDeleteI more interested in the above second picture with the two young hot sexy girls dancing with topless. Can someone let me know which club was the party held. I like to see the girl with the jeans, her face and her hair so sexy. But they doesn't look like an Indonesian girl. Wish my hands was on top of her tit. :-)
Someone please let me know the club name and the location. Thanks Bro.
Jakarta here I come.....
Azrai, Kuala Lumpur
okay, seems to me that there are so many comments in this topic. I think the owner of this website should start making an event, match making event where the invitations are for all single Indonesian and expats. It's not a free event, entrance fee should range around 100 k - 500 k depends on location and place. and so let's see where it goes..... it should be a good event where the good ones will meet each other, whereas a serious relationship is on demand, and start making the 'real' testimonials, rather than just opinions.
ReplyDeletejust my thought, cause it is difficult to really find 'the good one' for 'a good one' in this city.
mauuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu.....
ReplyDeleteits all about money, i dont think so when u approached by young sexy girl and tell her "honey, i dont have money will u gide me in your kost from the immigration?" she will stay near you... pls note, western has better life here, pay good, has mad, driver, nice house, what else?? and the girl think if the western attracted by them, who kmow one day the estern guy will take them out of country...
ReplyDeleteThe writer confuse something for fun (the guy just wanna hv a fling, the girl just wanna try something) with something serious (family, financial prospect).
ReplyDelete99% of Indonesian women are looking for husband NOT by going to the bars n clubs! Someone has to confirm the number ;)
They will pick an average indo man who turn to have many lands, any local or collar or some corporate exec, guys at church, mosque, local govt officials, those are, in the eyes of indo women seriously looking for husband, are more prospectous than foreigners @the bar. Why? Simple, Because they think the guys who went to the bar wont be at their side when they are pregnant ;)
hahhaahahaha... dare i say that is it true? well some truth and some myths... i agree with everyone here.
ReplyDeleteI know from my own experience that the cheating goes for not only to the expats but for local indo men as well...
and yes. i have to admit that most indo girls are attracted to foreigners. good looking or not, rich or poor... they dont have to be sluts, they cud be socialites as well... "bule" or not.... btw, not all indo girls are aggressive.
im a regular indo girl, and no i dont chase after white dudes... thr have been flirting incidents with old OLD expats . surprisingly, i've never been the one who initiate the talk. yeah... never did i ever "lower" my self EVER by flirting back somehow. Maybe because my mom always tell me not to talk to strangers. we are not all seductresses
oh yeahh... i wanna comment on one more thing :p
i think indo girls r mostly attracted to:
1. bule and east asian guys (japanese and korean particularly) ... ANY RICH GUY
2. middle eastern
3. blaaahhh how shud i know hahahahaha any good looking hunks out there obviously
-indo chick -
Women are the same all over the world. They want the following...
ReplyDeleteA man that respects them.
A man with a job.
A man who is nice.
A man who is wise with his money.
A man who doesn't hit him.
A man who doesn't control him.
A man who is romantic.
A man who is fun and light hearted.
So to say Indo women are just digging for gold or a better life is partially true because EVERY WOMAN IN THE WHOLE WORLD WANTS A GUY WITH A GOOD JOB. Duh! It's how you comfortably raise a family. So apparently every marriage in the whole world is about money and NOT how you feel about the person? Give me a break. Expats got a lot going for themselves compared to your average Indo man.
The reason Expats are so happy with Indo women is the following:
Western women have become fat pigs. This is statistically true.
Western women don't want to speak or make eye contact with you unless you're perfect.
Even the most barely pleasant looking chubby American woman has been told over and over again that she's hot by a million sheet rockers and truck drivers and it's gone right to their heads. These guys do this because they live in the middle of no where on a massive island and they only get 10 working days off and they are not gonna spend 3 days traveling to Indonesia so they SETTLE for the best that they can get in their little world which is dog meat.
Even the frumpiest of the Western women think they have great value and will make you work for just the slightest act of human kindness. Example: Tammy who is 39 years old, divorced, has 1 child and is chubby as hell ACTUALLY BELIEVES that she is a woman who has great value. She doesn't realize that her glory days are over, her baby making years are gone, her body is sagging and gooey and her value as a woman has dropped massively. But STILL she will make poor Glen who's never left Wyoming jump through hoop after hoop just to have a conversation. Ha!
Men love Indo women because...
Indo woman are really fun in every regard.
Indo woman love to make love.
Indo woman are traditional (not submissive, there is a huge difference)
It doesn't take much to make a Indo woman content
Indo women look like women, not dudes such as a the trend in the States these days.
Because Indo women are traditional they know how to take care of their men.
Expats cheat because they are not getting what they need at home and Indo women hit EVERY base in this regard.
Here a good example of what a Western man endures...
There is a photographic company called Glamour Shots in America where many chubby or fat housewives go to have their picture professionally taken. They get their make-up done by a make-up artist, they get their hair done and they squeeze into a fancy, sexy, dress that makes them look 15 years younger and a lot slimmer. They bring these "sexy" photos home and give them to their husbands so that the husbands can see what his wife could look like every day if she gave 2 sh*ts but she doesn't.
Most Indos women look great EVERY DAY! Heels, lipstick and great hair, great body and a easy going spirit.
Nuff said.
SuperBukowski
You forgot to mention that all of these young beauties fuck around behind their dumb expat men's backs just the same...Enjoy the fun but don't get upset when you find your Indo girlfriend or wife is fucking your mates too.
ReplyDeleteWell what can I say, my husband was only a few months in Jakarta , while I was at our home country.He started acting strange and began to lie. After 25 years of married life he decided to married this young indo girl, while we are still married. The have child now, we still are married he does'nt want to come and get divorce! My children and I are heartbroken because our family were very close. What I can't anderstand is how he could marry her there while still married!
ReplyDeleteTheir marriage in Indonesia might not be legal since he is still married with you. Some people here hold a religious wedding ceremony but it has no legal power before the law. What is your husband citizenship and who sponsored him to stay in indonesia? If i'm not mistaken it is only the company he works for or a legal wife who can sponsor him. So, you may speak to your embassy and see if there is anything you (or they) can do to get your husband deported back to your country and get the divorce that you deserve. Make him poor, sweetheart ;)
Deletesad but true
ReplyDeletei always think this cheating thingy works both way. it always takes two to tango, darlings. and i am agree to someone up there saying expats cheat because they are not happy back home.
ReplyDeletei feel sad for indonesian girl, we are all labeled slutty and bitchy and stuff, while it's actually only a generalization. those ayam girls are uneducated, and i like this blog because it is spreading awareness about indonesian gold digger. and btw, you can actually find a really nice decent indo girl if you look really carefully ;)
-D
Well, I think that some women are too easily labelled "gold-digger." It takes money to rent the services of a hooker. It takes money for a one-night stand. It takes money to "see someone." It takes money to have a girlfriend. It takes money to have a wife. And even if you never spend a dime on her and you're both "financially-independent," you still have to have money to even BE "finanically-independent."
ReplyDeleteIt's time for people, in general, to maturely take a look at the role of money in relationships and admit that the romantic fairytales and expectations are all BS. It's about having an emotional connection and having the economic ability to meet the material needs of sharing day to day life together while experiencing this emotional connection. Women are the ones who think ahead and wonder how things are going to be provided for while men are only concerned about getting their boner off and for this, women are called "gold digger?" Come on!
I mean relationships should never be all about money. As I've said, it's about an emoitional connection. But having fun takes CASH. If a man has a job, some money in the bank and is committed in a relationship, then being handsome or cute should only be secondary considerations to a woman. I mean, she can always wake up in the middle of her life and discover that Mr. Cute and Handsome is now Mr. Broke and Irresponsible or she can wake up on the same morning with Mr. Secure and Responsible. He may not be the most handsome guy in the world, but he sure gets the bills paid on time. LOLOLOL!
In other words, don't confuse a "gold-digger" with a woman who is realistically assessing, in her own mind, what it's going to make a relationship happen.
