As a single guy who travels quite a lot (partly to write my Nightlife Guides), I have had plenty of opportunities to explore the online dating scene in Southeast Asia.

Online dating is probably the best way to meet girls in the region. Even an average-looking guy with limited social skills can manage to date pretty girls here as long as he knows how to play the game.

In the following article, I will give you 10 practical tips on how to master online dating in Asia. These recommendations are easy to implement, almost effortless, and yet they can make the difference between success and failure.

Most are based on my personal experiences, some were inspired by friends' stories and the rest is just common sense. You should also read my article Best Countries for Online Dating in Asia for more great tips on how to meet Asian girls.

If you feel I forgot to mention something important, please don't hesitate to leave a message in the comment section below.


→ Know the right dating websites and apps in Asia
You cannot be successful online if you don't use the right dating websites and apps. Some of them can be popular in a country, but terrible in another one. Badoo, for instance, is OK in the Philippines and Vietnam, but not in Malaysia or in Singapore (where OK Cupid works better).

It also depends on who you are and what you are looking for. Each website/app will usually target a specific demographic.

- Are you a young guy backpacking around Southeast Asia and looking for hook-ups? Use Tinder
- Are you a man living abroad looking for a serious Asian girlfriend? Use Asia Dating
- Are you a young expat looking for an upper-class girlfriend? Use Paktor

I give more details about this in my guide: Online Dating in Asia - Best Apps and Websites to Meet Girls (2017).
AsiaDating works well with older men looking for relationships  
→ Make sure you have some great but consensual pics
Your pictures are the most important part of your online profile. Having no pictures or just a few blurry ones is a recipe for disaster. Only desperate girls, ladyboys or prostitutes might be interested in an empty profile.

Upload at least 5 or 6 recent photos of you in a positive environment. Ideally, 4 pics of you alone (traveling, outdoor, at a restaurant, etc - something that could spark a conversation) and 2 pics with family or friends. Make sure that you are smiling and that you don't look creepy. Looking at your photos, a girl must think: "I want to be with that man".

Photos to avoid: Selfies in general and particularly in the bathroom, nude torsos, gym pics, elephant riding, baby tiger cuddling, pictures of you next to your motorbike or your car (or even worse, next to a car that does not belong to you).

I understand that some guys don't like to put a picture of their face for privacy reasons (because they are already in a relationship, scared to be seen by colleagues, etc). If you are in this situation, then the solution is to use non-traditional dating websites/apps such as Facebook, Instagram, Beetalk, WeChat, etc. I talk about all these in Best Apps to Meet Girls in Asia (2017).

→ Spend time writing a bio for your profile
Make the effort to write at least one paragraph with those key elements:  Who you are - What do you like (mention 2 or 3 sports, hobbies, TV shows, singers, books or movies) - What is attractive about you (you cook, you read, you travel, you play an instrument, etc) - What kind of girl you are looking for (and for what kind of relationship).

Avoid self-deprecating ("I'm just an average guy", etc), bragging ("You won't find a better guy"), complaining about your previous relationships, negativity ("I don't like ...).

Don't talk about money ("I own...") unless you want to attract all the worst gold diggers.

An easy and cheap way to create a bio is to use Fiverr. On this website, there are hundreds of girls and guys who can help you write it for just $5. Just search for "dating" or "tinder" and you'll see plenty of interesting offers.

→ Adapt your profile and conversations to Asian culture
While being sarcastic or ironic is common in Europe, it might not always be well interpreted in Asia. Only use it cautiously with girls who are westernized.

In general, I would say that Asian girls don't really care if your bio is funny, witty or original. Instead, they will prefer someone who can make them feel comfortable. This means someone who is not judgemental, not weird, not blunt, and not acting like a playboy.

→ Invest in a sim card
In Asia, you can normally buy a sim card with 1 month of mobile data for less than $10. Being always connected allows you to reply as soon as a girl messages you or matches with you.

You need to be aware that the prettiest girls receive hundreds of messages every week and that they never reply to all of them.

Why they'll reply to some guys and not to other ones is often a question of timing. As we say in France, "you have to hit the iron while it's hot". If you initiate a conversation right after you've been matched, at a time when she still remembers your profile, then she is most likely to answer.  If you need 2 hours to do so, then she'll probably find someone else to talk to in the meantime.

→ Use multiple apps and websites
Most guys I know make the mistake of using only 1 dating app or website. Typically, they will set up strict filters (age, mensuration, distance, etc), then as they only get a few matches, they slowly remove the filters to increase their success rate.

But the truth is they are actually lowering their standards when they could just use other dating sites and apps.

→ Spend some money (if you can afford it)
When you arrive in a new location, don't hesitate to spend a little money to boost your profile or to upgrade your membership. The idea is to get the largest number of quality matches possible, and then to select the best ones for chatting.

→ Use the pipeline strategy (for tourists or travelers)
Tourists and travelers who arrive in a new city must generally face the same question from girls: "Do you actually live here?". If you say that no, you are only in town for a couple days, you can expect the chat to end almost immediately.

Some guys use the pipelining strategy to prevent this issue. They anticipate their trips weeks or days in advance, developing online relationships with a few girls they like. They slowly build excitement (often with bullshit), until they finally arrive in Asia.

This technique can really help you skip steps but it takes time and preparation. It is particularly effective with websites belonging to the Cupid Media network (AsianDatingThaiCupidVietnamCupid, etc). Girls on these sites are looking for foreigners and they generally don't mind chatting with someone who is far away.
→ Be efficient and decisive
Being efficient means having high-quality dates with great girls without spending hours or days online chasing them.

In general, after 15 minutes of chatting, you should be able to ask a girl's Whatsapp, Line or WeChat number. This will allow you to either make a phone call or better, a video call.

A video call is an excellent way to make things move forward.

First, it allows you to make sure that the person you are talking to is not fake, not lying about her age, not a ladyboy, and not using photoshopped pics. Within seconds, you will know if this is a girl you want to meet or not.

Second, it builds intimacy. By hearing your voice and seeing you in real, it will be easier for a girl to trust you and to accept a physical encounter. Seize the opportunity and just ask her out directly before ending the call.

Note: Take a video call as seriously as a real date. Make sure you look fresh, with at least a t-shirt on, and tidy up your place.

→ Stay in a strategic location
You should always stay in a hip, central area with plenty of caf├ęs and bars around where you can invite your dates. You can read my Asia Nightlife Guide to help you with that as I always include a selection of the best hotels near the nightlife.

Do you have online dating tips as well? Please don't hesitate to share them in the comment section below!

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