ReplyDeletedo indo ladies like black men or is it the usual sterotype?
ReplyDeleteDoes anyone have the name of a good private investigator in Jakarta who can get photos, etc.. I need this urgently.
ReplyDeletejust sluts for those who CANT get a women in their own country.......Sorry Guys but if you are one of those who can get the hot chick here.... go there to find a slut and for all of those MARRIED men like my husband, go there to cheat since you probably want to do it very far from home so you can play the perfect dad and husband.....
ReplyDeleteI guess this is the perfect excuse for us wifes to start cheating too :)
as an arabic guy 24 y.o ( saudi arabia )i dont agree with cc on the indo man points
ReplyDeleteif i am in love with a woman i am saving my self to her even if i am not in love with her i would never cheat because of my commitment if i like another woman i would never do it secretely thats if she is ( the other woman ) honest, funny, take good care of a man.
i am a man i would never expect a woman to be self dependent ( finincially ) i must work hard to provide clothing,food,gifts....etc
i like to feel that the woman needs me around her cause i'll be there i like to be in charge , responsible.
i am travelling to indo on 30 NOV and i will never use my platinum dagger LOL on a hooker because:
1- she must be sick or forced to do that.
2- she's like a train i will never ride.
3- she is selling her own flesh and Dignity what more should i expect!!
to be honest i like talking to weastern's (boys,gals) i like the way they see things ( not every thing ) thats doesn't means i agree on every thing
i think this is enough iam not the type of a guy who would say anything that crosses his mind
just wanna make a point
( stay a man with Dignity and sex is not everything, dance with them flirt but don't take to the max ( masterbate instead u will thank god you did'nt have sex ))
aashg_srab@hotmail.com
sulaiman
Just the reason why I don't want my boyfriend to come and live/work in Jakarta! Even the expat guys I know, who are actually nice as friends, have had 'a taste of blok m', once or twice.Or more. I trust my boyfriend, but I don't trust the other girls out there. Ha!
ReplyDeleteMind you, I've been to BATS and Red Square (never got picked up! I seemed to get more luck when I used to go clubbing in Oz - haha). Just went there and watched as the world went by. I just sat and drink with a bunch of friends and 'people watched'. Amazing to see the many 'transactions' that happened in one night. It was an interesting 'urban anthropological' experience.
all girls in jakarta want a visa OUT to the west. period. even the office girls want out, they all want the american dream. period. any of you 'guys' who say otherwise are just naive and should grow some balls.
ReplyDeleteI own an office and I don't want American dreams. Period. Why are you here chasing Indonesian dreams anyway? Grow some balls and Go back home already.
Deletewell.. should agree to what CC has wrote.. but based on my experience, I'm an Indo woman and I like western guy since I was in high school.. I always think that I'm intimidation for local guys because local guys mostly don't like Indo girls who is much smarter than them. I was married to a mixed Indo Greek guy and have 2 sons..,I'm 36 years old but looks like 26 (that's true) but get divorced because he thinks that I'm way above him in anything..and he can not keep up with me. I never cheated because marriage for me is not something to be fooling around.
ReplyDeleteIn a strange way.. many western guy attracted to me because of my brain, even when I was still married. well.. I was best student in my univ, good job in men business (steel contruction), well english speaking, I can talk about many thing, I don't like clubbing, I like read.. I like outdoor sport.. tomboy, but I was winning beauty peagant that I really hate only because my mom wants me to be a bit feminine. So I think I have the "looks"
But you know.. that those all western guy who attracted to me all of them are well educated, smart, attractive, and polite.. no clubber expats, and they are really nice and respect me in all my opinion.
So.. I should add here that :
Some expats also have good taste of girls not only the way they are so hot.. but they think we are sexy because we have brain, we are smart, we can talk about many things and discuss everything.. and this is the most important thing "be what you really are.. be natural, be honest.. don't fake things.. don't try to live in superficial way.." that won't stay forever.
and Oh.. now I have french boyfriend, a gentleman, attractive, smart, and like me because I never try to be someone else. And he's so close with my sons.. I've been invited to France last month to meet his brother, all his friends, even dinner with his best friend who is also his boss..
Maybe my case is exceptional but for serious girls who want to meet good expat guy (there are still many out there):
1. Place where you meet is important
2. You can see what is behind their minds with first talking to them. not flirting to them and drag them to bed
3. Keep your eyes open if he's always escape when his phone is ringing (it's alarm for you girls)
4. Just be what you are !! if they turn they head around, then they not really like you.. but they just after for that sex thing
Good luck peeeeps !!
Agree with you (above comment) even i know that I'm also an Indo woman and I like western guy since I was i was at uni in Hawaii but not all indonesian girl is a "gold digger"; want to have a passport and some US/UK VISA.....
ReplyDeleteyou still can find a good indo girl around you :)
damn! this is so silly! i am an educated rich girl from Jakarta, im 24 years old! omg.. this blog is stupid! and i dont like "white" type of guys! i dont need and want their money, their fame and else! Jesus
ReplyDeleteNot only in Jakarta..around the world it happens..and just because happens in Jakarta nowdays..I'm living a broad..but man specially western is same here..is bullshit..they got the benefits more than asian..still they make stories..wow..salut to this "bule"thing..tsk tsk wake up..!
ReplyDeleteAnonimus - maybe you meaning wrong. I can get lot of girls here in my country , but Im in love in Indonesian girl.....
ReplyDeleteI actually think there is a pretty simple explanation for that. It's not a question of Indonesian girls (don't get me wrong they are pretty and all, but so are the women in all the other countries of the world). It has more to do with the fact that the expats tend to come from more developed countries, and the women in those countries, tend to be much more independent, self sufficient ladies living comfortable lives, who do not need the man to provide for them so they don't pay as much attention to the men (for monetary reasons) as in some less developed countries. So this makes it harder for men to get laid in the first place. Therefore when they come to a country where girls will throw themselves on them (because many of them will just see the expats as a wallet on two legs or a promise for a better life) the guy's ego will get so high they'll just think they can do anything therefore taa daaa cheating comes along. This is a pattern in so many less developed countries in Asia, Latin America, Africa, Eastern Europe, not just in Indonesia. (And I don't mean to say that girls in less developed countries are all easy and gold diggers, it's just that women in more developed countries have more opportunities to realize themselves independently of a man that's all).
ReplyDeleteUnfortunately, the reality was all white guy didn't go out with hot indonesian girl.. hot indonesian girl are really hard to get just like most girls around the globe.. this is reality, face it! fantasizing is easy, reality not..
ReplyDeleteYes i agreed! with the above comment, hot girl only go out with hot guy and this is happening everywhere and u dont need to take this story anywhere as simple as that. Hot indonesian couple, hot american couple, hot british couple back in their country.. they don't need mix baby coz they know they will make hot babies! as simple as that, why took it anywhere?
ReplyDeleteLets face it. Its all economics. Thailand, Philippines,Vietnam, Cambodia, Indonesia, the girls seek financial security, an intelligent foreigner, and a good life with the hope of moving abroad one day. Why otherwise would a beautiful 25 year Indonesian girl marry a Quasimodo aged 65 or more.
ReplyDeleteFor the foreigner, life is good here. Prostitutes cost 20% of what they cost in Europe, renting an apartment for the "tussie" is cheap, and if the European wife has reached 50, guess its time for a vehicle change anyway.
to add to the above comment, in case they happen not to make hot babies, there is always plastic surgery as a rescue lol
ReplyDeleteIt is sad but it's true.. It is very popular in Indo cause of the poverty. Not just because of the money, some Indo married non Muslim men I know, that lives in Indo, 90% have secretly cheated on their wife. is it better for a wife not to know? Men should limit himself and make sure doesn't bring home diseases. Best advise is do not start. Once start the addiction and curiousity may not be cured in long term.
ReplyDeletenice posts and interesting....
ReplyDeleteHowever tendency is negative from both sides.
Offcourse there are the exceptions.
My experience with this subject is that yes it is dificult to not cheat whilst in JKT.
Yet I won't cheat if I would be happy with my current lovelife back home. Girls in JKT from my point of view are to be divided in sincere and not sincere. Not sincere have double agenda (economical, develpoment etc)and sincere are truly interested in'Bule'.
The latter mostly have job, well educated, independance and can speak english.....
As I am open person I like to get to know many people all around the world. This is always fun.....
In JKT however it gets an extra dimension as the girls are soo sweet and open and also intimately interesting. Going out is a joy always but if alone in JKT incomparible...... Not talking about sex only.....
As long as you're open and honoust about background and intentions it is pleasant to hang out and njoy.....JKT
Men with bad self-esteem cheat. It's about trying to build that esteem by catching good looking girls, but what they don't realize is this wrecks their self-respect totally and keeps the self-esteem low in the muds.
ReplyDeleteI have been betrayed in a couple of relationships long ago, but I have never cheated even though things were really bad with some of them. I would let myself down the most in such situation and I wouldn't give any value for myself anymore if I had ever done so. But then again, I have always thought I could get about anyone I want (but is this healthy self-esteem either?) ;)
I feel all this applies to both men and women; everybody wants to feel wanted and popular. So, pull your chin up and respect yourself! :)
Cheating - marital infidelity. Who made this rule that after marrying a man can only have sex with one woman for the rest of his life?
ReplyDeleteBule
Cheating happens in many places in the world. Go to China (I live in Shanghai), go to Hong Kong, go to Manila, Brasil etc. It is not only in Jakarta. Beautiful girls are in many countries. Many Asian ladies looking for a white guy for various reasons (money, mixed baby, different life etc). I am living in Asia for 9-10 years, visit many countries and cities in Asia and Europe/US.
ReplyDeleteI married an American who I thought a very nice decent gentleman, very religious guy. I just found out two months ago, after 31 years and 3 children later, that he frequented prostitutes a lot when we were seriously dating and soon after we got married. I have been a faithful and best wife I could be. What's wrong with men????
ReplyDeleteLOLOL... everything that he talks about happens all over the world... .. but Jakarta sounds EXACTLY the same as Thailand.... ill be in Jakarta very soon... and i CANT WAIT BABY... ohh yeah... im gonna try to sleep with 5 girls in 5 days.. hehe.. hope i can do it... =D
ReplyDeleteone nite stands is everywhere, america, holland, japan, canada, white woman or man, black, brown, yellow. all is depend to your personality and morality. i believe hardly of you here care about moral anymore
ReplyDeleteHey -CC- you very much right indeed!!..
ReplyDeletethe richer and dumber you are, the more likely indonesian women will hog you..
ReplyDeleteIndonesia is paradise indeed ! I have traveled throughout Asia and Jakarta is the best for partying and gorgeous girls. I have spent time in Bali and Lombok with Jakarta girls it is a wild ride. I love Indo ladies they are sweet, smart and witty ...Terema Kasih Chantik Bahenol !
ReplyDeleteMy Husband of 30 years has been lured away by the most manipulative Indonesian woman, she befriended me just to be with him, it took her 18 months, her husband told me she was obsessed by him and altough my husband and I thought she was a little odd we put it down to cultural differences. She is a very odd looking woman and some Asian woman I work with believe she has " charmed " him, has anyone else ever heard of this ? She left her husband and 2 young children to be with him ( although they dont live together full time ) Family and friends are shocked and bewildered by what has happened, we had a happy marriage and thee devastation to myself and our children has been horrendous.
ReplyDeleteNobody's here talking about a "hijab women"? They a lot and interesting, too...
ReplyDeleteRtk
It's not only in Jakarta...but Bali too! Sick.
ReplyDeleteSick, Sick!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteI am an indonesian woman who live in melbourne for more than 2 years. I see white guy here a lot. Still, i can only say:"that guy is good looking, cute, handsome..etc.."..but to fall in love and start a life with one of them? wooohooooo...waaaitttt..they are not man enough for me!!!
ReplyDeleteI agree with Joel. One more thing to add. My partner was one of the victims lured by an Indo w...e He came back to me and our children, sort of regretting his adventure. He apologized, I suppose. He also told me that he'd always respect his indo f..k. Well, considering she went for a married guy with kids, knowing well about the fact, he must've been referring to some unknown type of "respect" I've never heard of before. Blow to my pride and self respect. I guess. But I decided to be strong and intelligent enough to forgive him and try to rebuild our relationship. Unfortunately what gets me is his attitude & the sex quality has dropped to a most boring level. He's lost all the flair. To any european lady he'd be a spoiled meat. Closer to animal world in a "humanity-step back" fashion. I'm seriously thinking to go back to Civilization and get myself a real man, leaving "this" to be serviced by the indo penis worshippers.
ReplyDeleteJust thought that someone should at last point it out to those indo "hotties" who in all their sweet ignorance, actually do more damage to their pray than it's obvious. You're actually turning them into chauvinists, you so want to escape from. Haha
And all the keen men who before Jakarta, used to pride themselves as "hot and sexy" - be warned, that was in the past!
No quality comes for cheap, not in this world. Haha
expats will start cheating coz those women are cheap and more beautiful than their wife... and you can find those kind of women in every developing country ...
ReplyDeleteto Austria Indo guy, for sure there are many good non Indonesian girls who like Asian features with a Western educated mind :) you are too smart for the locals hehe
ReplyDeleteLesson learnt: You can never trust a man (They are weak human being)... Be with them, have fun and love them if you want, marry him if you wish. BUT, NEVER TRUST THEM. Allow yourself, woman, to have a bit of "FUN" too... ;)It is worthed.
ReplyDeleteAlso, take care of yourself seriously. Be as healthy and beautiful as you can be. Do this only for YOU - NOT because of someone else (MAN).
If a girl ever steals your man, there’s no better revenge than letting her keep him. REAL MEN can’t be stolen.
ReplyDeleteIf your husband loves you and is honourable. It just doesn't happen. I accept that my man may be titillated by the beautiful, younger women in Singapore. That is human nature. I also appreciate as a western woman in Singapore I am practically invisible in this country. But that's okay too. Ironically, my husband is young and very attractive. It's usually the old, paunchy, tattooed Western guys that have a pretty Asian girl on his arm.
ReplyDeleteMrs ExPat Wife :)
Why dont women just accept the double standard?
ReplyDeletethat seems to be the main problem here
accept it and move on
its the price of admission for your kept life, easy street on a platter , maid, money, whatever
if i was a kept man, like an expat wife is
id let my wife screw whatever stud she wanted
Who's got the money has that privelage
accept it or else go earn your own crust and see which is easier
People are cheating evrywhere no matter man or woman.this depand of situation..
ReplyDeleteand this not about Jakarta.
This Bullshit
I questioned the accuracy of this article. By saying "many expats", the writer should be able to have some kind of statistic, or else, I would say, this is a complete bullshit.
ReplyDeleteMrs Expat Wife - Singapore is as different as red wine is to beer. Indonesia (anywhere that has a bar that is aimed at expat men) is the problem. And Rev - I also worked in Indo - I actually earned more money than my husband - so by your standards that means that I should have cheated. Unfortunately my husband, father of my 3 children, good looking, smart etc was treated like a god over there. I was treated like an unclean, selfish (considering I worked I was obviously stealing a meal ticket) woman.
ReplyDeleteI think all 3 of his points hits home, and to the guy before me - how's this for a statistic. Only 2 from the hundreds upon hundreds that I knew - didn't fall for it (these statistics based on questioning of my husband once he was found out at home). It is so not crap.
I have also lived in other Asia countries - Indo is the worst. In one place we lived there, there is only 1 other couple still married - the rest have been traded in.
I have thought of starting an anonymous blog called - real ex-pat housewives - so people could guest post their real experiences.
Therapy before, during and after might help. But it has nothing to do with how good looking the wife is, as love and sex are not the same with a man. And I'm not just saying that.
I'm slim and good looking Continental European, very realistic indeed. My husband who travels around the world a lot, cheated only in Jaka. That city should have a red-juicy-vagina as its symbol.
ReplyDeleteThe women there come from a traditional muslim background-charming little things, so sweet & innocent. Brought up with an inclination to celebrate sex as holy, swallowing the sperm as sacred- fun loving & open-mouthed... minded creatures. Isn't there a man who forgets his name when facing this?
Yet, there is a twist in their attitude towards marriage: “conditional divorce” or ta‘liq al-talaq, It was meant to give women certain freedom, yet as it proves it breeds beasts inside the heart of the indo society. It also explains the disdain with which they treat their native men.
These are the "standard conditions of Indonesian marriage contract, and the wife may also add further conditions. According to this agreement, if the wife notices any conduct of her husband which violates the stipulated conditions and if she takes her case to a religious judge with evidence supported by the testimony of two witnesses, then the religious judge pronounces that the proclamation of divorce has come into effect and she is divorced."(http://www.law.harvard.edu/programs/ilsp/publications/nakamura2.pdf)
Easy-cheezy-lemon-squeezy- crust earned!
How is that for any standards Rev? Just make sure your Indo wife adds as many conditions to your marriage contract as to let your crust turn to ashes instantly. Guessing: you are an under-loved, over-nourished on growth hormons child of parents with double standards, who were far too busy fornicating around, to teach you where & how to seek real values in life. Trying to fill your deep hole with cheap love? It's good you are doing it far away from lands where people value real Love. At least a few pure hearts are safe from breaking.
BTW, my lawyer likes your line. Might use it as an aid during a divorce case, to win majority of possessions, for female clients who happen to end up expat wives in Indo. And why waste time and resources on therapists if lawyers can make life easy instantly, without having to earn any crust.
You see... all women around you accept your double standards with no problem at all
I have lived in USA for 12 years, and I can tell you, the American men who dated Indonesian girls, usually only got the gold digger women, the women with no dignity, and VERY ugly looking. They would wear provocative clothing to seduce the western men. I've met a lot of rich Indonesian girls who went to study in USA, a lot of them are very pretty, educated, daughters of prominent people in Indonesia, and they would NEVER marry western men, they'll choose Indonesian men instead. These "trash" women, the ones that do not appeal interesting to Indonesian men (because they look cheap and ugly), goes to western men for their money.
ReplyDeleteSince when does this became a chatroom? geez guys, get a (chat)room
ReplyDeleteI don't think many foreigners will marry a bargirl from Blok M, B.A.T.S. etc, every idiot knows, you'll get yourself into trouble with a girl like that. These bars are just for fun.
ReplyDeleteProbably only Indo men are jealous and write negative about their female fellow citizens married with foreigners. If you think these girls are all bad, what do you care???
ReplyDeleteyou hit the nail on the head CC
ReplyDeleteIn the apartment I live there are many old expat men with young Indonesian girls. It always makes me feel so sad and hope they wont reproduce as there is no love between them.
ReplyDeleteThis site is very depressive to read.
ReplyDeleteLove, Fun, Intimacy Those are real life values that you have to work really hard to get. You are plain stupid if you think you can forge them And before you even do the work on getting those values you have to work hard to become someone with a Soul. Anybody can do it and no money is required. Anybody can be human to the fullest potential.
But in Jaka, I would not even compare this to animal's behaviour. It's simply rotten meat paying money to younger, already rotting meat for rubbing at each other. You are simply telling me that these women are better slices of meat than your wife. Allow me, must vomit!
These women fornicate around, then pretend to participate in their religious celebrations, like Ramadan and when it's over they go back to 'rotten meating".
Or you drug yourself to simulate good feelings you could have everyday if you cared about your soul's needs more than your genitals'. Similarly you commit all this "fun" and go back to your wives and children, giving them your diseased body and soul.
What does your religion say about the extent of your humanity? According to Muslim religion, married men and women should be stoned to death for extramarital sex. Clearly, some people can only resemble humans when forced to, by fear for example.
NO, I don't even want to go to your city, let alone live there.
That city took my husband, my childrens father and our future! He is still married to me but also married a indo women and had children with her! He is in his middel age and maybe his menopuse, she young could be his daughter! We did'nt see him for five years now, it is if we don'nt exist for him!
ReplyDeleteDear expat ladies, cheating expat-husbands not only had happened to you, but was also part of my life as a local Indonesian woman.
ReplyDeleteMarried a single expat-man, which apparently busy had lunch, dinner with all these ladies.
I divorced him.
I met another expat, and now moving to Europe following him as my husband. He's been an honest man during his life in Jakarta.
Indonesian is the 4th/5th most population country in the world - so yes, within the same ratio, will be more husband-stealers in Indonesia compare to other countries.
Divorce your unfaithful husband, ladies.. and find another one which will treat you better and loyal to you. Believe me, they do exist.
x
Hmm.. Very interesting topic.. And for Cc,,you rocks!! Lol..
ReplyDeleteAnyway, it depends tho.. I'm tired of the brand for Indonesian girls "foreigner hunter",well maybe i do haha,,but not for money.. Im studying in Holland,in scholarship now.. I am ex flight attendant too.. I have German bf,,met in Singapore.. But,sometime i think it also freak indo girls,,that their foreigner bf will just have stereotypical thought about indo girl.. Hmm well,,i have a lot of foreigner friends in my surfer community and so.. So silly that they got into "indo girl trap" (duh,but true),,chasing the money then bye bye honey.. So for foreigner guys who fall in love with indo girl,,please be picky at least a bit.. Don't just starting your chin wag,then have sex with any girl.. ;)
..
Xxx -indo girl
Not all foreigners gotten the "bad breeds", I have seen some foreign men gotten to marry some daughters of prominent business leaders here in Jakarta. (if my memory serves me right, the daughter of Indofood owner is married to a foreigner)
ReplyDeleteI do however notice that those foreigners who got the hands of these beautiful "top breeds" are likely to behave very gentlemanly and not screwing around the bars doing sexcapades. They are much more conservative and quiet compared with the "usual" foreigners...
I believe all women and men around the world are the same, good women seek good men. If you hang out in those places where those gold diggers linger, ofcourse you'll attract them.
On the other hand, if you happen to hang out where good girls visit, you will also attract them....
But indo got too many good nice daddy's girls who are easy to be fooled by foreigners. Got them pregnant and leave them be, so typical foreign men's attitude...
there are also some well behaved foreigners who owned business in Jakarta.
ReplyDeletei've met some of them.
wooz.. such an interesting topic.. why everybody see indo girl in a very bad way? i am an indo girl and do have a nice single foreigner boyfriend, but i don't want people see that every indo girl are just gold digger.. im not. i have enough money to take care of myself.. so just don't make any judgement on indo girl.
ReplyDeleteWhat about expat women in Jkt? Do any of them meet educated Indonesian men and fall in love, or just trouble? Or Only male gold diggers the trend? And probably married? Asian man so handsome, especially Indonesian..... My friend says.
ReplyDeletei am with an indo girl and she is mathematically about 1500x richer than I am. Just be a real man but also fundamentally a good man and anyone would have a chance with anyone else.
ReplyDelete^^she obviously wants a mixed indo-western baby
ReplyDeleteMen and women are simply wired differently. Men like to have sex with lots of pretty, fertile women. Women tend to want to be emotionally attached to one man in a family rather than have many men as partners. It's the result of evolutionary biology, not some religious notion of sinful lust.
ReplyDeleteIn ancient China, the Emperor had thousands of concubines, and successful men supported several concubines. Accept that this is nature, ever since the beginning of man. You cannot change nature.
Lust is lust and that is a sin!
ReplyDeleteI'm Indonesian girl, Im hot, and Im sexy, I go club and dance in the podium. my dad owned an oil factory. expat always sends me champagne in the club, and the indian is the worst, they're rude. in the daily life, I dress normally, expat still stared at me, sometimes old fat expat.
ReplyDeletebut nah, Im not a gold digger, but the expat tries to date me. you dont think all the expat are rich.
Why we only talk about cheating bule expats? Like the local and the chinese men dont cheat? It is very well known that indo men cheat on the wife or girlfriend. The men even tell the stories to me.
ReplyDeleteI am an bule and date and party as i would at home. This not makes me a cheater.
Yes there are many (in my opinion) beautiful women in Indonesia. And for sure not all are golddiggers or looking for a mixed baby.
As everywhere else in the world there are cheaters, golddigers but also the nice and normal dating people.
So...dont say all expats are cheats...and also dont say all indo girls are golddiggers
Respect!!
Respect! Lol! Have to respect yourself!
ReplyDeleteIt's because us, ASIANS are ugly! We need more mixed white babies!
ReplyDeleteShame!
ReplyDeletethere are all types of men and women in all places/countries here on earth..cheaters,gold diggers..you can name them all, not just in Asia and not just to certain religious group... you are sinful human being if you choose to do it and no justification is acceptable for it..
ReplyDeleteI met a girl there a couple of years back, I live in the UK. She is amazing and now she is living with me in London. She is kind and has so much more to offer than all the lazy loud mouth losers I've been through (english girls). Indonesian women are kind and respectful, something that has been lost in a major way over here trust me. There a few UK girls that aren't out of shape or just whores but look around? There ain't that many men and guys just want beauty and a solid relationship. Women have fucked that up, not men.
ReplyDeleteI find all the above very interesting and just wish I'd know some of this before my 59 year old husband left to work in Jakarta. Now 3 months down the track I've lost him to a Indonesion prostitute that he's vowed his undying love for...he's left me and our 2 children and wants to take her 5 year old child on as his own, marry her and have more children with her. He's just turned 60 and I know he's very kind and will treat her well but he's treated us extremely badly. This girl is like a drug to him and he's totally addicted.
ReplyDeleteWomen be very careful letting your husbands loose in Jakarta, these girls will prey on them and they have no defences to ward them off. Remember all men think with their penis'
Sorry not all men intend to cheat. But when a female monkey walks around strutting her stuff 24/7 , yes eventually he will. No expat comes here with the intention to cheat. I have been with my husband at Bats on a saturday night having dinner, and even with me there they get closer and closer to the point where they just about sit on his lap. Its disgusting to watch how they throw themselves at a expat. CHEAP AND NASTY. They walk around in packs pretending they are meeting someone and yet never do OH and only drinking water until a expat finally buys them a drink. Its disgusting behaviour to see. They should be aware that as a expat female, we are laughing at you. YOU ARE ONLY SHORT TERM MOMENTS HAHAH
ReplyDeleteOh and the women who do snag a white expat. YOU LOOK RIDICULOUS> you will never be accepted amongst his expat friends and their wives. They may smile and tell you that your nice and Oh the baby is cute hahahhaha you. Behind ya back WE ARE LAUGHING AT YOU> If my husband strayed knowing all the knowledge we already know about the cheap monkeys that float around, YOU CAN HAVE HIM BUT know this his family back home will never accept you and god help you if you come near me or my area of town.
ReplyDelete@ the lady from August 15: it all sounds like you feel threaten by the indonesian women.
ReplyDeleteI think everybody is now laughing at you for writing this....IF (and i think he will) your man will stray then must be something wrong with you.....
well sorry but its true....western women with their new masculin attitudes...if i want that i will go gay....they have lost the very thing that made them attractive. They are in danger of becoming a dying breed.
ReplyDeleteThe indonesian women have that lovely quallity..they are still feminine.
Cant reccomend them highly enough.
Guys this is a good place to find long tern partners as well.
My partner is indonesian, i wouldnt trade her for the world.
When you read some of the comments posted here by western women re divorce " make them poor ", you can understand why less men want any further involvement with Europeans or Americans.
ReplyDeleteDo yourselves a favoUr boys...go to Asia.
Aug 15
ReplyDeleteI agree with you. the women here are so cheap. Well the single ones. Take a look in the mirror and go after your own. Oh and the guys that prefer the indo girls its only cos cheap and servant like. Racial tension in the home land will never accept you. I can assure you expat women are not insecure or masculine. Unfortunately when we go out in the street we have to dress more comfortable in case we get robbed or chased by looters etc. I can assure you at home it is a different story. majority of men when talking about hooking up with a indo say its great. They do everything for you even sex etc. Unfortunately eventually ts time for them to go home and the indo girl gets dumped. They know the girls because of their looks and being indo wont get accepted back home. My advice if the hubby strays you can have him but remember its only till he strays with another . You indo girls dont know western women. When western women have to say bye to marriage they take everything from him. Because in our country especially when kids are involved they are entitled to it. So remember he may have nothing much left for his new indo black monkey. And to the guys that say this is the best life. You are absolutely stuffed in the head. and a LIAR and you are only say it to get your end in even on this chat page. SHAME SHAME SHAME
Today is my last day in Jakarta. My husband of 32 years has gone off with a indo girl of 23. He is 62 years old. We have 5 children. Was I shocked, YES i was. He went to Delta many times for a massage. He would come home and tell me how relaxed he was. I was happy for him as i always worried about his neck and back. I thought great, finally a place where he gets some sort of pain relief. Unfortunately I didnt know what sort of relief he was getting. I have spent 9 years here learning to love the place and people. i gave up my career for his. He still has his job here but only just!!! If his company found out we were finished because of a indo girl he would lose his job. One of the rules with his company for married men is. If you come here as a married man,you remain here. if the company finds out you have strayed YOUR FINISHED. The reason I have not told his boss why i am leaving is because I dont want him coming home. He will now have to rely on his work mates not dobbing him in. His life in Oz would not be the same as he will have to support me and his kids till they are all over 21.At that stage we will divorce and he will lose alot. so he will need his indo girlfriend to take care of him then. The cheap way as in eating and living.He wont be able to take any property or money from our accounts. So to all those indo girls that think they can have what he has FORGET IT. Enjoy your new life in indo. I return to Australia a wealthier women in my pocket and in my heart and mind. I also leave with knowledge knowing that these men will never take you to australia to a NEW life as quite simply it WONT BE ACCEPTED. Have fun :)
ReplyDelete• It’s all about money with western women a couple of kids and you feel it’s ok to steal using the British court system the biggest joke in the world ...wouldn’t know a just decision if it smacked them in the face.....it makes me laugh really you have the audacity to call the Indonesian girls thieves.....They are amateurs at it compared to you lot. Nope I’m finished with your kind. I’ll keep my loving caring Indonesian lass. Wouldn’t touch you lot with a bargepole. My sons are coming around to have the same idea. I would be proud to have a grandchild from that continent.
ReplyDeleteI am a Chinese born Indonesian girl. Men go to bars only want to have fun, and it's not just bule, local men too. so I don't take them seriously...I don't even give my number :)
ReplyDelete-p-
Im a late 40s american man..Im going to pension early in a couple of years and plan a move to indonesia..I have game at home but I just don't want an american or other girl. I want to live in a new culture as AMerican life is about the "left and the right", don't care how many beautiful indonesian girls there are..but if I find one nice one that would be enough for me..
ReplyDeleteI'm intrigued with this article. As Indonesian woman I disagree although I have to admit that there are Indonesian girls who are described as to the article. Its really a pity that Indonesian girls are generalized as to what it says in the article, there are more than 4million female population in DKI Jakarta, not to mention from the outer Jakarta and I am very sure these Jakarta Girls described in the article are just few percentage of the female population in Greater Jakarta area. And unfortunately are the ones hanging around in Clubs and Bars.
ReplyDeleteI like and look for bule men but I go for the brain then look and their character or attitude. I don't go to bars and clubs for them and luckily I've been with bule men whom I met at work, thru friends or network.
Yes compare to Indonesian guys, the bule guys are more moderate and treat women equally. But I never want to close my eyes for moderate and open minded Indonesian guys because I know not all Indo guys are like what we all think.
For sure, the more exposed western lifestyle to Indonesian, the more open minded Indonesian girls will be and their interests on men will also increased.
I've lived in western country when i was in elementary to middle school and I have liked western boys since then. Therefore I get annoyed every time by this generalization over Indonesian girls towards Bule.
Ghosh... Interesting comments! Admit it, that no matter what you call us... Stupid, slutty, gold digger, cheap etc but we are different. We are passionate, full of life, easy going, warm, fun to be with, loving, not fake.... What else...??? :) having said that it doesn't mean I agreed with cheating
ReplyDeleteI'm really sorry for all the woman who lost the husband since they've moved jakarta or maybe indonesia......but indonesian woman is a woman, same as western woman, few of indonesian woman is a prostitute, same as few of western woman......between woman and prostitute having different mind set and thought. If, only if I ever be a prostitute, I would choose local man as a customer rather than western man. Why? With local man mean, little work but lot of payment! thats a dream work!! But for making love, I'm admit that western man much more better, they have different style, a trial every position, giving much, that we, indonesian wife dream of. I notice its many years ago soon my german husband made love to me at the first time. And even until today, I'm in mid 40 and he is earlier 50, we still have a great making love that I'm thanks GOD I'm not prostitute, else I'm sure I will bancrupt. Why? Simple, I couldnt get much customers after with him, coz I would very tired and have no energy even I'm in the mid of 20 or 30 age. Its not to compare when my ex local husband made love to me (btw, I was 10years divorced when first time met my german husband, and he has 5 years divorced from his western wife).
ReplyDeleteSo is indonesian wife, as a part of asian culture, we always try to give the best for husband. Good food, good atmosphere, smile and sex. Care him, serve him and respect him much. Mean also, clean his bed, serve his breakfast, make coffee for him, wash his underwear (at least that is what I do for my husband, and never let our maid did its). I don't shame at all to do its, I even very proud to tell everybody, as my mum also do the same to my dad. She said, never let another woman wash you and your husband underwear. I even never let other woman touch its.
I brought many time my husband to bats or whatever place where much prostitute hang out. Yes, they try every way to catch him.....but its because of her job. A marketing also will try everything to get market. But again, its depend of you how to handle its......I myself feel very pitty to them, they dont know that making love and get orgasm is much more wonderful than money. They are very young, pretty, stylish but knew nothing which is worth and not. My husband said, they have very pretty body outlook but I'm sure they dont know how to gave a wonderful bj as you !! Make sense, wonderful making love is a result of how two hearts says I love you when its cant be said more with words.
Many times also I brought my husband to meet friends, local man and woman. He is amazed with how indonesian woman caring their husband who is a local man. Corious, my husband asked me, are they got licked from their husband? I said to him, I will ask them. So, I asked them and they said at the same time "Shut up!!! you really have an error brain since married 'bule' " ....but after few second, they whispering me, yes I got its, after we watched movie, we want to practise its. Then they asked me, you got a lots? I said, I do facesit too. After take some time to describt what it is, they yell "you really unpolite!!!". Indonesian woman......
For me, never I love a man as I love my german husband, we have different culture, skin, habbit and so on....but, at the first time I saw him, I know that he is my soulmate.
that's just cos some loser who moved from a foreign country gets it easy in jakarta... all of a sudden he becomes a big shot (even though his salary is most probably standard...) and living it like kings here where life is quite cheap...
ReplyDeletegirls here fall for that too, they are so easily 'bought' and not just by money!
i am an indonesian girl who grew up abroad, and so many of these douchebags try to buy me the same way they do the local indonesian girls... but ... they can keep trying i guess.
but to give the local indonesian girls some justice, they are quite dedicated and caring, and they know how to show their love to their man because since they were young the idea of being a good and strong wife has always been implemented.
but guys and girls like them shouldn't be stereotyped because some are genuine, or worse.
So I've lived most of my life abroad too (Vietnam, America, and Germany) and have been traveling a lot. What I do notice here in indonesia is that most expats I saw, met, and get to know who came to live in Indonesia they are assholes. I mean, when I traveled around europe and america, the people there are really friendly!! The guys aren't assholes! (well except for the french guys I met in my experience, they are arrogant, selfish, and rude. sorry fench dudes :P)
ReplyDeleteAnyway I see why most expat men are rude and assholes (btw what I meant by assholes is that they cheat and lie and cheat cheat cheat): they think that they got it all. They think that they can get whatever they want, especially with earning a lot way more money than indonesians do monthly. They always put an image in mind that "all indo girls" will chase him, and that they will be "liked" by the locals. Well, yes you will be liked because some indonesians like the expatriats because of their skin, hair-color, and eye-color. And because a lot of indos are really short and many expats are tall and buffer, they get scared by the expatriate men, therefore they tend to be "nicer" (TWO-FACED NICE) to these foreigners than to the local people.
On top of that, I see these type of foreigners as losers. They're probably a loser back in their home country (yes I've met a lot of expats in indonesia and get to know the real them when they were back in their country. Their life really suck :P) Seriously get a life.
So on the indonesian girl part, not all indonesian women are dumb, stupid, and a gold-digger. Only prostitutes and hopeless educated women would hunt for expats for money therefore better life. I'm truly ashamed of having an image of Jakarta as the "prostitue land" or "cheating land" or "wonder land (of beautiful women who are basically gold digger and prostitues with a lot of make-up on)". It's only a matter of temptation guys. Smart-, careered-, and well-educated-women won't fall for foreign men for money, status, and pride. It's a matter of how they intellectually connect with each other, respecting each other no matter what their disadvantages are.
Mels
HAHAHA So funny all those Indonesian girls replying to the article!
ReplyDeleteI'm an expat in Jakarta and I've cheated too, mostly because there are so many beautiful, sexy, smart women available. And yes, it's much easier than in my home country. I am not a nobody there, but I'm not someone special either.
But you are wrong to think it's only gold-diggers interested in expats. It's 95% of the girls, whether they are uni students, doctors, celebrities, lawyers, married, divorced, young, old, models, or anything I can think of. Why are you girls ashamed to admit it?
The reason for that: Sorry to shock you but
it's not about money or status or religion or color of skin.
No, it's just because in general (not always):
BULE MEN TREAT THEIR WOMEN BETTER.
lol.. didnt know that im attracted to bule because i want to have mixed baby lol..and wow so many comment..i like night life some of the time, just enjoy the music, not hunting any bule to marry me.. or become gold digger,, theres lot of excecutive woman who just like to have fun, meet some new ppl and just enjoy the ambiance.. easy..
ReplyDeleteps: to any indo girls outhere.. dont hook up with marriage guy..coz karma is a bitch so beware, and dont play with the fire..theres so many other things called fun, without adding extra drama
ReplyDeleteGo local western expat ladies! Partake in the party scene like your male counterparts do! Believe me, MANY local guys would love to do it with you! And I'm sure it's not just in Bali - the land of the Kuta Cowboy - that you'd be sought after!
ReplyDeletesometime it is really not nice when we are as indonesian women get label" easy women, golddigger"
ReplyDeleteas not all of us is like that
i hv expat female friend who never paid her bill
she will drink if guys order her drinks
she is russian
please dont judge us badly,,,,looks around u
to the anonymous who written at september 26, 2012 1:39am........believe me, only a dumb looser man will judge other people in general. A smart and real man would never judge other people........who the hell he think he is? No need to be sad to be judged by a dumb looser, they just got what they can, the same dumb looser. Just remember onething, 'a smarty' will never dated 'a dumbass' !!
ReplyDeleteI'm an Indonesian girl, freshman in college and i like both bule and local boys but i'm not that desperate hahaha.
ReplyDeleteI like to go to bookstores in Senayan and meet some expat's sons there but i'm classy girl and i don't look for money, i just like their looks.
I had some foreigner boyfriends and they treat me good, not pervert. I dont wear provocative clothes, I'm beautiful and cute in my way :P
I went to club a two times only with my mix boyfriend (ex) and it's crazy.
Classy and smart girls like me will never date guys from bar/club.
P.S: I only date guys my age lol
For all white women that lose their husband,
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry for you but I think it will be the same case if he is in Thailand or Russia or Ukraine anywhere where tons of beautiful sexy girls will do anything to get men for better living.
For all bars girls, keep on good work make sure you save some cash before you become old, fat with tons of kids and broke probably some disease too..it just another day before u are the one that being left by the bules.
For all educated indo girls that fancy bule guys for whatever reason, there always somebody for somebody..keep looking for good ones and eliminate the sleazy one no matter how fun/hot they are..the good men does exist it just takes time to find them and please just because you are smart and rich women with amazing career, dont forget that bule men dating/like Asian women for some reason and that is usually submissiveness so don't even try to behave like white women! don't please..
Btw the number of white guys/expats are increasing in Jakarta so there always chance for anyone..lot of bules now still stick with their partner (white girls or other race) cos just simply they are amazing, well hey there are lot of good looking, slim, elegance, smart bules women too..so I think women at any race have chance as long yeah you are good looking lol...keep on good work!
me : Indonesian girl with western education and bright career
For everyone who like "Bule" or caucasian men, Im as Indo girl would prefer asian men than them. Simply, because Asian men is more handsome inside, outside.
ReplyDeleteI'm going to talk based on my experiences
The caucasian men (That I've met) have no sense of humour. They always focus on the boob no matter how beautiful the girl is.
Eventhough They attracted to a indo girl, They still choose the caucasian to be their wife.
For the education, the Asian men are equals to the caucasian. Come on! not all of the asian is uncivilized, and Some caucasian men are not really educated enough.
For my fellow indo girls, Please be objective! Everything from western isn't always good and
The Asian isn't always conservative
For the expats, please don't generalize too much. If sometimes indo girls were friendly or warm, it didn't mean they attracted to you.
Please don't have too much self confidence lah..
And be faithful to your lady there. Don't make "annoying" girls outhere screwed up. Teach them what is the real life instead being a gold-digger
cheers
I love to date Indonesian woman if I had a chance to do so! Still finding the rite time to get one! Me just a normal Asian guy a.k.a the dungeons in early 30's never go to university or high school but made thousand of dollars every hours wif my street smart skills wanna typical exotic and gorgeous one so that I can train them in every aspetcs! First u get the money than the power than u get the woman but if they betrayed me she gonna paid back all tha good times that we shared before and the lessons that they never learn in school or university! Lessons for money suckers and cheaters!
ReplyDeleteLol if you lost your husbands to Indonesian women, then shouldn't you learn from your enemy?
ReplyDeleteTreat your men like a man, not properties.
And if Indonesian women like foreigners for whatever their reasons are, good on you all...
If foreigner guys got cheated by Indonesian golddiggers, lol, cry more.
For Indonesian women who don't like foreigners, good on you too...
Ps; Android rules!
Local men need some love too <3
Sorry, expat wife....Indonesian women are sluts who see expat men as nothing more than a walking ATM machine and are willing to give it up to any fat sweaty expat who will dish out the cash. they have no pride and the men who cheat with them are losers of the highest degree...but hey chalk me up as one pissy wife. have some pride people!
ReplyDeleteAll this, I felt sick to my stumic!!!
ReplyDeleteomg you guys!
ReplyDeletethe same as not all british drinks tea, not all spanish can dance salsa, not all american votes for Obama..
every person is different. you can't just make them into groups. it's not high school for God's sake!
Of course if you go to a club, you'll find more bitch than if you go to a mall for example.. If you wanna find and meet nice girls for serious relationship, don't try to find it in a club. come on you have a brain to use.
I have been dating my foreign boyfriend for two years, and I'm really tired of people looking at us strange! Get a life! it's not like I'm a "expats hunters" or so.. He's my first expat bf and hopefully my last and he happens to be the most romantic and nice guy I've ever met..
So, should I leave him just because you guys think "ahh, she must be a bitch!" or "what a expat hunter gold digger"??
Don't judge if you don't wanna be judge!
It's tiring and heart breaking to be judge! seriously. get a life!
-TY
this is one of the most stupid posts I have ever read in my entire life !
ReplyDeleteI always go to Thailand for some wholesome FUN but after reading this post I might give Indonisia a visit, I need loads of loving
ReplyDeleteTBH, i cant get horny with any Asian men, no matter how i tried, no matter how handsome they are. Cos thinking of having sex with them is like doing it with my cousin, uncle, my parent's friend, my sister's friend, so on.
ReplyDeleteSo yes, it feels less disturbing to imagine screwing a white man, as if theyre fictional characters that dont remind me of my family. Other than white man the other species that i dont mind doing it are with androids and anime characters :p
Anyway, im a very family-minded jilbab woman, financially independent. Yes, im normal woman too, just because im conventional muslim and like to cover myself doesnt mean i dont think about 'those stuffs'.
what we call hypocrisy in the West it's pretty much norm here. the head of state is the best example so why do we marvel about it? Indonesia is still an unknown country to many western people as we only it as a place of terrorism , natural disasters , intolerance towards other religions. people have to survive on less then $2 a day , whilst pushed being pious with their religion. truth hurts hence the double standards towards a lot of things also love. I have dated many girls here based on my looks ( mixed parents but both from Indonesia) all the above written i ve encountered double standard , lying , dishonest and over drama. again i see and experience it through the fact i'm born and bred in Europe, however the girls see it different and refuse to learn or change them selves despite posing them selves as modern, western or educated. Morality is taught through parents, school or religion but the overall anything goes here attitude is sickening. Money is God here and same goes with status and appearance. It 's not strange the Chinese and Indians rule the economy here as they have strong unity and values to push them selves to become better, whilst the local people accept to slave them selves to them, why can the Dutch rule here for 350 years plus? i have tried to add my contribution to help the locals but in the end only westerners are supporting this and the Indonesians just follow the funky Westerner..
ReplyDeleteIt takes at least 3 generations before Indonesia can be considered a serious country only if the people can become mature , toughen up and open minded.
any place to meet nice sincere indonesian locals where we could be friends
ReplyDeletei am a male 30 from singapore.
Hm..... i would like to say as Indonesian who dated western. I'm 26 and i have professional career - i can say my income can be equal with the expat, I dated 41 years old western for two years. Don't judge before u really involved... There are many nice Indonesian women who have sincere heart and pure love.
ReplyDeletewhere can a guy coming to your country go to find a nice woman im in my 40's looking for a good woman (wife material) not whore
ReplyDeletemr coolballs
^_^ Keep positive..
ReplyDeleteBule or Not..it doesnt matter as long as love come between both of you.
Indonesian Ladies, we are too precious to take seriously those negative toughs. Love is blind, no matter what your colors. Respect and caring are most important.
Question is : have you respected your hubby/wife ?
ReplyDeleteI was not so shock reading the article since i've spent many times in Blok m during my high school and had seen enough gold diggers chasing bule.
A whore is a whore , an a non-whore (good or not) can easily tell it just by a glimpse from the way they bring their self in the community.
Being an indo-woman, one thing i can tell is that all indo (boy/girls)that came from good family must actually be raised with strict custom (and prostitute etc was far far far from being accepted in real local family).
Some of the post make me think that to bule, most of indonesian woman are easy (instead of conservative which actually was always being learned from elementary in Indo school and no wonder whore did not know since most whore did not even go to school).
did anybody know any expat community (western or japanese) where people can just meet up and share minds, or continue date if they like, but without being seen as gold-diggers or whore (like in bars?)?
I am woman, 28, a manager of huge corporate company and just wanted to meet up expat for casual talks since i'm fed up and hopeless with most local men i've met. I have some relations with western guy and its unacceptable when they flirt just so laid over me like im a whore (while i don't even dress like one!)
hey to the woman manager who posted above, im looking for a nice lady to marry, is it possible to meet up with you anytime soon. I am Arab early 40's will visit your capital soon
ReplyDeleteJeezz..I can not help myself to think what values those expats men in Indonesia have had actually. Mind the girls, when there is sugar, there is always ants around.
ReplyDeleteSorry to say this, but it sounds to me that these expatriates described in this article actually have no moral values and easily tempt only just to looks - no brainer. Perhaps itl companies and itl organisations have to do better in selecting their expatriates to developing countries. It's not only IQ but EQ and morally equipped who respect locals and also family/partnership values.
My dad has cheated with a more than a few bar girls in Jakarta when we lived there. My mother had gotten an eating disorder with sleeping disabilities to follow. I have not gotten any financial benefits from him and feel unworthy resulting in extreme trust issues. When my father returned to his homeland, he ended up with a divorce, lack of respect and an extravagant amount of shame from his whole family and old friends... If you are a father having some "fun" in Jakarta, I really think about the people that you love and how you are hurting them. Family stays forever while fuckers leave after pleasuring. You choose.
ReplyDeleteMy mother is also a doctor. Who helped all prostitutes in Indonesia with HIV/AIDS or other sexual transmitting diseases to be able receive their suitable medical attention. My mother helped them. I respect their employment but am extremely negatively suprissed of their reasons why they would pleasure a "blue". They are innocent and simply do not know better, I do pity them. The bar girls are being labeled such bad names while the bastards fucking them are actually the subject of this whole article. Stop hating on the escorters/hostesses/bar girls (look at those suitable names) , hating is bad but if you have to, hate on the failed, insecure and mentally disabled (this is not an insult but an actual case, they ) men who pay these girls. If your a dad or just simply cheating, please go fuck yourself... until you pay another woman to do it for you :) Excuse my language and spelling throughout, I am only 15 and wanted to quickly spread the clear message that reality has been dying to send :)
ReplyDeleteGirl are just Horny...its simple...must be the weather... or White guys have huge dicks ..whatever..just let Jakarta be the next Sodom and Gomorrah
ReplyDeleteWhat about expat women cheating? Some important, rich, politicians in Jakarta are crazy about the opportunity to fuck foreign blonde diplomats and will go far in gifts, courting, handing over political secrets etc. to get in bed with these women. Seen all the "lunch meetings" in Hotel Borobudur and Hotel Alila next to the Presidential Palace?
ReplyDeleteI need to tell you a funny story. I am a South Asian and i visited one of the Jakarta hotspots with a Bule colleague.
ReplyDeleteI am 30 and this guy is 45; I am fit and he is a flab; I earn more money than him; I have Masters and he has no college. Hell .. I have hair in my head and he doesn't!!
But guess what, the girls made a beeline for my colleague. While I met 1/2 very attractive girls, it was obvious who was more popular. One of the girls just could not believe that an Asian could be the boss of a Bule. She thought that we are taking the mickey out of her .... Oh well! that is the way life goes I guess.
Asian girls anywhere are going for primarily for status and material safety or gain. Sure, if a man is young and/or physically attractive, they take that too but it is certainly nowhere near the top of the priority list. Younger men are also more difficult to please and potentially more careful with how they spend their money. These girls in general come from modest backgrounds and entering the party scene is their best shot at upward mobility. Successful Asian men - while also indulging in the scene - will hardly ever get serious with such a girl; - not because they are immune to infatuation and affection but because of rigid societal standards. So, Caucasian men - who are a lot less particular and regarded as well-heeled and relaxed - are a girl's best shot. You can gauge the overwhelming importance of the wealth difference from how the scene has changed in Singapore. The "Sarong Party Girl" of Singapore nationality of the eighties and nineties has become a virtually extinct species thanks to the rising affluence in the city state. If you consider this regrettable, do not worry because in all those cities which are in countries with a large rural population and a huge income gap, economic development and the leveling of the playing field will be a much more protracted process and that will keep the scene in those countries alive for years to come.
ReplyDeletejust enjoy your fuck
ReplyDeleteWell, i dont agree about Indonesia girl, many many good indonesia girl going to party but not for prostitute, sorry to say if im going to party or club , i never looking bule to get money, but a lot of bule find girl only for sex, be smart if bule living in jakarta or indonesia, if you take one of them for your life, and your oriented only for sex hmm you will get problem, because they unhonest and unloyal, my suggest if you find indo girl find at office and good place for good life.
ReplyDeleteif you cheat then you cheat, some of the comments made by bastards who don't admit they never respect love and blame something else. Jakarta never makes you evil. you are the real devils yourselves! even without indonesian girls, we would still love porn. we have the blood of cavemen who want control and pleasure in everything. your wives don't know? therefore, you are experts! that's all.
ReplyDeletedon't blame woman cause not all Indonesian woman are slut or gold digger. White man who cheat his wife or his girl friend behind them is a kind of BASTARD and ASSHOLE...this white man just want to fuck and follow his cock needs without thinking about the result they will create for fuck he did...they never think what they did will hurt their wife, family or their gf....so, never choose white boy who live in Indonesia and like to spend time for clubbing every week.....
ReplyDeleteI had a girlfriend from university ,she said we "tunangan"(compromise)love mereal,etc..but truth is she seldom look like real.No matter how much money,gifts,attentions, care,etc..she proved later everything was basically abuse and lack of faithfulness.They are just rubish,dont mean all most of them,large majority.Egois,superficial,cheaters,..rubish to use and trowth!.PELACURS...
ReplyDeleteRemember your all party sex people that die is absolutly. From now better u start remember your God and you left age.
ReplyDeleteIndonesian women are freaking ugly. Sure, they make look decent in the dark and with makeup, however I have NEVER seen a one who even looks remotely decent during the day. Coupled with the fact that 99% of them have the most warped and twisted morals/values/personalities - I find nothing attractive about them.
ReplyDeleteIf you are a fat, old and ugly expat - the temptation is there. This represents the vast majority here in Indo. However if you are a good looking guy who never had any issues being with real stunning looking Western women, you will find Indonesian women repulsive.
JR
Interesting. Having lived in many countries with my husband we have seen first hand how many expat men latch onto local girls, FOR COMFORT. Many of the men are old, fat, bald & ugly and it never enters their stupid heads that most of the girls who are mostly very beautiful & educated only want the man for what's in his back pocket not the front pocket. The girls want out of the missery they live in & this is an easy way for them. The men would never get a woman like these girls in their own countries, no young girl there would give them a second glance. Men can be very weak, lazy and stupid. They just want a women who will do all the work while they lay on their back and have the girl do it all for them,in the house & bed, & to cart a pretty girl on their arm. Do they realise how stupid they look. I have asked some of these men do the go home and tell their wife about the girls in the countries they work, do they take home all sorts of diseases to their wives? I know they don't tell their wives & I know they do take home diseases, it happened to a friend of mine. So it's not just the women in Indonesia, its girls in all mostly 3rd world countries who hanker for an expat man to get them out ot the misery they live in, I don't blame the girls I'd probably do the same thing in their place. Having a baby with an expat is a sure way of getting the man. Two Aust men we know took girls from Africa back to Aust, one had a baby with his girl. Once the girls got their resident papers, they were off, the men were left alone, againn no Aust women wanted them now thats for sure. I don't blame the girls, the men were idiots.
ReplyDeleteRGR
Pls take me out. I'm hot and available, 0818828589 @LizaTobing xoxo
ReplyDeleteInteresting that the Jakarta bars are almost empty on Ramadan. Would this be an indicator that the sluts who earn their fun &/or living in those bars are muslim? Would this mean that only on Ramadan the sins of lust and alcoholism are not allowed. So all the regular "femmes fatales" put the potato bags on their heads and pretend to be ugly= good girls in the face of a deity who is asleep, or perhaps blind and deaf at other times?
ReplyDeleteI'm obviously confused. Could someone explain!
Next week , i'll be there for a training session ., Just want to see jakarta ., If anyone intrested and have a free time from 6 pm to 2 am , please share , me Male age 26 from India
ReplyDeleteDont get confused. ur hollow head will be aching. Rest in peach, avoid this blog and the places mentioned in this.
ReplyDeleteEverybody will die, not only the party people. God is every where, even while when we are in party.. And tonight let's enjoy life, take everything tonight, for all we know, we might not get tomorrow....
ReplyDeleteJust enjoy your life... you live just once. Go for it:)
ReplyDelete